Why We Paused For A Bit: Celebrating Life in the Midst of Such Loss

First , let me back up and say I know that this is becoming something because people reached out to me when the podcast episode didn't drop on Sunday as it normally does , so thank you for that . It makes it feel like a real thing .

It's not that I think this is a hobby , but I feel doing the live stream on Thursday nights with Rick Costa and also all of our friends who are joining in and guests that we have , is something that I need to be doing because it is part of who I am .

I love Hollywood , I love this town , I love performing , I love being around people , and so this was my way of manifesting all of that by just taking control of it . I was like maybe there's going to be one or two friends of mine who are listening in on the podcast , but I realize now that so many of you are being so supportive , so thank you .

I do not have a huge staff of people , so I did post that I would be taking a pause this week I did not post something on the podcast , so my apologies . In the future I will do better . But let me also just say that the reason that I took the pause is because I lost a family member this past Monday .

If you have ever read my book not that I'm promoting that at the moment , but if you did read my book , I talk about the Lowell's as the chapter heading . I believe it's like page 93 .

Their real name is the Martins , and the twins , mary and Joanne , are friends of mine who I grew up with in grammar school and in high school and their parents became my godparents . I think it was sophomore year in high school . I asked them to be my godparents because I had never been baptized .

I'm not very religious and I wasn't back then either , but it was part of needing a connection and also it was for me . It was becoming officially part of family in some way , shape or form , and they were always just there for me . And Patty Ann , who is the oldest , passed away unexpectedly last Monday .

It was heart-wrenching and sad and this is someone I loved and it's just an interesting dynamic that happens and I have to tell you and yeah , my Boston accent has become a little bit more pronounced this week because I was around so many Bostonians . It was awesome . Even I could hear my accent change .

That was like at one point I just started laughing out loud because I could hear my Rs just disappearing within 20 minutes . It was hilarious . But I took a pause this week because I had to and I don't feel bad about it .

I hope in the future that when I have a bigger staff or we have the ability money-wise to hire more people , maybe we'll do a better job of just posting something when we have to take a pause . But please know you can always go to wwwaatjoycom , which is all about the joycom , and you can check out our Instagram . You can check out Facebook , linkedin .

I'll always have posted something like a little poster that says where we're at , at the very very least . So I do apologize to podcast listeners who did not know where I was or what was happening , but thank you for reaching out to me because it did make me feel like , oh my God , other people are listening .

So yes , Patti Ann passed away unexpectedly on Monday . I flew out immediately and was there for most of the week and I just got back a minute ago . So I am now doing this with no sleep whatsoever , so you can hear it in my voice , but I want to make sure I posted something , because I did get some emails and some text messages .

So thank you for your concern . I am fine and the family is okay . And here's what I learned and here is what I love . It was a sad , unexpected situation and her birthday had been on Sunday . She passed away on Monday . We all know that she's in a better place .

That's what we all know and believe and she's with mom and dad and , uh , I think there's some happiness in that and even though there was so much sadness , it was beautiful to see all of her nieces and nephews , the cousins , who all get along so well , all the kids who just love each other .

After the ceremony , memorial service I don't wanna call it a church service because it really wasn't a church service , but after all that was done and there was sadness or whatever we went and had food together and we all ended up dancing and singing to music and I at one point was because I'm not a big drinker , I'm a lightweight .

Anyone who knows me like I was drinking wine coolers . So at one point I was just sitting there watching at the , you know , from a stool at the bar , and I was watching these kids , these millennials but mostly Gen Z , you know like on that cusp , and they knew every Motown song . They knew every song of Donna Summer , which was a big favorite of hers .

They knew all of these old school songs of their auntie and I don't know why that shook me so much . They were like you know , no , no , no , put this song on . No , no , no , do this one next . And it was so lovely . At one point I felt like it was going in slow motion .

I was watching kind of this beautiful sparkliness of all of them laughing and singing and praising and loving on their aunt Patty and their sister , and it was just so amazing and I thought to myself that is what life is all about . Right , life is , as we all know , this amazing journey , and I'm not gonna say that life is short .

I'm so sick of that cliche Because you know what , sometimes life feels really long . You know what I mean . Like sometimes it feels like , oh , my goodness , can we get through this day ? But I think we've all just keep hearing this like life is short .

Life is short , but you know what , life is pretty magnificent and when you're doing life right , it has these moments of sheer sadness , sheer anger , joy , happiness . It just has its ebbs and flows and what I noticed for myself , the most important part for me is being around people who love fiercely .

You know , I didn't know everybody who was friends with Patty Ann and with her husband Paul , and I didn't know everybody there . I'd met them . I've met people briefly , because when mom passed away I was there as well , and so I met some of these people . But there were other people there as well . But what was amazing was it didn't matter .

I did know that right , because there was such an infusion of gratitude and memory sharing and acceptance , because we were all there for a common reason . And I started thinking about just how life has this amazing way of making us walk through so many different feelings and so many different moments . And it's not those moments that matter as much .

It's the moments in between and how you're able to move along anyway that matters . And that's what I realized right . Who we are is always tested , not in the easiest of moments . It's really simple to be a great and wonderful human being when you have everything you need , but who are you when things are hard , right ?

How do you help another person , even if you're in pain ? How do you climb out of a situation ? Do you pull others up or do you pull them down into your sorrow ? And all I saw was people trying to help each other walk through this moment and get to the other side and try to find joy anyway .

And look at , there's gonna be a lot of bumps along the way after this , because she was 59 , way too young . It should have never happened . And there's going to be moments of pain and sorrow . My mom passed away I don't even know . Now 40 years , and I have moments of anger and sadness and then moments of elation and joy .

And we're talking it's 40 years already , right , so I'm not saying it's gonna be easy now , but what I do know for sure is all about the joy really is a thing , and sometimes , even when I doubt myself , I am reminded that the reason why I am able to still be here today is because , no matter what has happened in my life , no matter what moments have

brought me down , I have always been able to be lifted up by beautiful , amazing people . The Martins , for sure , are a big part of that from my childhood and I love them so much and I love this life that we're on and how we're trying to walk through this pathway .

I feel so blessed to be able to share some of my stories with people because I hope in some way , shape or form , it uplifts you too and it makes you think that even if you think you're alone that you're not , you don't need an abundance of people to walk you through , you just need one .

And even if you don't have that one person and this I do remember as a kid as well then you find it in other ways . You find it in a favorite movie , or you find it in a favorite song you love , or you find it in a piece of literature that you read over and over and over again . I used to read the Alchemist I still do and the Prophet .

I used to read these books over and over and over again because they gave me such strength , they gave me such possibility and for a while there they were the only things I could hold on to . And you walk yourself through the moments of hardship and you find your way through , and then you make yourself available to other people until you find your people .

You find your people , because we all have people . We all have the ability to have people . So , anyways , patti and I love you so much . To the Martins , who I've loved my whole life , thank you for having me and for letting me be part of your life and this moment , and I will always be here for you , no matter what .

And to all of the Martins friends and families and all the people I met and all the people whose names I forgot that had met before . Thank you for your hugs and your love and your acceptance and your joy .

And listen to everyone else out there who is listening to the podcast that drops usually . I didn't realize people were listening to it on Sunday mornings at 6am . But thank you , I appreciate you so much and I will always try to even just write a little five minute thing of something like this happens again . I'll do a little audio version as well .

I didn't think anyone would even miss it . So thank you for your understanding and my apologies , and for those of you who are visiting us on the live stream , thank you so much . Thursday nights , 6pm Pacific time , and I am just grateful to be here . So have a blessed and beautiful day . And yeah , I really , really mean it in this moment .

Please remember , it really is all about the joy . Thanks for stopping by . All about the joy Be better and stay beautiful folks . Have a sweet day .