Tolerate Discomfort the Source of Serenity

We are continuing with the theme of being Sovel / Tolerating x. We quoted the Elder of Kelm who said that the trait of Sovel is the source of all good character traits (as we discussed in the past two lessons) and it's the source of menucha / serenity and peace . How so? A pasuk in Bereshit says, יִשָּׂשׂכָר חֲמֹר גָּרֶם רֹבֵץ בֵּין הַמִּשְׁפְּתָיִם: (טו) וַיַּרְא מְנֻחָה כִּי טוֹב וְאֶת הָאָרֶץ כִּי נָעֵמָה Yisachar is like a donkey with strong bones, he sees that serenity and tranquility is good. And what does he do? וַיֵּט שִׁכְמוֹ לִסְבֹּל : He tilts his shoulder to carry the load. This pasuk is the first time the word Sovel shows up in the Torah, and Rav Sadok HaKohen says that the first time something shows up is the source of the concept. Yasachar is the tribe who carries the load of Torah. Very nice. He carries the load. But what does that have to do with peace and tranquility? If someone wants peace and tranquility, they don't carry a load, They sit down and relax, seemingly . But Rav Yerucham Levovitz (a student of the Elder of Kelm) says in his Sefer Da’at Torah that people make a mistake- they don't understand how character traits work in the human psyche. They think that menucha , emotional tranquility comes from giving the body rest. But it says it's the exact opposite. If your tranquility comes from physical contentment and fulfillment and having everything that you need, that's the source of all confusion . It’s the source of the opposite of menucha . If you are only used to serenity under certain conditions, and you need to have all those conditions met to have serenity, then when you don't have those conditions, you're going to be totally out of whack. For example, if you only know how to fly business class, you're going be quite miserable when you fly coach. If want train yourself to be able to enjoy a flight, train yourself by sitting in baggage class. If nothing bothers you, then you have menucha . I remember an older man from Europe who lived in Brooklyn, named Mr. Lowy. It was a cold day, and he walked with a limp and I said, “ Mr. Lowy, Why don't you go to Florida? Why are you in this cold weather in Brooklyn? Take a vacation.” And he said, “ I went through Siberia during the war time, through Russian winters without a coat. I'm in America now. And I have a coat- that's a vacation!” And that's the point. If you went through Siberia, you don't need Florida. And if you need Florida, you're actually not having Menuchat HaNefesh. When you come back from Florida, you start being feeling even more miserable about the cold in Brooklyn. So feeding your wants, he says, is like trying to put a fire out with oil. Yes, for a moment, the fire will go down, but it comes back even more fiercely. It's like trying to quench your thirst with salt water. For a moment it works, but then you get even thirstier. So what do we do? He says, Look to the outside world- how do they train a soldier? They don't train a soldier by giving him air conditioned cockpits. The Navy Seals have to go through a very heavy training course with no pleasures or extras . And then they are able to have clear minds and fight in all situations. He says that's what it means that Yisachar saw menucha is good. He saw what menucha means. He said, If want to have menucha, I have to be Sovel. I have to be able to tolerate difficult situations . The Mishnah in Pirkei Avot says (chapter 6, mishna 4), What is the way of Torah? Eat bread with salt, have water in a measure, sleep on the ground and live a life of pain. And then you'll toil in Torah . And that's menucha , because you don't need anything else. You've trained yourself to survive on less. He says that today in the world, we are so fragile. He says, a chatan that is missing his cuff links can't handle it. We can’t handle when every little thing doesn't go exactly the way we like it to. We think that we're making ourselves stronger and better by putting recessed heat in the bathroom, on the tile, so when we get out of the bathtub , our toes don't get cold… and everything that we have. We're constantly trying to avoid things, because we don't know how to tolerate them . We don't know how to tolerate. We're not talking just about tolerating insults- that was yesterday's class. We're talking about tolerating anything that doesn't go right. How do we tolerate pain? We take aspirin, or go running for a shot. But this inability to tolerate causes a lack of peace of mind, and not the peace of mind you would think. It's a heavy concept, to be continued...