Hey, this is Mark Butler and you are listening to a podcast for coaches. A few months back. I released an episode talking about my significant concerns with the launch based business model. And. My friend and client, Kristen boss happened to listen to that episode and she told me. That she was on a walk while she was listening to the episode and she was agreeing with me so enthusiastically that she was pumping her fists. And kind of shouting.
Into the neighborhood, which I thought was very funny. And she said, when we were talking about this. You know, you really are sharing some important truths with people and I'd be happy to come on your podcast and share my personal experience with the things you were teaching. Which is very generous of her. She's had some very high highs in that model. She's had some very low lows. And she's been in the trenches. I've been an observer of the launch based business model. She's been.
On the front lines for almost five years. It's paid off in some big ways for her. And it's also cost her a great deal. So I'm really grateful that Kristen would come on the show and be so open and so vulnerable with her experience. And I'm very happy to share with you. So. Without further ado, let's get into a conversation between me and my friend, Kristen boss.
Okay. So, what was causing you to pump your fist?
Okay, I think it was a couple things. It was it was when you talked about when we develop an unrealistic reality based on one big successful launch and like forgetting that what you've actually done is emptied the auditorium. And realize like you've capitalized on the auditorium that you've been filling for however long by giving value, adding to people. And so when you make an offer that the auditorium empties but you know and I think this is so important.
You talked about like the insane flooding of dopamine that happens in your brain. When that happens and you and I, you have actually seen me come off of a massive dopamine high where it's it's almost like an adrenaline crash. Like it's so bad.
And so talking about the idea of We develop these unrealistic expectations, but then especially when you talked about you start, you talk to a market and then the, you get used to talking to that market and then you expand into the cold market and you're still talking to that cold market as if you're in the warm market. And they don't resonate with you. And that person's well, why? Why do people hate me? What's going on?
Well, it's because you don't realize you're talking to a completely different market of people that they could care less about you. In fact, they're probably hostile towards you. And so just the idea of like realistic expectations on filling your auditoriums or creating demand for your offer. How often is a sustainable to put, you know, to make an ask of your audience.
And protecting your mindset in between and developing, you know realistic expectations and all the things with like our dopamine and adrenaline and cortisol. And I think I said this to you once that my therapist said to me, she's adrenaline or what you call it. She's adrenaline is for novices in business. Learning to work without adrenaline is when you become pro.
Your therapist said that? Yeah! You might have told me that. Yeah. Does she work with a lot of business owners? No. I mean, it's pretty. She just
worked with me
long enough. It's pretty spot on. Yeah. And the launch model is so adrenaline fueled.
Oh.
Yeah. She's pretty spot on. Maybe we can give some color to this. So you started your business in 2019?
Yeah, at the end of 2019.
Did you start with a one to many offer? Did you start with one on one?
I started with one on one. You weren't there for
long though.
Nope. Well, when I offered paid, I was coaching people for free to get proof of concept for a year leading up to that.
A whole year? A
whole year.
How much coaching were you doing for free in that season?
Not many, I think three to six people that I was just working with closely to, I was testing concepts and I'll never forget. It was one girl I saw trying to launch a course on Instagram and her marketing was just terrible. And it was like a, Course for postpartum moms. And she was crying in her stories. And I was like, I feel really bad for this girl. And I reached out, I was like, can I help you? Can I help you sell her course? And she's I don't have any money.
I'm like, I don't want your money. Can I just help you? And we're going to help each other. I'm going to help you make money and I'm going to learn from you as I coach you. So I had a few of those people. It's so fun. She's making six figures now, but
How did you know, how were you confident, you're a confident person. That doesn't surprise me. But how were you confident to reach out to her to talk to her about online marketing? Had you done?
Yeah. I mean, I had done, well, because I had experienced network marketing. So I understood this is how you talk to an audience, but also I'm the weirdo that was reading marketing books for fun. Okay. Yeah. So for me, I was like, but also because I was a hairstylist for 15 years, you understand human psychology. Like when you hear people verbally processing how they think, how they feel, how they make decisions.
I'm a very I read people very well, so I could see how her messaging wasn't relating on a human psychological level. And I'm like, listen. I'm bored reading your stuff. This is why it's not resonating. Let me help you. So yeah,
that's, I did not know that you'd been, I knew you'd been a hairstylist, a hair person for a long time. I didn't know that you had an interest in marketing that predated your launch into your business.
Yes. And I think that is what was a helping hand. Why it grew so fast. Part of it. There's a few, there's a few factors there.
Yeah. A few factors. So you work with these people for free for a while. You're developing your concept. Are you starting to publish content in this season?
Oh yeah. I'm already, I'm just sharing content. There was a season where I was getting really good at creating content just because I enjoyed social media. I was figuring it out. I was following some people. And so when I was in network marketing, it was like, tired mom, brand and like people could scroll back on my Instagram and watch the evolution. And yeah, I was just and then I remember I made the pivot being like, I want to talk about mindset and I want to talk about marketing.
So I just started sharing content Hey, here's why people aren't paying attention to you. Hey, here's what you could do differently. And people started to resonate. But no one was really, I would get a lot of you're so inspiring, but no one I want to work with you. It took a like four to six months for people to be like, Hey, can you help me, can you help me look at this? So I was like helping people for, for free. And then I think I started like low cost, a hundred dollar.
as you want sessions, like 90 minute sessions where I would give you some strategy. So I did that for a while. And then when I built the confidence where I'm like, I have the proof of concept, I know it works. That was when I put together my first six month, 5, 000 weekly coaching with me for six months. And that was my first paid coaching.
Was all your content on Instagram or were you actually started
on Facebook? I started on Facebook and I grew a Facebook group that was a niched group for online business. And I just talked about it in there. So I did a monthly workshop in there and was like Hey, apply to work with me. If you like this, work with me. So that was my funnel. That was how I made my first like 300 K I think. What?
I don't know. I don't know any of this. Okay. So You were posting on Facebook and then from your post on Facebook people are landing in a Facebook group?
I would just I would talk about a problem and be like, hey this resonates with You should be over in my Facebook group where I talk more about this. So it's kind of using my personal feed That's like a funnel being like, Hey, hang over in this group. And anytime I was going to do a workshop, I'd be like, Hey, I'm doing this workshop. I'm going to serve you in this way. If you want to be a part of the workshop, it's over in this group.
So I was trickling people over and I was networking in groups and Networking in groups, other
groups.
Yep. And other Facebook groups, but just being a person of value, like just answering questions, not pitching myself, just being like, Hey, have you tried this? Hey, have you tried this? It's amazing what happens when you decide to just be a person of value. Go figure.
How much were you, if you remember, how often were you posting on Facebook? Were you
I think every day. Every day. Five days a week.
Was it video? Was it just
It was a lot of still images. And I would say this is before, I'm going to call it, and maybe it's not a fair thing to say, but I feel like this is before we had an oversaturation of coaches. On the Facebook space, applying the same principles where I was, I had this is where's my book. I read Ray Edwards, copywriting, pro book in 2019. And I did something radical. He did the copywriting for email marketing and for paid ads. But I took the principles of copywriting.
I was like, well, if I could just apply the same principles to organic marketing. Just how I post on my socials, this'll work. But that was before other people were doing that and teaching that. So I was getting great traction. Yeah.
Okay. Super interesting. So you're posting daily. You're applying marketing principles in the content that you're producing. You're networking groups. You're being a person of value. Define, define a person of value by its opposite. What's the opposite of a person of value in that context?
Person of need. Somebody that's coming with need, Gary Vanderchuk has this thing where he calls it like, the jab hook, it's like the give ask. The opposite of that's a person of value. The opposite, a person of need, is ask, give. Ask, give. And so it's like you're constantly pitching, selling. For me, it was just like a person that's not a value is it's very, actually, it's very transactional minded. They're very much thinking, I make a post. What do I get out of this post?
They struggle to zoom out and see the holistic picture of relational marketing. And it's very much if I do 10 posts,, eight out of the 10 should look like this and this post should yield this. It's like they're more formulaic and less holistic and relational.
You wouldn't consider your approach formulaic back then or ever.
I still don't, I still don't. Yeah.
Fascinating. So you experienced growth on Facebook primarily. And then after a season of growing that audience, you said how long passed before you made a multi thousand dollar group offering.
Okay. So when I made that, I'll never forget this. So I was like helping people for cheap or free. And then in August of 2019 is when I launched, I'll never forget it. I think it was called like, gosh, what was it called? It was either burnout to boss babe. No. It was called reset and reclaim speaking to people who were feeling burnt out in their business and how to reclaim. It was like, so cliche jargon. I look back and I still laugh and
burnout to boss babe is that's all time. Oh, that was my
first one. It was my burnout to boss babe Academy for eight.
It's so good. Oh, I love the boss. Babe is anyway, that's amazing.
So it was like the reset and reclaim. I might still have the printout somewhere. And this was when I was still doing hair. And the only time I could go live was I think it was like 6 AM. So I went live at 6 AM in this Facebook group. I'll never forget. I think I'm still wearing, I think I wore my PJs and I was like, come on, I'm going to do it. Yeah. And I made like a five, I made a really robust work workbook. And I was like, I'm gonna do an hour training each day. And here's the workbook.
And I think I got 250 people to that group just from promoting organically on my socials and actually, Oh no, I know how I did this. I did a call on my Facebook. I said, are you burnt out, tired, exhausted, and whatever? So put out like a pain call to be like, who's in pain? And I said, I'm doing this special project. I don't know if it could work still today because people have done it a lot now. If that's you know, message me. And I actually got on a call with, I got on a phone with 30 people.
And I interviewed them through a questionnaire and I asked them, what have you tried? What's frustrating? What do you need? And so after interviewing 30 people, I put together okay, I now have a concept of what I'm gonna do for this workshop, 250 people. And I'll have a picture of me. Posted in front of my mirror saying, and this is it, this is my actually first one to many offered. Now I totally forgot about this. It was like eight weeks, six weeks for 4. 99. So six weeks for, it wasn't 4. 99.
It was 2. 99. And I have this little note on my mirror and a dry erase marker. Congrats on your first 20, 000 launch. And so how many spots is that me thinking I was going to sell? Like 299 wait, 20, 000 divided by 299. Okay. I thought it was going to sell 65 spots out of the 250 people. Mind you, never done a webinar, never pitched to a group before, but Hey, I'm believing I'm going to manifest 20, 000. I was really into the manifesting language at the time. That's a whole nother conversation.
So then I was like, I have this little picture of me and I had, so I did this thing, got up at 6am every day. Five big old robust workbook made a call and be like, let's do this. I'm like 20 K and this is it's coming. And five people bought two of them were my close friends. One was my sister, but here's what I did. And I maybe six people bought and then three were close friends or something like that. And I was like, and my ego took a real hit.
It was like, well, I made 1, 600, not quite 20, 000, but I decided I'm going to see this through. I'm going to coach these people. I could have chosen to refund and be like, let's try that again. I was like, no, I'm going to see him through. I did it. And then that was when, so that group that I launched that five day in is when I created content for that group consistently starting in August. So August, September, October, I'm still doing training. I'm dropping value in there.
December is when I decide to offer. I do a, I did a holiday hot leads workshop and I'm like, I'm going to show you how to get your next 100 leads over the holidays and whatever else. And Did that and then I made my first offer like to work with me 5k for six months.
I think I got 40 discovery calls and That meant and my goal was 20k and I was like I just need four people to say yes to me out of 40 and I got five people to say yes And it blew my mind and we went and bought a TV at Costco the next day I was like, so yeah, and then I kept in that Facebook group and then I kept doing that like the rinse and repeat month workshop once a month, getting people to the group, incentivizing people to come to the group selling one on one.
And then I think I closed the group when I launched the social selling Academy later that August. But but yeah, that I just kind of kept that. And I would say I made my first, yeah, like 300, 400 K from that Facebook group.
And it had, when you made that first 5, 000 offer, there were a few hundred people in the Facebook group?
Like 400, 400 people, I think.
But I missed, where did you offer the 2. 99 thing? Was that just like on a Facebook live?
That was in the reset and reclaim five day workshop in the Facebook group. That was what I offered on the back end of that.
How much time passed between the 299 offer and the 5, 000 offer? You might have said.
About 90 days. About 90 days.
Fascinating. Okay. And then from there we know there's, kind of a meteoric rise. Now we're into 2020, which was as crazy in the network marketing world as it was.
In the coaching world. In the
coaching world. I wonder if people know, I think people know, but I wonder if people know what a boon COVID was. to online business.
If they didn't know, they know now.
Yeah.
They know now because we're dealing with a market correction now.
Yeah.
I think I, I've likened it to the when the housing bubble burst. I feel like we're having the online we're having a little bit of that. It's happening in the network marketing industry. There's a massive market correction happening. There's a market correction happening with the demand for coaching. I think there still is a demand for coaching. I think the demand for good coaches is higher than ever.
I think we're just weeding out the money grabbers from like the people that truly want to serve and have talent. Another conversation for another time, but
yeah. Yeah.
Or we can have that conversation.
As you know, I do accounting for a bunch of coaches, the place where I've seen demand shrink not to zero, but not far from zero is the demand for multi thousand dollar group experiences. In other words, the thing that you sold that we're just talking about.
Oh yeah.
I don't see those being purchased these days.
No, I think it's because people I think people want more for their money. I think the one on one That's doing great. I think there's still like value there. It's still the high attention, the high touch, but the group factor. It's either super scaled in a program level where there's, or high touch one on one is my thought. It's almost like the middle class offer. It's gone.
Yeah. There's
just there's like offer disparity happening now, even stronger offer disparity.
Oh, that's pretty insightful, actually. That's super interesting. So I want to, where I think you have amazing insight. You have a lot of insight to offer in a lot of areas, but I want to talk about this adrenaline fueled launching and you're to whatever degree you're comfortable sharing.
Oh, I'm
pretty vulnerable. I can share it, man. We started working together. I don't even remember exactly when, but. It was in the season in which you, we can cut this out if you, cause I don't know what you want to do with numbers, but it wasn't the season in which you were probably having your first like seven figure launches.
It was, I was going to say I had my first, I'll never forget, I had my first seven figure launch. And that was when I was like, I talked to Mark, but that was when I brought you on for numbers. But really you just served on a much better level than just numbers.
Talk about your psychology, your mindset leading up to And then going through and then after generating a million dollars in sales in a very tight time window.
You know, it's interesting. the coach that I was working with at the time wouldn't let me have this thought or experience, but it was my experience of what was happening. It was like, it felt like it was happening to me. Because I didn't set out to have a million dollar launch. Like my brain didn't even know that was possible. It's just.
Was it did like I had so so it was just kind of like it blew my mind It was like it was a surprise and maybe that's unfair to say but that was my experience of It was just like alright, I'm gonna do this again. I'll never forget my first multi six figure launch and my nervous system actually collapsed That was my first ever panic attack and it was I did a three day training at the end of the year I'm like, well, I've already hit my income goal for the year.
But you know, it'd be really fun to do a year end goal and I'll just sell the Academy and we'll see what happens. And I'll never forget my COO was like, Hey, how many workbooks should we order? I was like, I don't know. 30 seems like a lot. Let's do 30. And at the end of that, we had 250 people join. It was a 250, 000 lunch because it was a 1, 000 offer. And I couldn't breathe when I was in bed that night.
Like it felt like an elephant had sat down on my chest and really it was because I went from having, I think 60 people in a program, in the program to now 315 or however many. And what happened was my perception of control.
Was ripped out from me overnight being like there because I think with 70 people I had the at least psychological Delusion I'm thinking there was enough of me to still go around still touch enough people to ensure they had results Baby, then make sure they're okay, but then suddenly having 250 people on board overnight. It was like my nervous system was like, Oh my gosh, what if they all ask for a refund? What if I can't help them all? Does this actually work in volume?
Does this actually work if I can't give them all high touch? So it was very scary. And then we started seeing a lot of people with results. I'm like, okay, great. So in may we did this other event, another three day event. It was a thousand dollars. And I knew the program was worth 2000. I was like, well, we're going to increase in June. So I just announced it. I was like, Hey, come to this. I'm going to do this. I think we had 5, 000 people come to the live training.
And I think I thought, man, it'd be really cool to do 250 again, but I don't know. Well, I think it was 893 people. joint. And then the next month we were like, all right, the social line Academy is going to go up to 2, 000 by the end of this month, jump in while you can and another 400 people joined. So in a four week period, I made 1. 2 mil or 1. 3 mil. I just remember it being like, holy crap, this is wow. It felt like winning the lottery.
It didn't feel like you know, it wasn't like, The goal is 800. It was just like, let's see what happens. Then the psychological game really happens. So there's adrenaline and, I'm not gonna even, is it adrenaline? It's excitement.
And then, I wanna say, I had a massive adrenaline hangover, and then there was the I remember I I, do you remember when I had drama buying a purse, buying my first designer purse after that 1. 3 million dollars and you're like, I mean, do you want me to coach you on this? But it was like, I had this like thought because it felt lucky. I felt like my luck would run out and I felt like I was on borrowed time. So I was like, I can't buy a designer purse because this could all go away. I don't know.
So, I really operated within this is one big giant fluke for a while. And then that Christmas, because I was, I did these launches six months apart, so I would have this massive surge of insane amount of dopamine and adrenaline and ride that for a while and then it starts to deplete and then your thoughts start going to What if it all runs out? That's it. I, and you talked about this in that podcast episode of the auditorium.
Like what if the auditorium is completely empty and I have no one to sell to, no one's going to buy. I kept waiting to hit the bottom of the well. I'm like, the well's going to run dry. So that thought it was like I was creating my own very scarce adrenaline. Strike while the iron's hot. Keep going while I can. And I have this deep fear of becoming irrelevant in the world. And so, you add that to the well is gonna run dry. And so, you just have me as like a launch junkie.
I'll never forget wh What I needed to work on is that December, it was now a 2, 000 offer. I'd never sold the 2000. I had evidence that it would sell 900 people at a thousand and we're coming up on this launch. And I remember my thoughts very clearly. It was like, I don't think at this point there was a pressure yet with the launches. I think I was still gamifying it in my mind and therefore it was still fun. So I was like,. It's double the price.
If I can get, not the people to enroll this time, 400 people, that'd be really cool. So I was kind of in like the, that'd be really cool mentality. At this point, my team is still fairly lean. There's not massive operational expenses at this point. So everything is just gravy. At least it feels that way. So then that was the year where I was like, I did so much mindset with myself with like, all right, I was selling 2, 000 just as good. And then we had, I think we had the same amount of people.
So this is I believe, right around the market correction turning point and right around when iOS 14 software started changing the game with ads. And so and we would put a lot of money into ads and it would be great. Blah, blah. I'd get I think we had 15, 000 people come to that live event. I've still never seen that many people since. And that event was a 1. 3 million dollar event. I think that is when I started feeling deeply unsafe. And launches felt like, again, it, I was, my goal was 400.
We did 800. So again, it's exceeded my expectations, flood of adrenaline, flood of this. And that is when I think my mental health really started to suffer. After that launch. And then it started to become, I can only feel safe and you would notice this as you were coaching me I would start to develop, I'd feel good for a while until about 90 days leading up to the launch. And then I'd start to feel very anxious, very scared. What if I can't do it the same? A lot of pressure.
And it was like I was holding my breath and I like, and no matter how, like you coached me well, but I had a nervous system that was conditioned to only believe it was okay after a successful launch.. You mentioned it like a junkie and I don't think you're wrong in it. I talked to my therapist about this, about there's a ritualization that happens with addiction and that was absolutely what was happening with my launches.
There would be this ritualization that I didn't even know it was happening until I've been forced to detox from this. But it's like the, my ritualization was playing with numbers and I think you called me on this once and you're like, remember, you're like, you just like to play with numbers. Sorry to laugh, but
I would, you know, when we'd, oh, it's weird to talk to a client about their sessions in a public forum. I'm feeling really like hesitant to do it, but I appreciate
you. I'm giving you permission because I'm how
open you're being. It was so hard. To watch and I it's funny because as you're talking now, I'm feeling don't worry I'm not gonna burst into tears or something But i'm feeling like i'm feeling emotional about the fact that it was really hard to watch and we would coach together and I would say Hey this thing where you loop on the spreadsheet the mental spreadsheet where I could watch you shifting numbers around a spreadsheet in your mind constantly in this Kind of frantic loop.
It was hard to watch and we would talk about it You were always a great client and you would get these moments of like I it's like I could watch Literally and metaphorically I could watch your shoulders relax. It seemed like it would last not long Hours? Days?
Maybe days. Maybe. And that was just how my nervous system, it was like what my brain was just seeking safety and we talked about this, like the only way I could seek safety was in numbers that I could predict in my mind or spreadsheets or, and I would strategize to feel better. I would just sit there and strategize and being like, okay, if I can get this and then the conversion rate of this, and then we do this.
And again it was It was a compulsion, but really it was just my nervous system trying to find a way to regulate and I had not yet taught my nervous system how to do so. And so then it would be like, I'm not safe. I'm not safe. I'm not safe. Spiral, spiral, spiral, ritualize launch performed. And only because the launch performed can I believe I'm safe in the world. And so then I'd relax and be like, it's okay. It's okay. It's okay. And the window of feeling okay started to shrink.
It used to last me like five months and then it was 90 days and it was 60 days and it was 48 hours the fix wasn't fixing anymore.
I don't remember exactly, but the episode you heard me talking about, my sort of anti launching episode, it wasn't just about you
because
I've had this experience with so many. clients, but it might've even been recorded on the heels of one of our coaching calls. I don't remember. I wouldn't be
surprised. I'm like, I think I was
mad. I think I was just like, this is, I wasn't mad at you. I was like, this is
intervention
is lie. This lie is killing people that I care about. And that's dramatic, but it felt kind of true. But one of the, one of the things that was hard to watch you go through was that. You just said, the launch would perform, but the feeling of safety wouldn't last very long after the performing launch. My memory of it is the launch would perform, but with after the launch at the first 2, 000 price point, even though launches after that still brought in.
A lot of new people and a lot of money from that point, they didn't, they started to not reach the numbers that you had expected or hoped for, or envisioned in your mind. And that's where I start started to see the toll, really the mental emotional cost really increased because it's this crazy phenomenon. These are made up numbers, but if you watch somebody bring in 500, 000 in 48 hours, but they thought they were going to bring in 700, 000 in 48 hours, Suddenly 500, 000 feels dangerous.
It's this safety danger thing that you, I think, are articulating really beautifully. So to watch somebody bring in half a million dollars, but feel even less safe having done it.
Yes.
Brutally difficult to watch.
Well, and then, but what was also happening, what was creeping up at the same time was I was growing my team. I was Yes. So now I have operational expenses creeping up. And so now it's like a, it went from the launches being like, wouldn't it just be a delight for us to make this? Now it's we have to make at least this so I can pay for this company. And that is when I started deeply resenting this. Thing that I built because it just was like, it felt like it was just robbing me of so much.
Last year I still had another insane launch. I'm launching my new offer. Yeah,
such a good offer.
I'm still proud of that offer. And that was my biggest launch ever to date. That was my 2. 3 million launch.
Let's pause for one second there. I don't want you to lose that train of thought, but I want to tell people how I think that happened.
Oh, yeah. We can talk about that for sure.
Because I think what happened there was, it's the same principle of pent up demand.
It was. Stored up demand.
You had created this demand and then you'd launched and launched different offers very successfully. But the trust that you had in this large community was still as strong as ever. And as soon as there was a new compelling offer to make to the larger community where the trust was still present, maybe stronger than ever.
Yes.
That's the auditorium being not only full, but it's the, it's a bigger auditorium and completely full. And then you launch the new offer.
To my raving fans. Yeah. It wasn't to a cold market. It was to my existing students and it was an Ascension offer.
Yes. So in a sneaky way it's just the same thing happening again.
Yes. Yes.
But people in your position, very understandably, I think, sometimes don't view it as the same thing that happened the first time they launched successfully. They view it as, yep, this is just what we do. We're
going to do
it today, and then we're going to do it 90 days from now, and we're going to do it 90 days after that. But the auditorium did empty.
Yep. And I think I had awareness from that last summer. I feel like I was way less naive, like now it was an insane emotional high. Yep. And I was able to go off, go on to a sabbatical after that and I got some rest. But I knew, I had cashed in or monetized on stored up demand and the auditorium was likely empty. And the following launches have proven that it is not even close. And my good friend Pete Vargas was like, Oh, Kristen, this is the new offer phenomenon. You'll never see.
money like you do with a new offer to a diehard audience. you'll never repeat it. And I was like, all right, you know, thank you. But this is when maybe it was fall of last year when I was sensing, I was watching my industry. I was shifting. I was noticing things in the industry. I was noticing things on our ads. And that is when I, and I'll never forget this. It was summer of last year when I decided I have to get off this rollercoaster, this horribly toxic launch rollercoaster.
And I can't believe I'm going to say this, but the best thing that ever happened to me this year was a failed launch because I'm shocked to say this, but here's the thing. So long as the launches kept launching, so to speak, there was, I never felt the pressure to actually fix it and change my business model. Because the cash infusion would just put a band aid on the thing that was actually hemorrhaging.
Where it was just like, no, what the most, I would so much rather have monthly recurring revenue that's automated through how we serve and how we utilize our content. And this is the big shift we're making and the shift that I think the industry is about to do as well. So I was like, I have to get off this horrible rollercoaster, but it was always like, yeah, I should stop launching. That'd be nice.
But then I'd launch and then, you know, all the cash would come in and it wouldn't be an emergency anymore. I'm like, someday we'll stop launching. And it was this year, you know, spending an obscene amount of money at my live event and the launch not going in the way I thought. And there was a lot that went behind that, but that is what finally forced me to be like, All right, we have to change our business.
And I'm literally rebuilding my business from the ground up to get us out of a launch based business model. And it is the hardest thing I've ever done. And you and I have talked about this, where it's I am detoxing so hard from the adrenaline, dopamine, cortisol rollercoaster that I was on and It's amazing I'm not a fat alcoholic. Because you take a substance, and mine was launches, and you take it away from somebody that that is how they feel safe in the world.
We tend to run to other coping mechanisms. Right. And I've been on a health journey. And so I'm still, I'm walking, I'm counting my macros or whatever. And I've decided to not drink and I'm like, what a time to be sober. This is awful. All the feelings, like I'm not getting my fix from my launches anymore. If, you know, to be totally transparent because we're having to rebuild our business, we're having to lean out our machine.
And thankfully because We didn't increase our lifestyle to match what our top cash flow seasons were doing. My husband was very conservative and we put a lot of money away. And so, it's given our business a long enough on ramp. to sustain and survive while we are rebuilding the machine. And it is taking so much patience. There is no dopamine happening here.
There is I'm having to find dopamine everywhere else in my life, but my business, who'd have thought, but it's probably the best thing I could do. And I even told you that I think I shared this in one of our sessions when my therapist said only, Those of us that are lucky and fortunate enough to eventually have our systems fail us so that we do our real work in the world. And so my system failed me. This longed addiction that brought me high highs and the lowest lows. I'm glad I'm off it.
I think I'm still detoxing, but I'm having to like, I'll give you an example. We have a 1. 97 offer right now. And we've talked to you about this. I'm celebrating the hell out of 250 people joining. I'm like, this is amazing. 40 K. Yeah. You know, I'm celebrating when we're in the red by only 10 K instead of a hundred K instead of a hundred K launches. I'm like, but we're not a hundred K loss. Woo hoo. Look, we have eight months of runway to rebuild this instead of three months.
And so it's a season of, maybe business maturity. You know and learning that and I told you that one of my mentors, John, who works for me, said this was like, Kristen, I was like, Oh, my self concept is so shaken. I used to be so good at selling everything. Everything I touched turned to gold. And he's well, maybe you were just good at selling when everyone was buying. Maybe you're not, you're like, he said that to you. I'm like, yeah, it's so
good. Okay. That's
I have to surround my people, myself with people that are willing to tell me the truth. I don't want people blowing smoke up my butt and telling me what I want to hear. And do you remember when I, when we first started working, I told you, I wanted to have a board of character advisors, people that cared more about my character than about what was happening with my business. I got people saying hard things to me in my life.
Well, I wondered in the moment. And since then I've wondered when you had the launch that it's funny because by the way, folks, the launch that failed,
Yeah.
It didn't.
With a, with a 500, 000 live event, right? Yeah. And actually it didn't break even. We were so profitable.
Oh, so there's a little bit of profit but it's such an important story because the failure was, as is always the case, entirely perceived.
Correct.
It was just perceived, but I was so, we had coached on the way into that. you were giving me no signals whatsoever that it was going to go the way that you hoped. And so I was waiting for it to disappoint you. I don't think I told you this. And then when it did, I was so relieved.
I know.
And I remember that. Were you, because you reached out to me after that and we talked and I said, I'm so glad this happened.
I remember. I remember. I remember. Yes. I was. I'm mad. Yeah. No, not at all. Because I knew Mark. Cause I knew I had to face the thing I was most afraid of. And I was most afraid of a launch that had fallen so far beneath my expectations that I would perceive it as a failure. And I knew on our next call, I was like, Mark's going to be glad that the launch didn't rescue me. From. The work, the real work I had to do because that was the problem.
So long as the launch met my expectations, it kept me from having to do the work. So I'll never forget. It was the morning after my event and I man, I like chest heaving, sobs, just ugly cried. And I remember my husband being like, what do you need? I was like, What I need is to feel all of this because this feeling I'm feeling now is the thing I've been running from every single launch And I actually have to know that it's not killing me. It feels absolutely horrible It felt so bad.
And I just had to remind myself like, all right, we're experiencing really intense physical sensations. This is known as grief and disappointment and shock and anger and embarrassment and shame. Like I just had to process so many emotions that I had been running from every single launch where it was like, once the launch performed, it was like, whoo, I don't have to feel those things. And now it's okay.
But I. And I had that moment where I'm like, I sat with myself, I am facing the thing I was most afraid of. And I knew that was my work. So when you're like, I'm so relieved. I'm like, I knew you would be. I wasn't mad. I was like, of course you would be. That's why I hired you.
Well, there's I really am grateful that you would share that because Not a lot of people are going to experience the thing you experienced, the way you experienced it, because they're not going to have ever a 2. 3 million launch. I don't think I'll ever in my business life do that. But there's a universality to your experience because the pain of unmet expectations. And the shock to our psyche and to our identity.
I know you experienced with the people that you serve, but watching coaches or watching people even make little tiny offers or have little tiny successes and have it not go the way they hoped. And to see that just sort of break them
and
cause them to stop. It's the same thing. Your situation is in some ways. In my opinion, more difficult because the thing you were doing invites so much external validation.
Oh,
that just compounds the difficulty of it all. Whereas if I'm that new coach and I asked someone if they'll do a coaching session with me and they say no, that I don't, the come down off of that or the disappointment from that is, is frankly nothing like I made 2. 3 million this time. And the next time I make. And everyone tells me how smart I am and everyone tells me how great I am and everyone it's this sort of perpetual standing ovation.
Oh, yeah.
And then it's gone. It's not gone. But
Yeah, it's just when you having to find my worth. I know it sounds so cliche, but having to find my worth outside of my launch worth, my business worth, my productivity worth is, you know, it's the good work. It's the hard work, but I'm glad it's the work. But I always there's that phenomenon with this is what happens with musicians and actors. Like they get the, you're only as good as your last film. You're only as good as your last Oscar.
I can't imagine the pressure that maybe Taylor Swift feels with Like her next release she she's almost created the self concept that she can never fail. I'm pretty sure she's in Enneagram three and I'm just like, Oh God, I just don't, I don't envy, I don't envy the immense pressure that she probably psychologically feels herself of okay the next best song, the next best album, the next best chart topper, the next best tour, the next best, I'm like dear Lord, you know it's hard. So
it's hard, but you've, I was going to say you've come through it. And maybe that, maybe we don't know that yet. I'm pretty confident. The reason I was, the reason I was relieved to have it the old world view finally get broken was because, and I've told you this and I've said this on the podcast and I'll continue to say it. I think that there are people like you, like other clients who I've mentioned on the podcast who are leaders, they're movers of people. And I. I can't have the people movers.
I can't have the leaders. Stop leading or moving. So because that's what you do and People like you, if they're caught up in this this junkie cycle of launching and whatever, that it makes you fragile for the work that I actually hope you'll do in the world. But you've come through it now and I'm watching you.
And even just yesterday we were on our call and I haven't told, I didn't tell you this in the moment, but when you were describing your 197 offer and what you teach in that, I was just thinking, oh that's timeless. Universally applicable. And I was going to say to you, I was like, Oh, I would, I want to tell new coaches to go through that program.
Oh, they probably could and see fantastic results.
And I and I mean it because there's the way you were describing people's first days and weeks in their new project, whether it's coaching or it's a network marketing business, I was thinking. You've made systematic the pieces that everyone has to, and I'm looking to leaders like you to keep doing that for people, but outside of that adrenaline fueled cycle and more just as a like a day job, like this is what we do. We show up, we teach people correct principles that are timeless.
We inspire them to take action. We support them when they're struggling and repeat and repeat forever. And it will help. So I've never worried. Never one day worried that you were going to really fail, whatever that would even mean. I just wanted to see you get out of the launch chaos because I viewed it as the only obstacle to your long term ability to help people in the way that you are capable of helping people.
Oh, I fully agree with you. it's interesting having to rebuild this machine and ensuring we have enough, you know, we have a runway. And I remember when I told you, I was like, hey, you know when we're told that we can, our company can operate at a loss for X number of months and for quite some time. You know, I'm, it's funny. Because of cash
reserves, you mean?
Yeah. It's a weird thing to be proud of, but I'm like, I'm really proud that we've, A, leaned out our business, made some different decisions and that we have bought enough time to write the ship. Because we kept money in our business and we're rebuilding and someone's like, how long do you think it is? I was like, I, you know it's probably a six month to year long project. So it's interesting because I'm launching gives you that dopamine hit.
And I'm like, again, I'm having to find dopamine and other places of my life and business is the place where I'm like, it's interesting. It's where I'm coming to work. It's not where I'm coming to get worth. Whereas like now it's the opposite and this is still my work and it's going to be hard and but it's, yeah, it's been a ride.
Can I ask you a lot
of it?
You've been really generous with your time today. I want to ask you a last question and I hope it's a short enough question to answer. Knowing what you now know and experiencing what you've experienced,, would you say that you are just black and white against? A launch based model, or do you see a way that launching can be done in a way that. The person who's launching can still have mental and emotional health and success and create value and et cetera.
Or because I tend to be very dogmatic anti launching but I hold that loosely because I don't think I'm right. Go ahead.
So I'm moving into a hybrid is so I'm still going to be doing my three days, but what we're doing is we're creating profitability between the launches where there are avenues to nurture support. And care for people between the launches. Cause before it was like, I would have this three day event, very intense. You pay me 9 send you a 2, 000 offer. And then if not you, they'd kind of bounce around with my podcast with, you know, those things., and what I noticed was.
Yeah. There, there was unnecessary struggle and hurt and pain happening between the launches. So I'm like, well, how do I bridge this? So the 197 offer is the bridge offer where it's like, all right, instead of, you know, asking them to suspend their belief. in their ability to make money with this business. I'm going to prove to them that they can make money in this business, help them make money in this business with a very accessible offer of 197 in there for 90 days.
And then they could choose to ascend to our 2, 000 offer. It's going to be different. It's going to be 1, 497. Ascend to that. And then where we're nurturing them between,, and we're opening enrollment, you know, once a month. It's more of a hybrid. So I'm going to call like our launches are going to be more gravy than bread and butter.
So we're building a bread and butter machine with launches being like a community fun aspect, getting back to what I, how it used to feel for me of this is fun, whatever, like whatever we can get from this, that's fantastic. But what I'm trying to solve for right now is like, how do I have all of my, Operational expenses as a business covered by monthly recurring revenue so that our launches are just additional gravy. That's it. And that could be like Dividends or whatever, you know,
yeah, that's really compelling I have one other client who I think in the launch episode or in a follow up I talked about this how and you just said the same thing She said we actually believe our launches are pro community.
Yeah,
and
Yes,
pro brand and there's great energy in them and that if we were to stop launching something Important would be lost from the community
Yes.
So, and I love that. It's very, what you've done is you've essentially given your, you've given launching a different job in your life and your business instead of being pressure filled and being the thing that has to pay the bills. We pay the bills other ways, and this is a way of increasing the positive energy and the trust and the community for the people who engage with us.
Yeah. Exactly. Very
different approach.
Very different. It even feels different. I'm like, oh yeah, we're going to do that at the end of this year, but because I'm solving for what's happening on a monthly basis right now there isn't that pit of dread in my stomach. Yes. I mean, there's, I mean, the pit of dread is more like, when's this going to work out? It's not even, maybe not, and it's not as catastrophic.
It's like we're solving for, and my husband said this, he's I really like That we're now in a model where we can keep solving the problem instead of We can only solve the problem six months at a time, like once every six months. So we can constantly refine the machine and make it better. So in some ways I think it's, I think it serves better to be like, how can I have a smoothly operated machine where I'm constantly honing and refining?
Instead of I have to get this one thing to perform this one time. So yeah, but I'm also going to be like, if you don't have to do the one to many, don't it's over glorified, overhyped. It's not great. If I could do it all over,
I just, you're just going to drop that at the end, as I'm about to sign off.
We can do part two conversations, Kristen and Mark. Kristen telling people. Don't do it.
I mean, maybe that's sufficient right there. Yes. The one to many is just such a different game. So many more moving parts, but hearing it from me, people may believe it, but hearing it from you, you've been in that war and so,
yep.
i'll probably link from the show notes. I would like to send people into The funnel of the hub. It's so funny. I never would say I want to get people into with this funnel But when you describe to me what's in the hub, I thought to myself I should go through that I think it would really benefit me You probably should. You probably love it because the way you talked about how you structure some of the early days of a person's business, I think is really really genius.
So thank you so much for spending an hour with me. And this is such generous use of your time. And I know that this is going to be so useful to so many people. So
you're welcome.
We'll talk to you on our next coaching call.
Yep. Sounds good. Thanks, Mark.
See ya.