¶ Inspiring Lives
Welcome to Aging with Purpose and Passion , the podcast designed to inspire your greatness and thrive through life . Get ready to conquer your fears . Here's your host psychotherapist , coach and empowerment expert , beverly Glaser therapist , coach and empowerment expert , beverly Glazer .
This episode will challenge your perceptions and inspire you to see possibilities when others will see obstacles in their path . Welcome to Aging with Purpose and Passion . I'm Beverly Glazer and I help women navigate the stress of business , family and relationships , and sometimes even addictions , and you can find me on reinventimpossiblecom .
So in this episode , we're going to dive right into the incredible , the Incredible Journey of Dr Lynette Louise , also known as the Brain Brought . Louise shares her story of resilience , love and the pursuit of healing , from adopting children with special needs , pioneering work in neurofeedback and writing and speaking to help others .
Neurofeedback and writing and speaking to help others . You are going to find that one person can really make an impact on countless lives . So welcome Lynette . It's really great .
Thank you so much . Thank you for having me here , and also thank you to everyone who's listening .
Terrific . I want to ask you , tell me , tell me about you , you , you know you just did , and you did such a good job .
Sorry , I won't talk on your words again no problem .
But what about you ? How did you grow up as a child ? Because you've done some awesome things in your life . So what went on in your life growing up ?
You know that's such an interesting question for you to start with , because I recently I used to speak a lot on growing up with childhood abuse and the different things that happen when you have a lot of anger in your parents and and you know , sexual inappropriateness and things like that , and I stopped because sometimes and this is actually going to be such an
important thing to think about Sometimes , if you keep telling your story in order to help others , you keep yourself in your story . So generally , I don't go all the way anymore . Back to my childhood , so I'm just going to gloss it over and say you know , it was a bit rough .
There was a lot of challenges , my mom had a lot of rage and it created motivators in me to change the world and protect children . And here I am to save the day right . So I responded to that with a big desire to make a difference and we'll leave my childhood there . But that's how I grew up .
Oh , the childhood right there , because you've helped so many other children and you know how did your parenting shape you Like , how come you parented the way you did and you were so not brought up like that .
Well , I have to say , there was always in the early years not always in the early years the rage that my mother had was on the side . For me , it was something that and depression were here .
You know , I could feel them calling to me or being there and easy to access , or if I didn't keep my guard up , it would access me and it was a process , like all things . I think it's what you want to make happen . That's what happens . You know , it's funny . My firstborn , she , used to dream of being a mom in the country with 30 kids who were free .
And guess what ? She became A mom in the country with 30 kids who were free . I really think we decide very , very young who we're going to be , and there may be , you know , some kind of catalyst that makes a full 180 on you and you and you change , but generally we decide am I going to be what I see , or am I going to break the chain ?
Am I going to be a mirror or am I going to reinvent ? And I chose when I was very young . I remember sitting in the bathroom while my mom's trying to break down the door and and thinking remember how this feels , remember how this feels . Remember how this feels . You're going to do it different . How many kids are you going to get ?
You're going to get two ? No , you're going to get four . No , you're going to get six . No you're going to get eight . No , you're going to get 12 . And really trying to figure out , how can I make sure that that's not what happens ? So I did walk into parenting with absolute adoration for my children and patients , but with patience .
This echo or this magnetized gravity pull that that I had to slowly teach myself , not to have give myself better ideas . I think that's the answer . You have to have a better idea and in fact that is the answer . Too often we just do what we saw and those are our ideas , and so when you get better ideas , then you can access a better response .
But you chose not only to adopt children and have your own , but adopt children with special needs . And what possessed you to do that ? What motivated you ?
You know , I would love to pretend I was so wonderful , but the truth is I wasn't trying to adopt children with special needs . I was trying to adopt and I had two girls . I wanted two boys , bookends , you know , two boys , two girls , and I didn't want to have more of my own . I wanted to adopt . My father was adopted , my brother was adopted .
Adoption was a normal choice in our family . But when you look into the process and you see , oh , there's all these children that nobody wants and so , as I educated because that's part of adopting is they have you take foster classes , then you have your take adoption classes . So by the time you're cleared for adoption this was in Canada .
By the time I was cleared for adoption , I was very aware that I would be able to get children more easily if they were special needs , if they'd had a very challenging life , so it'd be quicker and maybe they would never find a home , and that , you know , pulled my heartstrings big time .
So there we were , adopting special needs children , and once , once the government knows you'll do it and that you're good at it and you're committed to it , they'll give you lots .
I'll bet and you did have lots , but you have now become a single mom and there are plenty of challenges now raising eight children and four who are on the spectrum .
Well , you know what Actually my children are raised . I'm old , I'm retired . Oh , I say I'm retired . I seem to still be working and writing books and stuff , but I only do what I want . It was really a lot of work . Um , it was really a lot of work . I wouldn't say it was more challenging than raising my neurotypical kids .
I would say it was just more work and there were less . In some ways it was easier because I had we're back to the template the blueprint of your childhood .
Well , I didn't have a blueprint for how you treat people with multiple handicaps or being on the spectrum or all these different things that they had , tourette's and just the different issues that came up for them . I had to figure it out myself . Well , that was a clean slate .
So I could get this clean slate and go well , that doesn't make sense , let's not hit them Right , that doesn't make sense . I don't think we should scream at them , I don't think we should make them sit in that chair . For you know like I could think about it .
And then that bled over to my children and , in fact , as I started doing it with children , teaching parents of children all over the world , and became the brain broad and learned how to do neurofeedback and all that . One of the things that always happened was when I taught , I learned .
So I see myself as you know , if I were to give you an I am statement , I am someone who enriches people's lives and in the process I get to enrich my own , and it's true , you know know .
You always learn what you teach . Absolutely tell everybody about neurofeedback . I know I've worked with that as well . Um , what was that like ? When did you discover neurofeedback ? And you also use neurofeedback on your children , so explain that to everyone who would not even know what that is . Okay .
So and of course it's another big thing we're going to have to simplify in a big way but essentially it's biofeedback for the brain . And what is biofeedback ? Biofeedback is getting information about your biology in real time , right ? So your heart is beating like this , your temperature is this , you weigh this much .
That's a form of feedback , but it's not necessarily feedback . You're learning to change until you kind of hook yourself up to various sensors and get that information fed to you and get told you can make a difference here . You need all that . So for simplicity's sake because the brain's very complex let's talk about your heartbeat .
If I hook you up and you're looking at your heartbeat and I say slow your heartbeat , guess what ? You don't even have to know how you did it . Now you may know that if you breathe deep and slow because you've probably heard that it might slow my heart you may know and have a sense calm , I need to calm myself that'll slow my heart .
But even if you didn't know any of that me just saying slow your heartbeat while you're looking at the information of how your heart is beating , your body and your brain will take that feedback and it will adjust and it will slow your heartbeat .
Now multiply that by a gazillion , because you've got so many neurons and brainwaves and things firing in your brain that by a gazillion , because you got so many neurons and brainwaves and things firing in your brain . It's more complex to explain , but it's the same process .
I put sensors on the head , I show you how your brainwaves are functioning , tell you which part you should make less of , which part you should make more of , and you need all your brainwaves .
You just , in some locations you want more of the lower frequencies , in some locations you want more of the higher frequencies , depending on what you're doing Are you sleeping , are you studying , et cetera and when we tell you and you look at that feedback and that direct information , your brain goes oh well , why didn't you say so ?
I've been trying to figure this out myself , right , and so now it shifts and it's miraculous , it's amazing . And that's what neurofeedback is and , yes , I used it on .
¶ Empowering Parents Through Learning
I was motivated by my children for everything I ever learned . Everything I ever did was always well , if I go study ABA oh no , I don't want to do that . Well , if I go study play therapy okay , I like this one . Oh . If I go study massage , if I go like I just was .
In fact I ended up learning simply because I was trying to help my children and then in the process I ended up helping other people's children , so of course I used it on them and on me and on anyone that would let me when I was learning , and then everyone wanted it . So it kind of evolved itself .
And what I thought was absolutely wonderful . I mean , I told you I knew about neurofeedback , I worked with it in an office , but you brought the machine to other people's homes .
Yes , Tell us about that story . You know that was really new . Now it's done right . I fought for that and everybody said you shouldn't be doing that . You shouldn't be doing that Right , I fought for that and everybody said you shouldn't be doing that .
You shouldn't be doing that because not only did I bring it to their homes , but I got units and taught the parents how to use it for the children . Why ? Why ?
Because when I was trying to help my children , the one thing I knew is waiting for a week to go to the doctor when they're having the meltdown now isn't going to serve me well , and you telling me to just over-medicate them until that week appointment comes up isn't going to fix whatever's causing it .
And all I wanted was to put in the hands of families whether and it isn't just children I worked with , I work with adults , I work with , you know , the neighbor , sometimes the pupils .
I've outfitted all kinds of people and but to put it in the hands of those people when the problem is happening , the change is so quick and it's so immediate to the issue and it made so much sense to me because of my life .
So that's what I was doing with it and I was getting amazing change and my children all ended up , you know , off the spectrum , working doing well , independent . It was great . Well , except for one . He's got a bigger story .
But I just wanted to do that for other families everywhere and so I fought for it and I got permission and I got different doctors because you know your license only covers certain places so you need to partner with doctors everywhere and it was difficult .
But I combined that with play therapy and I would teach parents how to respond differently so they didn't recontaminate the emotions and the environment for the person and hang out , be friendly therapy if they're adults . And it just evolved and people found me after word of mouth . Yeah .
And how does play and joy and humor and all that come into your professional as well as your personal life ? Because you did acting as well .
Acting stand-up comedy . I was a clown . No Well , first of all . First of all , I got married . A lot looking for a hero Discovered . That doesn't work . You have to be your own hero and I've got all these kids . What am I going to do with that ? And I have to make a living , and I have , and I don't know any other way .
So I start doing comedy on stage because it's at night . I'm singing in bars because it's at night and I can , you know , be there for the kids in the day and work at night . It was exhausting , but I just did whatever came up , whatever was possible .
There was a chance for me to be a clown , but I had to take care of my kids because it was during the day at a festival . So I dressed them all up like little clowns and made them part of the act in an improv thing , and they were hilarious . I never got called back , but I made the grocery money .
So a lot of this is the mother of necessity , right . I just had to do these things . Therapy taught me even more was that learning in a free and happy environment solidifies and changes a person quicker , improves the person quicker , and they take ownership of the lesson quicker and you have more energy and you have more fun .
So you are willing to keep doing it as a parent . If you aren't willing to keep going , that's when you end up like my mom . So it just sort of was a natural thing . What was different in how I did it is I did play . Once I learned neurofeedback , which came after play therapy in my learning curve . I did play therapy like neurofeedback .
So if the child went up I went oh , you're trying to say up . And it was immediate , it was quick feedback and then I would respond and pick them up . So I did it in the same speed and way as what was happening for their brain and it was amazing .
Fantastic . What advice would you give to other parents who are facing all kinds of challenges , not only with you know , child on the spectrum , but so many other challenges with their children where behavior is concerned ? What would you advise ?
them Always reach for a better idea . I mean , I started there , right ? You know , we all grow up . You don't have to grow up in that kind of difficulty that I grew up in . We all grew up in challenges and a different era , right . So you grow up with a different world , especially with technology going the way it is .
So as a parent , you're a little out of step with your child at all times , and trying to repeat the life that you had doesn't make sense . You have to embrace the life that they have . So give them a voice , Make sure that they are allowed to say their mind and then that you actually entertain a way of working in their wishes .
So you don't just say , okay , what do you think ? Okay , now I'm ignoring you and doing it my way . But more importantly , just a simple way of thinking is I need a new idea , I need more ideas . I need to read a lot , watch a lot , listen to a lot and keep the judgments at bay .
You know , at the end of the day , my first born and my second born were complete opposite . Moms raised their children completely the opposite , and I stepped back and went . I can't tell what's better , you know . So let the judgments . Go and do what feels right , but keep learning keep learning . Where can people find you , Lynette ?
Lynette louisecom is one of my websites , brainbodynet . By the way , we didn't mention it , but I wrote a new book that I think your readers or your watchers will love , because it teaches a lot about memory and a lot of us have real challenges with memory as we get older and they may not fully understand what that's about .
It's a good story to it , so it's about a woman who had multiple personalities and , like you'll have fun with it , had multiple personalities and like you'll have fun with it , but you'll learn . So , LynetteLouisecom , brainbodynet , I'm on YouTube . I have a YouTube channel . You can just do Lynette Louise and look for me . I'm on X . I'm on Facebook .
I wanted to thank you so much , Lynette . Dr Lynette Louise the Brain Broad is an international brain expert .
She is an award-winning speaker author and she's also a teacher and a humanitarian , and all her links are going to be in my show notes as well , and on reinventimpossiblecom Get my weekly self-coaching tips , and that link will also be in the show notes as well .
You can connect with me , Beverly Glazer , on all social media platforms and in my positive group of women on Facebook , Women Over 50 Rock , and you can also schedule a quick Zoom to talk to me personally . Thank you for listening . Have you enjoyed this conversation ?
Please join me next week , subscribe and get all these episodes in your inbox and send it to a friend . And remember you only have one life to live , so live it with purpose and with passion . With passion . Thank you for joining us .
You can connect with Bev on her website , reinventimpossiblecom and , while you're there , join our newsletter subscribe so you don't miss an episode . Until next time , keep aging with purpose and passion and celebrate life .