¶ All About the Joy Online Store
Okay , cool , how are you guys ? Hi everybody , welcome to All About the Joy Cynthia's in the house . Rick Costa , I think we did our intro correctly . Okay , I'm having issues , though , because I need us to flip . I need to move you over . I was having issues right there . Cynthia , how are you ? I'm good . Yeah , I love your hair out .
I was saying that earlier in the green room that I know you don't love wearing your hair out . I don't know why .
Well , today's a little messy Like . Even my coworker was like are you okay ? You look a little frazzled .
Really , the first thing I thought was I like it .
Thank you . Thank you , rick . Thank you , hey Melanie , how are you ? That's exactly right , rick . I always say that , like I love when she wears her hair out . Now I'm the opposite .
I like my hair to be like this big Cynthia hates when my hair is , cause she's seen and people at work this week have seen my hair Cause it was like out like this but I always take a shower and my hair's like half wet or whatever .
But I like it bigger , like as big as possible , like you can hide things in it . You know that was like in the 80s , remember the 80s , everybody had their hair ginormous .
If you saw me this past week at work , I tame it down here so I could be , you know , a little conservative . But yeah , rick , how are you doing ? How ? How was your week ?
Doing good , doing good . I actually got mom to bed earlier this time , so I was more relaxed coming to the broadcast . Okay , we can relax and chill and not be trying to hurry up .
I just feel bad . I appreciate you because you always come on the show and I know that's a tricky time for you . So thank you so much for doing that . And I'm also going to say this , and I know I'm a little embarrassed , but I cannot believe people keep buying stuff from our store . I don't know who bought stuff today .
So I did get an inquiry from somebody I know . Rick is all about the joy everywhere on his thing . You're so beautiful , thank you . I don't have your addresses . I don't get any of that information . Somebody asked if I can see their address and their credit card . It's going through a third party , so please know everything you do is secure . Whatever .
All I get is the amount of things that people bought . So I know today we sold two V-neck t-shirts and then they tell me when it's going to ship and the percentage and whatever . Blah , blah , blah . I just want everyone to know that . But thank you for supporting the show and it is a cool logo . Anyways , all about the joy .
It's a cool saying and I just I'm thrown .
So thank you so much yay I think on my site the one that I use all I see is their email address . That's it .
That's all I can see yeah , but don't you get information on what you've sold ? Because that's what I do . I don't even get an email address .
I'm saying any personal information . All I see is their email and that's it .
I don't see your address . You know what ? I don't even get an email .
I don't get an email , but if I log in I can see so-and-so email , their email address , and they ordered blah , blah , blah .
Oh , that's cool . You know what ? I don't even . I told you I haven't even set up the . I shouldn't say this , but I haven't even set up . I didn't . I haven't set up the bank thing to transfer the money over . So the money's still sitting up . So maybe that's when I get that . Why do you need the email ?
I guess to thank them , you can always send a little personal Thank you , yeah , yeah , yeah . No , I don't think there's anything nefarious about this is just my first time doing this or whatever but I just get an email that says you've sold two more shirts and this is when it'll ship and this is what your percentage or whatever .
you know what I mean yay why are we yaying for the audio people ?
because melanie , our favorite , most important , fabulous person , who's always on our show , always comes in and supports the show . I got her a mug and then she bought a t-shirt because we wanted to say thank you in a nice , kind way . But she also bought a t-shirt from us and we just appreciate you . Thank you so much , melanie . That's so funny .
I love that . Yay , it is a cool mug and I hope to have more sayings and more things in the future . Again , it's all about time . But yeah , someone has warned me that christmas is coming up and I should have mugs with different colors and stuff . And I'm like , okay , yeah , this took me nine months to set up . You know what I mean ?
I can't imagine doing the mug Very slow .
Very slow Now that you say that for Christmas time . I think the most one thing that people do get for Christmas from my store is mugs .
Yeah , and All About the Joy is a cool mug to give people . If you could get different colors , I totally get it and I would love to do it and I would love to do it and I'm thinking about it . I just yeah .
I'm just going to be honest , not sure it's going to happen , unless some really cool benefactor jumps in and I will pay you your salary and all you have to do is worry about all about the joint , which is the dream . Oh , look at Melanie's over here designing .
I think we need Melanie Melanie's in the chat telling us we need to do a green mug with red lettering .
Okay , Actually that would be great , and for our Hanukkah people it could be the white mug with blue lettering .
Okay , so I see we have Cynthia and Melanie as designers , okay .
Now what about Kwanzaa , if we're going to go crazy ? Just kidding .
Okay , yeah , anyway you might just have to get the regular mug . All about the joy . This year might just be the simple regular mug . No , I get it . We'd like to expand . We'll think about it .
We'll see . Put a candy cane in there .
Yeah , it's all about the joycom . The store is on the website . Check it out . Support the show . We really appreciate you . Thank you , thank you . Okay , I want to see if I can show this TikTok video that spurred my wanting to talk about this subject . For those of you who have very sensitive ears and don't like bad words , this is your warning .
He says very bad words , okay , but it is what spurred what the conversation is going to be about today .
Hide your kids . Hide your kids .
Hide your children . It says like the F word . He does say the N word too , but anyway , it doesn't matter , it's not a big deal , just give me all the hands up . And it's Dion Cole . You guys will .
¶ Aging and Respect
Cynthia , I think I was with you when you came here to visit you , and Juan , and I think this is who you saw get out of the Bentley , and I think you were like oh , I think he's famous , I'm not sure , but it's Dion Cole , he's from Black-ish . Okay , let me see if I can do this .
Oh he got like that deep voice .
You gonna see him . Oh , I know who that is it's 30 seconds Now let's see if I can do this .
I think I'm all good you got Young women that's in here . Do a lot of older men hit on you ? Yes , here's a very smooth way to get an older man off you , real smooth . All right , next time I hold the dude , come on you and be like , hey , sweet thing , how you doing baby . All you gotta say is I'm okay , mister .
Shut down the whole operation , mr the fuck .
Nah , baby , don't do that to me . Nah , don't do that to me . My name Gregory . Call me Gregory , okay , mr Gregory , mr Gregory , mr Gregory , this is stupid , this is stupid bitch .
It made me think of the color purple .
Oh , my God , Isn't that hilarious , that's funny , that's awesome . So it made me start thinking about aging . Because these words it made me start thinking about it , because I used to get really upset when people would say ma'am to me as I was getting older . That's how you know you're turning a corner . You know what I mean . You're turning a corner .
People start saying ma'am . Now one of my favorite clients and this is true , she knows she's my favorite client , she knows it . She's from Texas and her children . When I first met them if I'm ever at the home office when I first met them , they would come in the room and they'd call me Ms Carmen , and I'd be like , oh , you could just call me Carmen .
And they always say yes , ma'am , no ma'am . They're that Southern politeness , you know what I mean . And I was like just call me Carmen , you don't have to call me . And she came running . I mean she like knocked over stuff .
She's like ah , ah , ah , ah ah .
She's Carmen . Saying ma'am is the proper way , that is a thing of respect , that is an honor . You're their elder . That's what we do , that's how we do things . You need to see it more . And we had this whole conversation and I started thinking about ma'am being like queen .
You know what I mean being something that isn't Because we always associate it with being old , as opposed to being a thing of respect and honor . You know what I mean . So it changed my mind about that . But anyways , I sent you guys some questions about aging and that's where it came from . Wasn't that funny , mr .
I remember in church likei would sometimes have to deal with kids and stuff . I have kids , church stuff or whatever , and like here's mr rick and I'm like , mister , why you make me old ?
like it just felt weird , but you get over it I think if you switch your mind , mr and miss , don't bother me as much . But when you get called ma'am , I don't know about you , cynthia , but being called ma'am is like I think you know gray-haired old lady I was like we don't need to be all like that .
That's just like in Spanish , when you say doña , doña , yeah .
That might hurt if somebody said it in Spanish . I need time . I just got through the madam thing . You know what ?
I mean .
That would definitely hit a whole other way .
Did someone say doña to you ?
Oh , one person did and I was like oh , I was like what ?
How old were they , though ? Like six .
No , they were younger than me . But the reason why they said it ? Because they were like but you're married now ? And I said yes , I'm married , but I'm not that old .
Well , see , here's the thing Her kids at the time they're still pretty young , but they were like five and six , so it's okay .
But I will admit to an embarrassing situation where I was in the grocery store always in the grocery store my eyes are always wandering too , by the way , always looking at the fine man in the grocery store , you know what I mean and I was checking out this fine boy .
He was so good looking and I was like damn , and his body and everything , whatever , and he like passed by me or whatever , and he's oh , excuse me , ma'am , and I was like ma'am my brother ain't looking at me at all .
He's not looking through you , you know what I mean .
So the age matters , like a guy in his 30s calling me ma'am is so much different than a 10 year old .
You know what I mean right , yeah , so melanie is asking . She says that sounds bad , what it ? Are you asking about the ?
word doña oh doña .
Yes , cynthia , sorry . Doña is like saying señora in Spanish yeah , but it's for say . For instance , you would say señora to your mom , but to your grandparent you would say doña . It's like a ranking , basically Very formal , very formal , very .
Yeah , eld , you would say Doña , it's like a ranking , very formal , very formal . Elders , it's like ma'am , but ma'am is for everybody , doña is for the old .
I was going to say Doña for me , feels even older .
This is wrong . This might not be a good subject . I'm feeling really old right now . But the first question was what are some things that make you feel old ? So I think we talked about some of those , but , cynthia , do you have another one ? You said you did your homework , girl .
Oh yes , Back pains and joint pains . Yeah , you were starting to tell me in the green room . What happened ? Oh my God . So lately I've been having a pain in my right knee , like going up and down stairs , because I've been trying to do the stairs more .
Man , I always have to hold on to the railing because I feel like it's going to buckle and I'm just going to go flying down the stairs .
Is that like a new thing , or is that something you've always had ?
Is that a new thing ? Yeah , um , it's probably been like that for about a month or so now .
Yeah , rick , what about you ?
I mean that too . For me , like the body isn't what it used to be , that's for sure . Like I hurt my right knee , as we all know , like from a while back from the stupid wasp incident , but then the other day my left knee hurt and I was like wait , I didn't hurt that knee . Why is this knee hurting like I don't like ?
this because you're putting pressure on your other knee while you're trying to heal the first knee that got hurt by the wasps I guess so and again . I just need to say if you ever encounter more than one flying thing in your car , i'm'm just saying it's probably a nest somewhere . I'm just going to throw that out there .
I thought when you told the story it was just one .
Nope , it was a swarm .
¶ Aging and Staying Young
I will say , oh wait , let's see what Melanie said .
Melanie just said , scrolling for the year you were born on an online application is not oh , I know what you mean kind of like add yourself to something and they're like , and it's like 1990 , 1970 , I feel like 1970 , scroll , scroll , it's weird . That is a big one , oh my god sympathy pain oh , sympathy . Pain , rick , yeah , ricky .
Why is so your , is your knee the big problem , now the other knee , or are you feeling better ? No , no , no , no it was just a one-time thing .
It's pretty much better than the right knee . It's just once in a while if I twist a little bit weird , I'm like oh yeah , there it is again , but it's pretty much bad . I could do everything . I walk , I can lift , I can do everything . Up and down stairs was the worst thing , but I'm fine now .
The other thing I was gonna say was when kids are talking about stuff and I ain't got a clue what they're talking about , and I'm like what is you even talking about ? they're like oh you so old you don't even know this . I'm like I have no idea what you're talking about .
Or if I say something like , oh , I remember when I recorded that my vcr what's a vcr ?
yeah , that's so weird . Okay , I will admit something that happened today . It wasn't today , it was yesterday . There was a . Okay , everyone knows I love george michael . Don't even talk about george michael , because that it'll be over .
I will fly wherever you are and slap you upside the head it's like friends and freddie , mercury , aretha and whitney , those and Whitney , those are my people . Okay , so I told I've been there but Jonas Brothers or somebody . Jonas did a cover of Careless Whisper and I'm so sorry , horrible . And I was like who is this Jonas person ?
Like the looks I got from people in the office was like what . I don't know who this Jonas person is , but this is a horrible rendition of Carol's Whisper . I don't care , do not be messing with my . And that's when I feel old , because I realize I guess I should know who Jonas is .
It's three brothers . Three brothers , yeah , jonas brothers .
Clearly I'm older than both of you . I don't even know who they are . Is there a song I would know .
That I can't tell you because I don't really listen to it .
I can't even think of the song right now . But they're like a band , like a boy band and whatever .
Together and song . Yeah , they do together , they do solo . I think they start off with kid shows like a Nickelodeon thing , did they ?
Yeah .
Yeah , this show is definitely sponsored by AARP . That's so funny .
Okay , what makes you feel young Me ? It's keeping up with all the musicians and shows that these kids watch , and I actually know what they're talking about that keeps you young .
I think so . Okay , what do you mean ? Like knowing who the Jonas Brothers is ? Okay , I'm saying it wrong . It's like when people say the Facebook , right . You're like oh God , yeah , okay , how do you say it ? You don't say the Jonas , it's Jonas Brothers . Oh , just Jonas Brothers . Okay , sorry . And you guys can't name one hit song .
So clearly they're really good .
That's not my thing .
That damn song is in my head though , that other song of gonna shake , shake , shake , shake , whatever the Taylor . Swift song , that's on every meme on TikTok . Now , shake it off , shake it off . I don't think I've ever heard a song from Taylor Swift . I can't get that one out of my head Melanie's . I even know that Jonah's brothers are a boy band .
Don't ask me to name a song , no .
Okay , we all know who they are . We can't say what the songs are , though I can't help you , Rick .
what makes you feel young ?
I think I'm going to say similar to what Cynthia said . When I know stuff that other people just you don't know that , it makes me feel like I'm in the know . And are you old ? Why you don't know that I don't know .
Yeah , I don't know if there's anything that makes me feel young . I'll be honest with you . I was just telling Cynthia , when we were in the green room , that one of the things that's bumming me out is no , everyone knows , I like to work out , or I used to .
Now I can't seem to get myself together to do it consistently , but I've always had , like , my arms . You know , I work out with my arms , whatever , and they always look good , but now I can't even lift . I can't lift because of my wrist . I'm having issues you know what I mean , right , so I'm feeling really old with that .
I used to feel really young because I would feel like I could beat most people running , you know what I mean . And so now I've not . I don't have that right now either , and I'm wearing a brace and I'm like it's just all bad . So I don't know if there's anything that's making me feel really young lately . Yeah , I don't know .
It's tough .
Maybe when I go get my Botox and then I'm like oh my God , I don't know , that's when I feel really young , but yeah , no , I don't have anything else . How old do you actually feel If you had ? To give it a number .
Depends on if you mean physically or mentally .
It's two different things , exactly . Let's go with both All right , go ahead , Cindy .
Physically , I probably feel like I'm in like 70s or 80s . Mentally , I feel like I'm in my like late 20s , early 30s . Really , mm-hmm , rick , in my late 20s , early 30s , really .
Rick .
Physically , let's say , I'll give it a number . I don't know Probably what I am . To be honest with you , physically , mentally , I'm still a kid . I never grew up . I'm a Toys R Us kid , that kind of thing .
God , why are we all opposite today ? I feel it's like you against me , all it , like both of you against me . I'm like the opposite . I will say this I feel , even though I'm not fit as I was before I'm not , and I could certainly lose 20 pounds easily I have never loved my body and my presence more .
I know , know that's weird , but I've never been more comfortable with my skin , with my body . It's like you don't give a shit , I don't care . This is it , this is it right here ? That's all I got . I'm not stressed about it anymore .
I'll be honest , I've never really been stressed about my body or my weight , but it was always because I was being compared to white women that I danced with , which I could never compete with that , so it was not an issue . Do you know what I mean ? It wasn't an issue because I mean it could have been , but it wasn't for me , but it wasn't for me .
But I think that's kind of one of the things that's really interesting . And then in my head I feel like you were saying mentally I feel like I am and this people are going to be like oh , please , comment . But I feel like I have such wisdom now I handle things better .
Like I don't have these temper tantrums Like I remember when I was younger , like if somebody would do something that I hated , or if somebody hurt somebody else , I would , you know , I'd behave correctly in the presence of other people , but then I would have like a fit , I would cry , I would be so upset .
I've had like in my room or whatever , by myself , I'd be freaking out . And now things don't bother me anymore . So Melanie just said , mentally I'm in my 20s , physically 40 ish . Yeah , yeah . So I see , I feel like I'm the reverse , and I'm not trying to be controversial . I really was thinking about this .
I just feel like I wouldn't want to go back to my 20s . I've said this before . I want to see how the hell this ends . I want to see how this path goes . I have worked too hard , way too hard when I was young .
I remember people saying to me though , like that , I have an old soul , because the things that would kids would be like all excited about . I'm like , yeah , that's boring to me .
We tell all children that though you know that , right , I'm sorry , rick , you do . You have an old soul . I don't even know what that means , but you know , we tell all kids this , right , okay , what does ?
it mean to have an old soul Like you probably have a conversation with old people and it's like normal . It's not even weird . It would be like even though you're a child you're having like a deep conversation with old people as if you're old too .
Okay , I wasn't there when you were younger , so I don't know . I'm not trying to diss you . I'm just saying I've said that so many times to all my nieces and nephews and it's all bullshit Like from my mouth to them Because I'll be like you . You are so mature , you're like an old soul , you could handle this better .
Baby See , that's the way I was working through some issues with my children . Oh , speaking of kids , isn't it Emily's birthday today ? It is . It is Emily's birthday . Emily Harris . Happy birthday . Oh no , what's her last name ? It's not Harris , it's Pinto , emily Pinto's birthday today . So happy birthday to her .
If she watches the show , I did send her a text this morning before . Cynthia's all like whatever . Okay , so now do you feel um like if you were talking to a 15 year old today , rick ? What would you tell them about ? What aging is like , what ?
would you say to them ? Well , one thing I've always said , and a lot of them would argue with me , is the more you know , the more you find out you don't know . And they're like that sounds so stupid . Like literally have people arguing me , that sounds so stupid .
I'm like you ain't there yet , you'll figure it out , but it's true , the more you know , you like wow , I don't really know as much as I like , because we all think we're so smart when we're teenagers . Oh my , you don't understand , dad . Yeah , because they were never teenagers .
Come on for real so yeah , that's one thing I'd be like , really seriously , you don't know everything . You think a lot , but you really don't they're not gonna believe you either either . No , they're not , they're not . They got to learn the hard way .
I want to share what Melanie just said . She said who says to younger people when I was your age ? Oh my God , I try never to say that , but I've said it so many times .
Everybody says it .
And isn't it weird when you catch yourself , because you remember that's what grown-ups used to say , and now you're saying it and you like that's not what I meant to say , but it is what I meant to say , because you're not going to understand yeah melanie says what keeps me young is keeping up with technology .
Okay , that's good I was just yelling at rick in the green room because he was acting like I didn't know what the vpn was . I'm like , um , yeah , that's a good one .
I think a lot of people and I say this about people I love in my life who are older , who think it's funny to call themselves is it Ludwig , ludwig , is that what you say when you're somebody who doesn't know how to use computers , you're not up with technology . I think it's called Ludwig or whatever . Alden says it all the time about himself .
They think it's called Ludwig or whatever Alden says it all the time about himself . They think it's funny . And I'm like I actually don't think that's a funny thing . You should be keeping up with technology to the best of your ability .
¶ Embracing Aging With Gratitude
One of my clients , their grandmother , is 101 . This year just turned 101 . Child she always on her phone texting people . I'm like 101 .
Yeah texting people . I'm like 101 .
That's great . I crack up when people at work be like what's your fax number ? I'm like , are you for real Fax ?
Why do we still have faxes , though ? I don't know .
I love it when people are like what's a fax machine ?
Yeah , then I heard about these blowing up pagers . I'm like like there's still pagers out there who has pagers , that's what I'm saying ? Did you hear about the whole in the middle east ? A whole blowing ?
up pager thing .
I'm like we still got pagers . People still use these things .
Well , I mean doctors still use them .
I'm sorry , cynthia , doctors still use pagers that makes sense to me , though , because they can't pick up the phone , yeah melanie just said oh , because she , melanie's comfortable with both apple and android . I got you . Yeah , apple and android are just .
I'm not a big apple person , but it's just funny how apple people get so indignant and it's like coke and pepsi really not a big deal to me , like whatever , but that's a whole other conversation .
Yeah , I think the other thing about like whenever I tell gen z anything , I feel that they smirk because they're doing that thing , like , like what you were saying , yeah , okay , whatever old person you don't really know , but I'm gonna listen to you and pretend I'm giving you respect , but I'm really not . That's the thing that makes me feel old .
I would say , you know what I mean , because I know that they're doing the thing that they , because they do think they know more than we do , like we weren't ever their age . And now what I realize is I just don't say nothing now , I just wait , because it's going to happen .
You're going to figure it out the hard way , because all I need is to be disrespected once and then we're done . I'm out . I ain't got no children for a reason .
Baby , that's what I'm saying , like I used to say to my son , you don't know how lucky you are because you have the internet . You can just look up literally anything . I had to go find it in an encyclopedia . What's an encyclopedia ?
But see , our parents used to say the other things too . Right , you don't know how easy you have it . I used to have to walk five miles to school or whatever it is . To the library , but we're doing the same thing . It's just every generation does this . It's so weird .
Yeah , it's true , it is true .
Yeah , how does age work for you in the workplace ? Oh wait , I didn't ask Cynthia . About what would you tell someone who's 15 .
Oh , a Gen X . Now About getting old they're Gen Z , you're Gen X , they're Gen Z . Oh , sorry About getting old , that when you're in your 30s , your body's going to start to give you warning signs . Really , yeah , you got to start feeling little things here and there , and then , once you hit 40 , that's when you start feeling the pain .
Okay , wait , really , yeah , I don't know . Can we maybe say for some people For some , I guess . For some people . I don't know , can we maybe ?
say for some people , for some , I guess For some people .
I'm just saying Well , because I think it's going to be different . For look , I think there are some things that definitely happen to all people , men and women . Wrinkles happen , they're going to happen , live with it . Sagging things happen . Things start to sag . That never sagged before . You know what I mean . That's gravity , you know .
Like whatever , I got to be quiet because I know I'm going to wake up tomorrow and be like my knees , my back . Actually what Cynthia just said absolute truth .
Yes , that's exactly and there's not , and there's not a lot that we can do about it . You can try to be fit and exercise and all that , but outside of that , what can you do ?
no , but that's a good thing . So so here's what I want to do , because I think this is really an important part of it too . I think we've also been socialized to believe that aging is bad and aging is decrepit and declining , and so this is going to sound like I'm , you know , again so full of wisdom .
I think because there was a time I didn't think I'd see my next birthday . I love my birthday . I make a big deal out of my birthday every year because I see it like another year accomplished Right . Most of my friends are always like , oh , don't remind me , I don't want to talk about Nobody wants to get older , because we see it as some negative thing .
And I always saw it the opposite , like , wow , I made it another year . Always saw it the opposite , like wow , I made it another year . And I think that's also what made me so excited , because I remember when I was little , thinking about like my dream . It's still my dream today .
I want to be like 65 , 70 , sitting on my porch of my beautiful ranch house after being so successful . I better get on this shit quick , being able to look out at all the land I own .
TikTok .
TikTok .
I know , but this is what I'm saying , right , next time , making those cups in other colors .
I'm going to be out working ceramic and shit doing it myself painting . But it's true , I've always had that dream that I wanted to see myself get older , and I think a lot of it was because my mother didn't make it . You know what I mean ?
I never saw my mother get older and I realized as I got older that she was so young you start to realize how young she was when she passed away .
So I think that , for me , has worked in my favor , in that I get excited about getting older , but I get it because it is a change , but I want to put a spin on it to see if we can't make it a more positive thing . So what is a positive thing about aging ?
I was thinking about this today . It wasn't even anything to do with the whole topic because I already knew , but I think it makes me feel privileged to still be here , because there's a lot of people that are younger than me that just died , that have died Family members of . My cousin was 34 .
I was 33 and she died from cancer and I thought because here in my mind , I'm like we're going to grow old , your kids are going to play with my kids and they're going to have kids and they're going to play together . And I was like , nope , none of that's happening now . Wow , it's like a privilege .
I don't take life for granted because we don't have an expiration date . We don't know Healthy people not to be morbid , but healthy people could just drop dead , healthy athletes . So I think it's a privilege it's not , it's a privilege that we're still here .
I love that .
Yeah , I don't take it for granted because we don't know when our time is up . Nobody knows . So it is a privilege . If you're still here , use the time you have and don't waste it . I was telling my friend yesterday because right now he's unemployed and I was like I really could kick myself .
There was a time where I didn't work for quite a while , I was on employment and now I look back and I'm like you could have did so much .
Yeah , but don't do that . That's not fair . That's not fair to do that .
But I'm just saying . I'm just saying that time is so valuable Like we need to understand that .
do what you can yeah , I agree with you . But what I don't want to do because I think this is the lie we tell ourselves you do the best you can . When you're in that moment , you do the best you can . When you're in that moment , you do the best you can with what you have in front of you .
Being unemployed sucks , I don't care how much time it gives you . It's hard not to have a paycheck . It's hard not to know how you're going to pay the bills , feed somebody . You don't take care of stuff . I don't want us to then romanticize like oh my God , I should have built a business when I was unemployed . That makes sense , you know what I mean .
Like I had so much time I should have done . No , you were probably sad , depressed , whatever . That's why I'm going to stop .
That's why I'm shutting down . But the lesson is if that ever happens again . Now I know better .
And depending on the circumstances , because if you were unemployed and you didn't know if you'd be able to make your next mortgage or food on the table , I don't know how up you'd be to like you know what I'm starting business . I'm going to do this . Maybe you would , I don't know . But I look at I don't do well when I'm sad and depressed , I just don't .
I know there are people out there , a lot of artists , who are like they're alcoholics , they're in and out of rehab and they're like creating artwork and it becomes amazing . But I'm not that person . I need things to be okay for me to be able to create stuff . So I'm just trying to give you a little bit of a pass .
Unemployment sucks , and so I want the best for your friend to get another job or to get a blessing of a lot of money from somewhere to stabilize . Now that's what I'm going to pray for you . I want you to get a lot of money so you don't have to work , so then you could go do all the things you want to do during your free time that you now have .
See , you got to be very specific with the Lord . That's what I remember . You don't want to say you know what God next time I'm unemployed ? He might only hear that part .
I do believe being specific is important .
Being very specific , being very specific how does age work for you guys in the workplace ? I'll start with this one . I'm going to start with this one . Let me tell you . Let me tell you something , and this I know I'm going to be in my 70s and 80s , god willing if I am blessed to live that long .
¶ Adapting to Technology in the Workplace
Okay , my experience is right now that people who are not keeping up with what is going on , like Melanie said , with technology or whatever , if you are not going to keep up with what's going on in the world and in technology , then you're not going to make it in the workplace . You're just not .
Yeah , I am happy to retire as soon as motherfucking possible , so I don't care , like . If I have the money , I don't . I'm not gonna work , I'm good , I live a very simple life , like I don't . But there are people that keep working for my clients and my clients are very loyal .
I work with very good people too much , no matter how much I complain about them on this show especially . But I don't work with people I don't like . But they have people that they have worked with for 30 , 35 years and I'm like . Okay , as much as I appreciate , you've had this landscaper for 35 years .
Okay , the reason why the lawn isn't getting mowed is because he can't get on the tractor , whatever it is , whatever it is . So either suck it up and be okay with it , because then we have to hire somebody else like I don't or fire them and let them go .
Those are your choices , but you can't keep complaining about it to me and my one of my clients is really mad at me . I'm like I don't care , I'm done , I don't care . Fire them or pay them and just be okay with it and hire somebody else like you you have choices is really mad at me .
I'm like I don't care , I'm done , I don't care , fire him or pay him and just be okay with it and hire somebody else . You have choices .
As they say , the definition of insanity doing the same thing over and over but expecting a different result .
Go ahead , isn't that Einstein ?
I can't remember .
That is Einstein . Yes , it is . Yes , that is the definition of insanity . I'm going to bring that up . Thank you for reminding me . I'm going to bring that up Because I'm going to cut the check every time .
I'm going to cut that check , you're going to sign it and then I have to listen to 35 minutes as to why we have to then hire somebody else to come in and actually do the work , or , oh my God , you can mow the lawn yourself . That's always an option . There's , there are so many options . So weird .
yeah , yeah , okay , okay I'm just saying I , I think in the workplace that's my issue with age and I don't want to have ageism , but in my head I'm like at some point , yeah no , it's very true , because at my old job was me and this 76 year old woman both working at the desk , and anytime her computer would crash or anything like that , she would ask me
to help her with it or she didn't understand something , always asked me . She said you should work for it , and I'm like hell . No , because I hate computers , but I have to learn it for work . You know what I mean . Like you have to know the technology as much as I hate technology , but it was always that thing , like there was a .
There's such an age gap between me and her that she will not learn new technology .
But you know what ? It's so weird Cause I Andrea is going to be mad if she listens to this , but I don't think she listens to the show regularly . But I'm just saying , One of the things that bothers me about Alden and Andrea is they're both so resistant to social media , Like Andrea used to have . She don't use social media at all . She don't whatever .
And I'm like this is what's going to happen . Exactly what you're talking about is what's going to happen , Because technology is what is the substance of what we're doing in the world right now ? It is all about online . And actually Hayden , who we're going to have on the show next week , his film festival what am I calling it ?
The film festival that he does is online , so he has a software program , whatever . And Hollywood is having a really tough time with a lot of things because of streaming services or whatever . And look , we're having a show that people watch and it's online . You know what I mean ?
It's not like we're sitting at a television or going to a movie theater , Like everything's moving this way . So I always get really nervous , but there's a weird kind of I don't have to learn that shit , I don't do social media . I'm like okay , I'm not just saying it about Andrea .
I get what you're saying , but think about it .
During the pandemic , everybody had to learn how to use Zoom .
Because that's how you had your meetings , that's how you worked . So she had to learn that technology , and now she has . Obviously she uses it .
So you have to know the technology , anything new that's coming out , but I think there's a resistance that happens that it's in , and I'm not just saying andrea alden does the same thing . There's a weird kind of I don't need if it's like it's below you . You know what I mean . I'm like , okay , I look at andrea's gonna fucking scream and yell at me .
I just already know when I said andrea , I meant another andrea , not the one that's on the show . I mean , look at it , andrea's going to fucking scream and yell at me . I just already know when I said Andrea , I meant another Andrea , not the one that's on the show , it's Andrea Smith . We love you , andrea .
She's going to be so mad at me , but it is that same thing . It frustrates me because it's not that I care whether or not she uses social media or not . I'm just like this is basic stuff we're talking about .
Just picturing her going . Carmen , the one time I listened to the broadcast I'm going to let her watch the part where you just made fun of how she talks . I wasn't trying to really imitate her . You need to get rid of that , rick .
That's what she's going to say Like the expression that people use all the time , and I just go , why you can't teach an old dog new tricks , but I just go why ?
Right , because the dog don't want to learn . That's all I'm hearing .
I don't know , like why , if you had to like the pandemic , like I almost said , linda Cynthia said I don't know where Linda came from , but yeah , if you had to , then guess what All of a sudden you can Wow , I don't know .
We were using Zoom way before that , but I guess more people had to learn how to use it . Zoom's been a business device for a long time , but I hear what you're saying . I think for me too .
I feel like when I think about my mom and what she missed out on , like even the simple things like a microwave , a VCR , like we didn't have all those things going up . That would be so shocking and I don't want to miss out on whatever's coming next . I think it's so fascinating . You know , everyone's afraid of AI .
I learned something about AI the other day that did freak me out . Someone said AI is not a tool , and I can't remember what they were saying , but it really freaked me out and made me see AI in a different light .
So maybe we'll have a conversation about AI at some point in the future with somebody who's much more of an expert on it , because it taught me something I didn't think about before . But AI is the thing now that we're going to start dealing with that we're already dealing with and to not be aware of how that's going to affect us .
I think that's what makes you old is when you stop learning and you stop engaging , and I think it's a facade that you get older and then you stop learning . I think you should continue learning , continue trying to . It's not that hard . You just got to be in the know . Now I don't know all of the young singers .
I do not , because it's not my music the Shake it Off song with the Taylor Swift . I really like Taylor Swift , who she is and how she presents herself , but I don't know her music . You know what I mean , but that song is a meme now . So Melanie says I don't like AI .
And now the new laptops they're automatically shipping them with AI built in already . So it's like now . You can't even avoid it .
So let me just say something AI has been around for a long time , so that's the number one thing . You should all know . The you know any time that you know it's just different kind of iterations of AI . You guys AI , siri is AI . What do you think Siri is ?
You know what I mean when you guys are using that on your iPhone or whatever , or you're calling on Amazon whatever the Amazon was , alexa or whatever all those things .
Everybody's . Alexa just said yes . How can I help ?
you . I clearly don't have Alexa but I don't have the other one either , but I just all it's all been iterations of it . Melanie just said I think someone's spying on you today , Sue . I don't want you to think like that .
If you have this , you are already . If you have a smartphone .
No , if you live in the United States and you have a home with windows , it's already happening . We have drones everywhere , we have satellites , but don't think about it as a negative thing , right ? And I don't think anyone's spying on me specifically
¶ Embracing Artificial Intelligence in Daily Life
. Now here are some things I would suggest . If you're going to change , close your drapes . You know what I mean . Don't like my neighbors across the way . Don't change with the drapes open . Take off your bra and everything , all up in the wind and think none of us are going to see it . You know what I mean .
There are things you can do , but AI has been around for a long time . We're calling it artificial intelligence now out loud , but computers have been around for a long time and this is where we're going . And here's the good thing . I always say this to you , rick Star Trek next generation . Everyone loves the show , everyone loves that whole concept and idea .
What do you think all of that is ? And if you want me to get you really freaked out , go see 2001 , a space odyssey , which was a movie that came out by stanley kubrick in two , in 1965 , I believe , right way before we were born something . 1965 , and he was already . That was the whole thing was how computers were taking over .
Hal ends up taking over because it's a learning entity . It learns as it goes along , and it learns so much that it starts taking over the ship . That's 1965 . So AI has been around for a long time the concept , the idea and even the processes . I think it's better to learn what's happening and understand it .
That way you can feel more comfortable about it and understand how to protect yourself than to be afraid of it . Melanie , just an idea , just a concept . Idea out there . Rick , what were you going to say ?
I don't remember now .
Okay , great , because I'm happy .
But I do remember again bringing up that movie 2001 A Space Odyssey . Yeah , I'm like , there ain't no way this was made in the 1960s . There ain't no way . Yeah , you're right , you watched it right . So I'm like so if they could do that , then imagine what we could do now .
And it's going to come to a point where they'll go I believe they're going to make TV shows and the entire things will be AI and we're not even going to know the difference .
That's already happening . That's already . I mean , that's why all of the unions are fighting . That's why Gavin Newsom , here in California , just signed something about artificial intelligence and the movie industry . There's a lot of things that are changing , but being afraid of it isn't the best way to .
We can have fear if we take that fear and move it into a channel that is positive and so use that energy to make sure that we understand what's going on , understand how it's going to affect us and move through it . So we get to the side .
Because look at the thing I love about humanity I don't mean to be dorky , I'm being very serious is I love that , no matter what we learn , we want more . You know what I mean . Like , the more we know , the more we want to know more , and that filters throughout all of us . Like the minute I accomplished making $15 an hour , now I want .
I want $20 an hour . You know what I mean . Like , now I want $20 an hour , you know .
I think it's a human thing too , Cause , like when you look at the Olympics or like this record , nobody that's the fastest human . But then somebody comes along , I'm going to beat it , and then they ended up beating it . How ? Cause ?
when you want it , man you're going to do whatever it takes , and that's , I think , what's the best part about the human spirit is the ability to always be progressing forward . Now , I'm not saying it's always positive , I'm not saying it always turns out okay . We can think about the atom bomb and we can think about Oppenheimer , the whole .
You know what I mean . We can think about all the mistakes and bad things that we do , but we still try to progress . Even if we take 10 steps backwards in the process , we always try to progress forward as human beings . Fear is a vile part of who we are as humans .
But the thing I love about fear , whenever I feel it , is I'm like you know what , I'm going to take that and I'm going to make myself courageous . I'm going to find a way to take fear and make it about courage now , and that's all about like fighting through that fear . So I refuse to be intimidated by artificial intelligence .
I've told you before I'm excited about it . I'm intrigued by it . I have this dreamy idea of Star Trek Next Generation sometime happening .
You know what I mean when we live in a world where there's real equality and real substance and all these kind of things we see in the movies , but I also know that it's going to be a tough time learning it and getting through it .
It's not an easy thing and I read a whole article today , which I already said , but we'll talk about it some other time when we have somebody who knows more about it than I do .
But it changed me article today , which I already said , but we'll talk about it some other time when we have somebody who knows more about it than I do .
If you never heard of ChatGPT , you might be old or you might be someone who's not paying attention to artificial intelligence because you have other things going on in your life . So Rick just introduced you to ChatGPT . How do you say it , chatgpt ? Yeah , com , just go there , go check it out . But you don't even have to do that . Google now has AI .
You can also go on your Windows platform . It also has an AI source . I use it . I use this all the time Copilot on MSN on Microsoft . I use it all the time . Copilot on MSN on Microsoft . I use it all the time . What ?
You can make beautiful pictures with it . Just describe what you want .
The pictures are gross . I think the pictures are you can still tell artificial intelligence .
I'll be like beach landscape with mountain in the back . I'll say something like that it's half decent . I can't draw , I think it's cool .
Look it . I use AI to help me with a lot of stuff with editing , with doing the show notes with it gives you a whole template , like I use AI all day long . And here's the thing I bet Melanie does too . She just doesn't realize it . Yeah , there's a lot of it , you know .
Rick said if you have a phone , you're probably using AI , and you don't even realize it . So yeah , wow , what can you do now that you couldn't do when you were young ? Or I'll reverse it what could you do when you were young that you can't do now ? I can't do a split anymore , and let me tell you I'm trying .
I used to be able to do a cartwheel and then land in a split . I used to be able to do a backflip , land in a split . You know what I mean . I don't think I can do a backflip . I'm scared to try . I can still do a cartwheel . I don't know about a backflip , though I need to do some ab work because my tummy's heavy now I don't do a split .
I wish I could say I could even get close .
Can't do a split anymore . I can't run anymore . I used to be able to just stand up and put your leg up . Can't do that anymore . You mean put your leg straight up , I used to be able to split . I used to be able to split . No , not anymore . I'm dying to be able to split . Are you not mad anymore ? I'm dying . I'm like I'm curious .
Listen just real quick I'm trying to take off my bra as a hassle , okay .
When he's going to see Jean-Claude Van Damme do splits . I'm like ouch .
Oh , what the thing is I'm going to get there , though is I'm gonna get there , though I'm gonna get there , I gotta get back there I don't need to do a backflip , but I still should be able to do a split . That shouldn't matter age-wise . That's about flexibility . I just haven't been working on it . It's so sad , rick .
I mean when I was little like what is your split ? Game like well , yeah , I mean never did a split . When I was little , we used to have the playground and all that stuff . I was a little monkey man . I was climbing everything .
Today , no , can't do none of that I ain't doing none of that . I think one of the things that I do better today than when I was younger . I said it earlier I handle situations so much better now . I said earlier , I handle situations so much better now . Melanie just said I see AI popping up on apps . Try to get away from its input . Yeah , you can't .
You're already using it . I understand the fear , but I want you to work through that fear , melanie . Yeah , google , all of it is AI .
And they're keeping track of everything you type .
Sorry , yeah , but okay , okay , but stop . That's been happening all along , that's not that's what I'm saying oh okay , that's just what I'm saying . Oh okay , yeah , yeah , everything is already out in the web , if , okay , if you use an atm or a debit card at your atm machine to get money out , they already have all your information on the internet .
If you do any online banking at all , all your stuff is already on the internet . If you do any online banking at all , all your stuff is already on the internet . If you do anything with a social you just said earlier that you don't put in your birth date when you have to scroll your stuff is already on the internet . It's already out there . It's just .
How do you learn to protect yourself is really what we need to do .
Okay , what's your ?
split game . You didn't , no , I said , said I can't .
I've never done a split .
I can't do a split Never never .
But I was going to say now I lost it , that's okay , that's a problem , I did memory have you always had that though .
Not like today . I keep cutting you off and changing the subject , so that's why you get in confusion .
Yeah .
There were certain things I think that I believe are folk tales or lies that we've been told . But then people do it anyway . So older people fall and have to get their hips replaced . That's like a normal that actually it's been a self-fulfilling prophecy . There's no reason why old people have to fall and get your . You need to break their hip right .
People fall because they're not being careful and then it's a self-fulfilling prophecy Like I really do believe that . Oh my God , okay , I'm gonna have knee problems tomorrow .
I'm a fall you already know what's going to both of us . Like I hate you guys .
You jinxed me y'all did this to me . There's another one that I think is a folktale too . I don't remember what it was .
¶ Positive Aging and Active Lifestyles
I do think if you move it's you're less likely to get hurt . If you're sedentary and you never move at all , you're asking for trouble you gotta keep moving and that's the difference between . I think that's why these people live to 90 and 100 .
If you look at them , they're like they don't sit down and do nothing watch tv , they're moving , they're gardening , they're doing stuff and they're socializing with people , they're eating well , right , that doesn't mean they're having a glass of wine once in a while .
There's what's that ? The guy , this I forgot what it was called . Oh , it is the blue zones . So the blue zones was or is this concept that in certain areas of the world there are people that are centurions , so they're a hundred years plus . And this guy I forget what his name is , but he investigated why these people lived such healthy lives .
So it's not just that they're 100 years old and older , it's that they're 100 years old and they're still got their , they're with it , they got their minds , they're still out there , like Rick said , gardening , they're still doing stuff , they're praying and there were all these kind of common things .
And some of the places are like Sardinia , italy , loma Linda , california here is one of the places Ikaria , greece is another place . Okinawa , japan , nicoya , costa Rica I don't know how to say Nicoya , but I think it's Nicoya .
Those are the places that are the blue zones and the studies have been done and a lot of it has to do with socialization , is a big one , like a lot of people belong to a church or they belong to a social group that they go to on a regular basis . Some people drink wine . They don't eat as much red meat as most they still do but they don't .
They have a lot more plant-based stuff and it's an interesting thing , so you can just go to bluezonecom and check it out .
But yeah , I do think that we have been socialized to believe that getting older is bad and everything is about decline , as opposed seeing what I think are the blessings as we started this show the blessings of being able to live as long as we have and enjoying that and being grateful for it , because so many people don't get that shot .
I would love to be doing this show and we all in our hundreds right well , it would be 90 whatever I saw this video of people in japan .
It was a restaurant in japan and they purposely hired all old people , all senior citizens . And it's like a funny thing too , because they're like now you might mess up your order , so don't get mad , just just laugh and be like thank you , and . But they're like they talk to the people working and they're like oh , I love this , I feel useful again .
Oh , it touched my heart .
Wow . Well , it has to feel useful all along , right , like Miss Joyce , who is my favorite client's grandmother who's 101 , I asked her . I'm like what's the secret ? And she is not kidding . She's like champagne and put a little bit of blueberries in it because it makes it healthy .
So she has champagne every day .
This is not a lie .
She is not lying .
So she has a glass of champagne every day . She puts a little blueberries in it to make it healthy . Okay , it champagne every day and she puts a little blueberries in it to make it healthy . She's just so awesome . But she's with it , she got it . She don't live with no nurse or nothing . She got her own place . Don't get me wrong .
I think having a certain amount of established wealth helps as well . Right , so there's . There is that part of it too , that there might be some correlation between also being able , but these people in the blue zones are not wealthy people . The most important thing seems to be also connection , right Partnerships and marriages and friendships and family and whatever .
It's so fascinating . Wow , hey , this was a fun conversation . I just , rick , you just told me it's an hour . I didn't . I thought we were like 20 minutes in .
Okay .
Just one last question . Is there a time that you would prefer to be at than this moment in time ? Do you look forward to being older or do you wish you could ? I know earlier you said like what your body's felt like and your mind felt like , but do you wish you were a certain age now ?
If I had to give up the wisdom that I have now ?
Cool .
Yeah , I said it earlier , I need to see how the hell this ends . I am not kidding , you know what I mean Just too much sweat and tears . I want to see it . I want to see the end game . So , hey everyone , thank you so much for stopping by . I appreciate it . It's so exciting , cynthia , as always . Thank you , rick , I adore you .
Thank you for stopping by . Please remember a few things . All about the joycom is where you can see where our podcast is . Please follow us on Apple and Spotify . We're also on YouTube . I'm shook by the whole YouTube thing . I'll talk about that at some other point , but check out the live streams there as well . Anyways , thank you everyone for stopping by .
We'll see you again next week and remember , it really is all about the joy . Bye everyone . Thanks for stopping by . All About the Joy . Be better and stay beautiful . Folks . Have a sweet day .