Technology's Potential in Sharing Autistic Experiences

Imagine if you could have a glimpse inside my inner world , especially when it comes to navigating life living on the autism spectrum . Here you can include my struggles with language and communication , socialising and forming friendships . I felt inspired watching a BBC series here in the UK . It was titled 'Inside Our Autistic Minds . It consisted of two episodes .

In each episode there would be two autistic individuals who would give us an insight into their lived experiences . What stood out for me in the episodes were powerful presentations created to help show their inner worlds . This got me thinking what if I could do the same ?

In this short episode , I plan to take you on a journey through what my own personal presentation would look like Back in school and my education days . More often than not , I would struggle with language and understanding .

This would create difficulties for me understanding new concepts and understanding what others were asking me to do , along with applying new knowledge . Concepts and words would feel like fragments that I just couldn't quite piece together . This would force me to retreat into my own world to try and make sense and process it all .

This often left me feeling left behind . To visualise this , what I would imagine is a classroom filled with noise of learning . However , for me , what I would have is words floating around like puzzle pieces and have them landing on my desk . I would then struggle to see how they would fit .

I would be hearing directions and explanations from my teacher , but to me they'd be unclear , like trying to see the words through a fog . The way in which I would visualise this scene would be to use a scene that's hazy , with text hardly visible and words breaking apart as I attempted to work out what they all meant .

For the music in the background , I would have a single piano note repeating . The repeats would be slow and echoing . This would be to represent , to show how I would be retreating into my mind to process the world in my own different and unique ways . And next there was my difficulty of trying to make friends at times .

What I would do is I would look on from the sidelines , watching from them , trying to work out how to join in a particular group having a particular conversation , while all the others thought I was a bit strange .

And yet , despite all the challenges , my strengths in mental arithmetic , playing the piano and being good at French all offered me moments where I felt more in terms of connection, and also feel more valued by my peers . The visual description for this scene would be to picture the playground during a break time .

I'd want the scene to have groups of children laughing , talking , playing and having fun . What I would have is myself watching from the side , unsure about how to join in all the fun and activities .

The plan would be to animate this with distant , shadowy figures talking and moving all around , while I have myself standing alone, trying to figure out how to make a first move . I would then have the figures become blurry as I try to focus inward , whilst I would be feeling the weight of being misunderstood .

In this scene, for For the background music , what I would have is a light , tension building sound , maybe with soft strings . This would highlight this section here to build the feeling of anxiety and isolation . And as the lunch hour approached , what I would show is myself heading to quieter spaces like the library area , just to retreat even further inward .

This would be me , highlighting me , trying to find peace in solitude peace in solitude . However , amidst my struggles , there would be moments of positivity . What I would do here is the plan would be for visualising my mental arithmetic skills . What I would do is combine flowing visuals with music .

There would be numbers floating in , gracefully in sync with the rhythm of a soft piano melody . And as the correct answer forms , the music would build . It would become a stronger , more positive force as it filled the room . Finally , at the end , I would be showing myself helping classmates with their French homework .

There would be a calming scene representing the logical and structured way my mind would solve the problems . The final solution would feel like a moment of clarity , highlighted by the energy of the music .

In the case of my piano playing , I'd visualise my fingers gliding over the piano keys , with the music starting off soft and then becoming stronger and a more positive as it filled the room . I do this with musical notes filling the room here . So , yes , here it would be my strengths , giving me a sense of connection that was otherwise very difficult to find .

The music here would change , becoming faster and more upbeat , to be more precise , and perhaps with a fuller piano melody or light orchestral backing , with a variety of instruments in the background , as it got stronger .

This would be the representation of the joy that I would feel when my skills brought me to the attention of my peers , even if it was just for a moment . For any of you who are listening and may feel different or struggle to fit in , always remember that your unique strengths and interests matter very much , even if they're not clear to others at first .

Sometimes it can be differences like these that can allow us to make the most meaningful contributions . It's about finding our own ways to shine and find connections . Through the challenges I faced with language , social cues and isolation, these were hard to navigate .

Despite these , there were moments where I could , through my unique strengths , show the world what I could offer it . This gave me comfort and connection .

If I had the opportunity back during my times of education , if I were to present my inner world , then this is the way , like how I've just described it , an idea of how I would present it , a mix of struggle , retreat and the showing of my strengths .

Looking back , what's clear to me is my journey through education was filled with both struggles and moments of triumph . It is from my struggles with language delays , communication and social challenges, to moments when my strengths would become clearly evident . Each experience here has given me a much clearer understanding of who I am .

While the challenges were real , my abilities in subjects like maths , music like piano playing and learning French have all allowed me to make meaningful contributions to the world . This has all proved that being different doesn't mean one is less capable .

While this is just a short reflection on how I'd present my inner world to you , what it's given me is a lot to think about for the future . Perhaps one day I'll try to create a full version using AI and tools like Leonardo to try and bring all these moments to life .

For now , what I hope this is that it gives you an idea into what it's like inside my autistic mind . If you enjoyed this episode and you felt it resonated with you in some ways , why not feel free to let me know ?

If you have any experiences to share or want to contribute in your own way , then you can text the podcast in the description at my host Buzzsprout , I'm always on the lookout for any contributions to read , and if I do see any , I'll try to get back to you . Until next time , thank you for listening .