Apples, Peaches, Pumpkin Pie

O two A two O two five. Isn't it make it crazy when people don't do the numbers in the sequence we're used to, Like, if you're given somebody's phone number, out, what's your number? Uh? Eight one eight two six two five one one eight? What wait? Repeat that? Pretty simple? Eight one a two six two five one one eight Hold it, bro, write that down. We're so used to da da da da da da dot dot da da.

I'm kind of dumb, really kind of dumb. Um. Hey, just real quick, anybody's shot that Israel had to bomb Kaza again. Apparently bb Nen Yasuyasun and Yahoo says Hamas hit them first, so now he ordered immediate strikes on them. This happened Tuesday morning. There's never gonna be peace there. Ever, I'm not believing Israel. It's just never gonna be peace there. I don't care what you sign. I don't care if it's carved out with chisels and hammers on a concrete tablet.

It's never gonna be peaceful there. But it sure is fun watching these meetings and well, not fun but interesting, watching all the peace deals and Trump dancing in the Malaysia fun stuff. It is fun. You gotta admit all this is fun. You can get all caught up in the hoop love, you know, the political bullshit that's happening, and the violence in the street and the ice ages. It isn't but it is, like it's so entertaining, just

you know, can't get enough of it. But sometimes I have to and change the channel and just watch some sports or movies. I bailed on the Dodger Toronto game with five minutes before at midnight, and I missed the home run that Freddie Freeman hit to have the Dodgers take a two to one lead. Show Heltani. I can't take how great he is. He's just that this nobody ever been like him. If Aaron Judge can pitch, then maybe we'd have you know, but no, there's never been

a show. Haltani and forget Babe Ruth. I love Baby, I mean I love the the lore of Babe Ruth. But the guy, you know, look, the guy was very overweight, you know, didn't play against black guys, was not a fast runner. No guys the Dominican Republic or Cuba in the league. Back then, nobody threw one hundred. How many times did they have to fly to go cross country? It's a different game, different world. But you know, the Fall Classic, that was quite a game last night, and

Tutsy and KOCHI didn't go good with the picks. We did have Kansas City minus whatever they want minus ten. They won easily, but the over did not hit, nor did the under eight runs hit. In the World Series game, obviously there were nine runs. So once it was tied four to four, I knew no way we could win that bet. So Tuts and Coachy had now six and three on the year and we moved forward. Now to some gossip talk. Oh listen, I'm watching the series on

Netflix Wayward. Have you seen Wayward? Tony Kollett. She runs a very suspicious kind of school boarding school board house for troubled teams up in Vermont. I think it's called Toall Pines. Now. The show takes place in two thousand and three. Not everything's easy to figure out as you're watching this show. I'm not sure why it's two thousand and three, I don't know. But in that year of two thousand and three, we have a transman, that is to say, a woman who was born at birth or

a biological woman who wants to be a man. That's a transman. I know, sometimes it gets confusing non binary gender. This it gets confusing. So a transman that has no top because the actress playing this role had top surgery in a real life years ago. Anyhow, you've got a transman who's married to a pregnant his pregnant wife. Initially you really don't know this. You can't quite figure it out, Like she's pregnant, so does he have a penis? Does she have a penis? That that like, how did she

get pregnant? They don't say that, at least not yet. I'm only up to episode five. In midway through five, there's ten so that's confusing right there. And he's also a deputy sheriff. Okay, and this trans man is played by the female, well again non binary female act transactress named Mae Martin. She is a trans she's a comedian actress. She created the show, also one of the head writers. Like I said, she had top surgery in her real

life a few years back. Again, don't know what she's packing downstairs in real life or the movie, no idea, But more on that mystery in a minute. But did we have trans men and their pregnant wives in two thousand and three, twenty two years ago? I don't think we did, unless they were real hiding someplace up in the hills in different cities or states. I never saw that.

Some ten minutes in and trans man goes to his job as deputy sheriff and his male partner, a real male partner, tells him that, hey, you're just really one of the guys. You'll be one of the guys when they don't worry about it again. Confuse, Okay, all right, nobody was that accepting of it back then. We didn't

know what to make of it back then. Another scene, trans man is lying in bed with his pregnant life who the pregnantiz is very spready for every pretty sexy beautiful blonde, and uh, the wife is rubbing his cheek and he goes, I know, not enough stubble yet it's not really coming in. I guess I need to up my hormones. Okay, all right, so that they're telling you right there, he wants to look she wants to look more like a man. But again, this didn't happen twenty

two years ago. And at one point transman is talking about his body. I gotta go off for a run, hot, I'll be back in a minute. Why you look? Why you look? No, I don't want to get a dad bod again. Dad bob was not an expression twenty two years ago. I don't like that. That's just bad writing. And since she's one of the writers on the show, her and a number of different females, many of whom were gay or trans, I could assure you that they can catch that dad bob. They also make references to

Jack Nicholson with regard to Cuckoo's nest. These are young girls. These are twenty year old, nineteen eighteen year old girls who was forced in a school, and they know about Jack Nicholson in twenty oh three. I don't think so Kucko's Nest was in the seventies. Young girls in their teens did not watch Cucko's newt see this. This bothers me, It just does so I just think I just started

episode six. There's four more ago, very wild, the confusing show, lots of moving parts, and this very confusing angle having to do with the town dealing with millions of toads all over their bucolic liberal town supposed to be Vermont, but they filmed it in Canada. Either way, I think what they, with many Martin was trying to do is bring back the whole Paris Hilton situation. Remember the Paris

Hilton story. Several years ago, she came out and be came well, came out brave enough to talk about her horrifying experience of her parents forcing her to go to one of those schools for troubled teens. Hers was called

Provo Canyon School out in the wilds of Utah. And at one point some years back, Paris testified to a congressional pandle trying to get that the strength and child welfare protections that she said weren't in place and that's why she was force fed medications and sexually abused by the staff while she was institutionalized as a teenager. She told the House Committee of Ways and Means that she'd been violently restrained and dragged down hallways and stripped naked

thrown into solitary confinement. All those things happen on this show, except when they get the tranquilizer shot. They call it butt juice because the needle always goes in their butt. Butt juice, not in the butthole on the cheek. Oh real, quickly back to where we're speaking of buttholes. That you

see the trans man kissing his pretty wife. But at some point with all the craziness angs going on in the confusion, because the wife might be a part of this whole, a bunch of people who are weird whatever they decide, I need you, I need you too. And wife is sitting in his chair with her legs wide open, pregnant and telling Transmn, come here. Transman then crawls on all fours to go to the wife of the chair. Wife gets out of the chair, trans Man lays on

his back. Wife violently flips him over. I'm saying him because he thinks he's a man, but it's a woman. Flips trans Man over, pulls his pants down. You could see trans Man's chair ass cheeks, and I imagine pregnant wife is inserting fingers into trans Man's ass or if there's a vagina down there. I don't know, but you see trans Man moaning in ecstasy, So I don't know what's going on. What hole are we talking about? It's

a fair question. But if these are some of the things that Paris Hilton was looking well this I don't know if all this kind of stuff happened. All she did say she was sexually abused, and if you look at what Paris Hilton went on to do after those horrifying teenage years with the sex tape and sleeping around with so many guys, there was a time where I'll get into the the hold. DiCaprio Leo was after her for a long time and he finally got her pretty well.

But yeah, she was subjected to some really horrible stuff that is portrayed in the series. And basically the fact is that these weren't academies where parents packed up the suburban with a bunch of supplies and everybody took a road trip and hugged goodbye. No, it wasn't like that at all. No, the admission process was basically, well, it was basically parent approved kidnapping, because Paris Hilton's parents and other kids' parents would look on as an unmarked van

would roll up to their home. Four or five people would come out with you know, mass on sche mess. They'd go into the teen's room, whether the parents would tell them what room the teen is in, wake them up with a light in their face, throw a bag a black sheath over their heads, and drag the kid out, screaming and crying and kicking, and everybody's got a leg or an arm, and they get thrown in the van

with that thing on the head. They don't know where they're going, they don't know where they end up, but they end up waking up and they're Actor's place. And this happened to so many kids for so many years. It's very unsettling to see that happened and parents just

sitting by and accepting it. And I remember back in the day when I read up on this, that Paris Hilton's parents looked into four different facilities trying to get her to stop her rebellious behavior, cutting schools, smoking, you know, trying drugs here and there. But even they admit, after she told them her horrifying stories, that they fell for the misleading marketing advice or the whole marketing tools and the catalogs, and they basically fell for the whole troubled

team industry bullshite. I can't imagine what my kids would have to do in order for me to stand by and watch as men with masks jump out of an unmarked car in the morning, four o'clock. Wake her up, wake him up, put a hood over the head, get rid of them. You don't get to say goodbye, you don't kiss in the bite, nothing. How awful is that? And we're not talking about these schools being far and

few between. No, it turns out that this whole, this whole business of trying to correct trouble teams is a fifty billion dollar industry with a B, and that's you know, boarding schools, military style boot camps, juvenile facilities, and then

of course the behavior modification programs. That sounds so scary, That sounds like the place you go in there and never come out, and you meet a bunch of lifers in there who just accept the fact that they're never going to get out, kind of like Girl Interrupted with Venona and Angelina. That was a crazy ass movie. But you know, once Paris came out and shed some light on the Provo Canyon School, of course they came out and said, no, no, no, we can't comment on the

operations or student experience prior to that. We just can't talk about Yeah, okay, but what we can say is that the school provides a structured environment, teaching life skills over catalog bullshit talk. Providing behavioral health be continuing education for youth who come to us who pre existed in complex emotional behavioral with psychiatric needs. The psychos that write this now, I'm not saying there aren't kids who need this kind of help. There are some real troublesome kids.

I saw a video of the other day on Instagram. Remember that nanny show with the lady from England went to the person's house to take care of the kid who was troubled talking to young kids four, five, six, And this mother was so bad trying to get her son to take his juice. He didn't want it. And the kid is he's four. He's smacking his mother in her face, knocking the juice out of her hands, punching her chest. The mother's going now stop that, now, stop that.

And then nanny starts to get involved. She wants to clock this little boy, but she can't. He's spitting on her. He's knocking her in the head. You know, where's the father? Where is the father? You know? I watched her video where a kid, the mother tells his kid, maybe eleven ten, eleven years old, to do this, do that, and the kid's like, mom, okay, chill, Mom says nothing. All of a sudden, you hear a father's voice. What the hell did you say to your mother? Kid gets all nervous,

he stands up, he's like pulling his shirt. What'd you say to your mother? He told it chill, sit down, sit down. Matter of fact, give me fifty push ups right now. I'll tell you what. Stop going now. The kid was doing push ups on the VERGINI and I never got treated that way. But I when I ever talked back to my mother, it was when my father wasn't home. You know, I never cursed her, but I would say, think, oh ma, stop give me, but just stop,

just stop the bullshit. I said stuff like that. We had that kind of relationship, but I wouldn't do it in front of my father. But you know, there's something about a man's voice, a father's voice in the home. And I say this about black kids, and I don't mean to be a prick about it, but it's so true.

You just cannot turn out right without both parents in the home for a significant amount of time or a significant amount of years, or a structure and being reprimanded and even grounded if that was the case, not that I ever did or my kids ever did. I never had to do that, and grounding wasn't even a thing when I was a kid. You just get a hit. I got hit with a newspaper, hit with a wooden spoon,

a deer fum slipper, you know, I got hit. And even though she's said, I'm gonna tell your father all the shit you put me through, AJ, there's going to be a list this long for your father, but I knew she didn't want to bug him. But he got home at ten thirty at night with all his pain, the ass bullshit he's got to eat from his boss and he lost the commission here and he's pissed off. Give me a scotch, what's what you make he don't want to hear. Let me tell you what ahh did

bead he Now I was his private joy. I enjoy And I definitely could have been a prick a lot of the time. But my mother and I always get along. But you still need that, you still need to be reprimanded. And in my house, if my father was at home, Jack could reprimand me, Frankie could. The next door neighbor could. If Uncle sal was over, he could say, don't talk to you mother that way. I mean, I got it from every every grown up. But anyhow, back to miss Hilton.

She told the committee, you know, these places promise healing, growth and support, but I wasn't allowed to speak, I wasn't allowed to move freely. I couldn't look out a window for two years. Wow. Well, i'll tell you there's something you need to know about this in a minute or two. But it's unbelievable what she went through. And I know she was a bit of a bad seed growing up in the spotlet of her family's famous name,

and her mother was nuts. But it just so happened that she and Kim Kardashian they came up at the same time, and I saw them out. I saw Paris out more than Kim, but I seen them together here and there. And I've told the story about how she and Kim were both at my book party back in two thousand and bel Air. I never met them per se, but my friend Christine Peters, the producer, invited and Rick Hilton because she was friends with them, and I guess

they had Paris and Kim come as well. Great party, you know, like if you think about that now, Paris and came and my book buddy didn't even know my name. I think somebody asked, Joey asked, and what's this party for? And they said, I don't know, some book didn't know me at all, just wanted to be seen, wanted to go out. But you know, I had Rackel Welsh there, had Joan Jet came with her girlfriend, had Jeff Goldblum, John Corbett came in with his ex girlfriend, that blonde chick,

Brittney Something. She was a doll, Victoria Gotti. But that night, you know, Parison came stumbled upon my nephew, Joe. Joe was younger about two thousands, so twenty five years ago. He was probably twenty nineteen, right around their age. A little younger, and they started talking to him and they asked him, where are you going after this party? Like what were you doing next? He didn't know what to say because I asked my uncle, you know, he comes up to me, Brown, look at these two chicks. They

asked me where we're going after the party? Now I came to the party. I took Kathy Saint George, the old playboy playmate that I've mentioned in the past, with me, because she was one of those chicks that could talk to anybody. I could walk away from her and tend to my party. I could sit down with a woman or a few people, and Kathy would wander off and find someone else to talk to. It was very easy. There was no jealousy. Weren't together together, so there was

no jealousy. So it's an easy thing to do. Then bring a girlfriend and have to deal with why you're talking to her so long? Who's she? I don't want to hear that shit from my book party. So I took Kathy, and so I said to Joey, I said, well, look, I'm with Kathy. I'm gonna leave with Kathy, but you don't want to be with the joe did this Paris is a party girl, and I think the other one, Kim, is a resistant of some shit. Cleans out her closets done, he goes, look at them, bro, I said, I know,

but listen, welcome to Los Angeles. They're gonna be more in every corner. Just don't worry about it. You're never gonna get bored or run on the girls to look at here. Anyhow, She's still bothered. Even my cousin Barrio bothers me because the same thing happened with him and I and he saw them, and they saw him and they liked his Brooklyn accent and they never met a guy like that back then. And I'm like, now, we're not going to go with them. How stupid I could

have got in there f O my god. Maybe I'm just saying, but Paris has to fight a lot. And she appeared on some news shows to talk about how horrible a time she had. But there is cause to doubt her story. It's a lot of confusion having to do with the years that she was sent away ninety seven through ninety nine, and which school she attended or schools plural. The word is that Paris first was sent to Canterbury school in Connecticut from the fall of ninety

eight to the winter of ninety nine. She was a junior. She was even a member of the ice hockey team. Could you imagine Paris Hill not ice skates, playing hockey. I've seen the photo. And then the feb of ninety nine she got expelled from Canterbury for violating school rules. But she said in the past that she was at the Provocalion School for eleven months from ninety eight to ninety nine. So how did she play on the hockey team in Connecticut and attend the other school of Utah.

They're not close together, you know. I mean, she's saying that she wasn't allowed sunlight, was force fed drugs, she was in solitary, but she was playing hockey on the other side of the country. She also said, well, it's also been stated that if you look up research on that Paris Hilton state at Provo Canyon School until she turned eighteen. But she wrote that those closest to her, including her own sibling warren't told the truth about where

she'd been from ninety seven to ninety nine. They didn't tell the other kids where she was. And by the way, she walked in fashion shows in nineteen ninety seven. There's proof of her walking in the Girl's Rural Fashion Show October first of ninety seven in New York City. So, what the hell's going on? I remember hearing a story

a while back. The one day she and a friend went to get their care packages that are sent by families, you know, and the family was there and Paris introduced his friend to her sister, Nikki and her mother, Kathy, And on that particular occasion, Kathy Hilton, her mom, begins to cry hysterically because she felt that Paris gained a little weight since she first went to the school, and her mother was really concerned about Paris not being able to model because she was fat. And at the time,

Paris weighed one hundred and six pounds. And you wonder why she's fucked up, because her mother's always been fucked up and her father's a soy boy baita male. But they had a rough time with this young girl man. Even when she was fifteen, she told her parents she wanted to go to this professional children's school with McCaulay Culkin and Christina Rie and she went to Sacred Heart and she's mom. She went she interviewed Sacre, Hadden said, I'm not going to then all girls' school. I need

boys around me. That's not what the mother wanted to hear. But you know at this school there were there were kids that were ballerinas. You know, they look when you deal with money like that, when you were people that have the kind of last day Mike the Hiltons, and you deal with these Manhattan private schools. You know, there's a school called Dwight, a private school called Dwight that she went to for a bit. And they say the acronym for Dwight is dumb white idiots getting high together.

A lot of times these schools, these schools for troubled teams, or boarding schools at private schools, et cetera. I mean, life goes fast for these kids when they're there. It may be like a status say well to say, oh my kid got at to Saint Andrew's where the royals went. Okay, great? Can you keep an eye on them all the way across the world. I would not be comfortable with that, man. I know it's prestigious, I get it, but what about is he going to bed highs? He waking up late?

Is he missing classes? He getting girls. What's going on? I don't like that, So you know, you get what you get. You send your little girl out there. It looks like a fucking Barbie doll. You think the boys aren't gonna go mananas bananas and the women there so many lesbians and schools like this. So many girls that go to these schools have this sexuality kind of you know,

they they really don't know what their sexuality is. And you're dealing with kids who have the last names of the major wealthy Ratswells, Steinberg's Tish, you got Saudi prince kids. You know, it's ridiculous. So of course when you're with the children of these very, very uber wealthy families, they're going to do bad things. And that's what Paris did. Although my mother said she kept the three point nine GPA.

I don't believe that one bit. But look, she they had to move around because they said she was being stalked by boys. And Kathy Hilton I've heard back in the day, was very concerned about Leonardo DiCaprio, who would not leave Paris alone, always turned up where she was. And like I said, I knew Leo back then, typical young guy horned dog, you know, wanted it, but he wanted it, wanted every girl he saw, still does just

nobody over twenty five. But yeah, Kathy Hilton said that a lot of the moving around was done because Leo was after. What would be so bad if she ended up with Leo? Better than this friggin Carter room she's with now. But there's a theory, if you think about it, that Paris Hilton came back for these schools and thought of giving off gay vibes. And a lot of people believe that something happened while she was away from home. You know, some experiment thing which happens in colleges. Why

would it happen when you're younger? Think about it? Ice hockey interesting choice of sports back when she played it in the nineties. You know, I don't know was she a tomboy or a lesbian? Well, I don't see her as a tomboy. There's even stories about her sleeping with Britney Spears and Lindsay lohand back in the day when they all hung out together. And of course we know the story that her husband is her beard and she is his beard at all kind of makes sense when

you fold it together. Speaking of Britney, Britney spears by the way, that incident the other night when she went to a restaurant called Red Oh One with a friend. She had flip flops and short shorts on. Looked like hell well, she looked like she looks like in an Instagram video. She just bedraggled, and at one point she picked up a glass. She had one wine. The guys gave her one wine. Otherwise she had bought her She

held up the wine and toasted the whole room. Nobody even cared, No one clapped, no one gave a shit that she was doing that. Took the tour of the restaurant, then was let outside, and then this video of her in her Mercedes driving erradically, going over the line in the center of the street, whipping a U turn out of nowhere, hanging on. Louis had a nowhere tires screeching. Then she stopped in front of her I don't know

if it's her house or whatever she was. She stopped and the person following her was videotaping, going, oh my god, Oh my god, what she doing. She's gonna herself killed now. Paris Hilton says that wasn't her, that was her look alike. There's a girl around her that drives a car just like hers and is a look alike. She wrote that on her Instagram. Meanwhile, the owner of the restaurant, her manager, says, Britney was great. She came in, she had a few drinks.

I gave her a wine. That's all she had. She wasn't rude, wasn't loud, she was really sweet and she left. So what you I said, Brittany? I think I said Paris earlier, Brittany? Which is it? Are you sane and were you nice at the restaurant like the guy says? Or are you still thinking there's a look alike driving your car? Just more fodder to show you how sick she is. She's nuts. The girl's nuts. And it's not gonna end well as we said, as I've said for years,

but it's getting real close. The wick is almost to the nub. Get ready, Oh one more thing. One of you guys asked me days ago, and they asked me anything page about. I think one of my favorite memories of Jack and Roe was something like that. Forget who asked? I apologize and I got to tell you my favorite episode. Oh, favorite moment. I don't know why I said episode favorite moment was When I was younger, Jack and Roe were always the first to get up and dance. And I'm

talking five, six, seven, eight years old. They'd be out by the pool, the radio beyond a good Swowman come on and they have to start dancing by the pool. As I got older, that dance became the hustle and that was more of what the Beg's played or Donna Summer played. It was just great to have music around the pool and watch them to dance. And then all the weddings we went to and so many parties. There was so much of that, all cousins getting married, just

costume parties, anaver street parties. It was endless. Everybody celebrated back then. Maybe they still do. My family's just old now. I don't know. But Jack and Rolle were the first

ones to get up. Always looked terrific dancing together, both of them, Jack so Hanso and Rosie so beautiful, spinning As soon as we got there, the first sound of the first song Let's go row dancing, and it reminded me of that because last weekend, Joey and Juliet Rosalie went to New Jersey for the wedding of our good friend Joe and Barbara Roblade's son had a nice, beautiful wedding in New Jersey. Though they don't spare any expense. Those two forget that. Oh my god, they're wonderful with

what they do for their family. But I saw Joey dance with Rope and it was like, oh my god. Jack didn't go. Obviously he's home in bed not well. But watching my nephew dance with her, watching her son dance like his dad used to, it really kind of not in my throat. Rosie's not quite moving as well as she used to. I said to her, there goes your knee, there goes you're back, and she said, you forgot my hip. I said, yeah, that too. So I'm giving her a few days to sit on a heating

pad before I call her and get the scoop. But the first moment had to be when I was young and there was a song. Well it's probably called ready or Not Here I Come, but I remember as the lyrics apple peaches, pumpkin, Pa, you were young and so ah, such a breaday on, here I Come, and that was the first song. I remember them dancing too, and that's

my finest memory of those two. Just beautiful, beautiful. And from that you go fast forward fifty years and they're at a wedding and the next song that became theirs was Kenny Rogers. Through the years, I'm sure many of you have parents who are older siblings who used that song as their either wedding song or anniversary song, what have you. But yeah, it happened in a snap man for you go from apple, peaches, pumpkin pie to through the years. It feels like it was just yesterday, But

I'm sure was it? Sure was it. That's it for today, Gang, I'm aj Benz and that was your daily Unfiltered podcast for October twenty ninth, twenty twenty five. T is tomorrow.