Apotee Production. Welcome back to another episode of Am I A Bad Mom?
Podcast?
The content is never ending.
It is never ending. I had a moment actually this morning as I was at my local gym and I was doing my own little workout, and they have a Mum's and Bubbs class going at the same time, and so there's babies glore, and you know, there was a smidge of a second and I say smidge where one of them was just so delightful and laying on the ground, probably about like maybe six or seven, maybe six months and just laying there happy and Google and Gaga and I had that small moment where I was like, oh,
felt the ovary and then I was like thought back to the morning that I'd had with my nine and eleven year old getting ready for school, and it just quickly went away.
It's like that saying a dog's not just for Christmas, it's for life.
It's like, because.
You see those will remember all those ads like RSPCA or whatever. It's like everyone's falling in love with these little, cute, little baby animals, and then you get the puppy home and then it grows up and then it's.
Keeps growing, keep some on growing. It was funny because I must have been smiling and staring and watching and you know, whilst I was doing my workout, not in a creepy way. But then the trainer she looked at me and she's so lovely and she goes, oh, are you clocky?
Right?
Sure? Maybe there it could be a number three. And I looked at her and I was like, I can help you out. I'll give you my nine and an eleven year old and I'll make you not clocky either. Am I a bad mum for not calling home? Funny?
You had a little trip away by yourself, a little bit of your own time.
You know. The funniest part is you and I. When we first started this podcast, I was all for it, right, travel, travel, travel, take the time for yourself, recharge the batteries. You'll be better for it, and so will everyone else around you. And then I had that moment where I just it was the last second book a trip and go that feeling of just needing to jump off the edge just for a while, just for a while. I just needed to go and just bite the bullet and do it.
And because I hadn't troubled, I was working it out. I hadn't troubled for ages, let alone without anyone else. So yeah, I booked a trip and I headed for New York City.
I know it wasn't just let you went to Byron for the weekend. You went to New York, New York all in. I'm such a fan of doing this now because, like you said, when we first met, I never did that, never went anywhere without the kids, Like.
It was a no, you just don't do it.
Yeah, I took my kids to my honeymoon. Fuck, I'm owned a honeymoon. I really am owed a honeymoon. I feel like, but I remember when you first said, but actually, it's good for everyone. So it's not just good for you to not be with them. It's good for them to not be with you, and then you miss each other and then you're better afterwards and you have had that time for yourself.
I think what was different this time, though, was that the reception from them was a little bit different. So when I had first left, they were like, oh, I can't believe you're going without us. Yeah, I wondered whether, and then I got, well, what are you going to get us? What are you going to buy us? And
I was like, well nothing. And then the other part was within the first because the travel timing, like the travel time of you know, you leave here and then you sort of almost think we lose like a day or something like that. I'm not good with all the travel times with the US, but I felt like I hadn't talked to them for a few days. Obviously I missed them, I missed them so much, but I didn't really care to check in because I had sorted, as
we do, we talk about this all the time. I'd sorted everything that I needed to for that entire time of being away. So everything the plan.
Yeah, And I remember saying to you even before you went, you were like, Okay, I've still got to order touch shop and this, and now I said, write a list and do it at the airport. Yeah, and then get it done and then you can just have your own time. It's really important not to constantly be on FaceTime and stuff like that when you go away. And actually the time difference is a blessing.
Yeah, that time difference. It helped. It just made me not have to and I didn't feel bad. And they understood it, like they understood that, you know, when one was awake and vice versa. The other was sleeping just read happening. Though thanks for the advice, because I did take the advice on there was a few things on my to do list, which one of them was grocery shopping. Remember having the conversation after we'd finished the podcast. Yeah,
you were like, don't be silly, just order it. So then I get to the airport and all was going well, and then I get down. I thought, I've got enough time for a coffee, get to coffee line up, and it was so long and the time of me waiting in this coffee lineup just to order and also wait for my coffee to come out the other side, I'd done my shopping, I'd done my woolies online click and collect, and my mum was picking it up that afternoon. Yeah. See,
so that was done and easy. And then because I'd done the shopping, I was like, well I did touch shop orders. I'd done that, so that was all ticked off. So I had made it quite not clinical, but it was very straightf like everything was done, you know, like everything was.
You got to make it easy for yourself, like also because the times where you give yourself guilt as a mum, and things like, for example, when you know we've gone somewhere on a trip or whatever and there's been like a babysitter or whatever, and thinking I've got to make sure they've got dinner blah blah blah blah blah, and then going, actually, what would make my life easier Get a couple of microwave mills.
Yeah, shove them in the fridge.
They can heat them up, or give them, you know, something that they can make for themselves. I feel like there were so many occasions where I would make things so much harder for myself, thinking oh, no, I need to do this and that, and just going actually, you know what, who guess.
They're going to be okay. Yeah. The part of it is that I still even now, like I've been home a few days, they were very very happy to see me. I have to give them that. Elsie's first comment to me when she gave me a really big hug she came sprinting over because I'd got off the plane. And then it was a full day ahead of me, which she happened to be a gala day playing netball, So I called in to see her and watch a game or two, and then she came running in and she says,
don't ever leave me for that long again. And I was like, oh, babe, I said, that's very kind of you. I said, but I'm sure you've had a ball like you look very happy and healthy. She was like, yeah, but just don't leave me. But I didn't feel bad. Okay, this is where I'm coming back to. As I didn't look to FaceTime, I didn't look to check in like I would check in and just go how's everyone traveling.
And there was a time where my mum, like Nanade, messaged me and was like, hey, I just thought i'd give you an update from home in case you were wondering. And I was like, oh, yeah, I think. I just left knowing that everything was somewhat organized. But at the same time, I was like, wow, I have not done this for so long that it was almost different this time, that the guilt had sort of parked itself before i'd even left. Yeah, didn't feel bad, didn't feel bad at
all because I'd ticked all the boxes. And then I had that moment of going like Sam does this all the time, always away, but there's no like, do you need a hand with me organizing the Woolworth Shop for you before I go.
This is the between Yeah, I really do feel and you know, not everyone, but my experience as well as the difference between dads and mums. I remember Jay saying to me ages ago he was like reading the paper, like he still likes an old school paper on the weekend, and he was reading the paper and there was some sort of offer for a holiday in there, and he went on, just book this now, and I went, no, no, because what you'll do is you'll go, let's book the
holiday and then you'll turn up for the holiday. Yeah, I have to do all the other shit because I'm thinking about everything else. Who do we get to look after the kids, who's going to drive them there, how they're going to get here, what they're gonna eat, who's gonna make the bedding up? All of that stuff.
Yeah. I didn't feel bad about that either, because I was like, oh, no, I totally need this. But yeah, I just went and got lost in you know, in New York City streets, went to different workouts. I did, you know, I didn't really do anything crazy, but I did what I wanted to do.
So you've been back three days. Do you feel like you never went anywhere.
Yes, I think that was like when we first started. I was like, yeah, I feel like I you know, like I've been back for a weekend and I feel like I haven't missed anything. No, this morning's getting ready for school. Put me back in that frame of mind. Put you right back in your place.
I haven't missed me