Tori’s Back! What Really Happened While She Was Gone

Misspelling with Tori Spelling and iHeartRadio Podcast.

Okay, this is the moment you've all been waiting for. I've been waiting for. This is Misspelling and your host Misspelling is finally back. I'm back, joined by Amy and Ruth and today.

Hi, it's been eight weeks, Tory weeks, so I think that, yeah, welcome back. Ruthann's right, But first of all, what happened? Where? Like, what happened to you? Where have you been? People know you were sick, but what happened exactly?

And thank you for everyone who has reached out and has just wished me the best and get well. It has been hell, and Hell's individual to all of us, but this has been hell. I know I have had a past of getting sick a lot and frequently, but this one took me down eight weeks. I couldn't work. And it all started with my sinuses. I mean it started with the five Petrie dishes that live in my house.

There's entrovirus there is eno.

Rhytovirus, there was COVID, there was everything RSV and.

Did you have it all at the same time.

No, not at the same time.

So like I wouldn't know I had it till one kid was sick again, take them in, they get tested, and then I would get tested and have it. So it was like one week I had RSVP, RCP irish.

Something I did not want to ars. You doesn't get to do get a one.

Yeah, And it was And they always say, I mean after everything started with COVID in twenty nineteen, you know, people started saying it kind of all these viruses attack your weakest thing. So a lot of people that are like, oh, I always had ear infections growing up or bronchid is growing up, but that was your go to health failure. Mine are always my sinuses. And I know I've talked about this for ages, but even growing up, it's always been my damn sinuses.

I have a rude question. Yeah, I'm just gonna rip it off and ask it. Did you have sinus issues before you got your nose done or do you did?

Okay, okay, I did you know?

I always and I talked freely about my rhinoplasty, but it, you know, it definitely is something I'm not happy with, something I'm fearful to get redone again because it's in the middle of my cape.

Have you done it once? Only?

So I did one full one and then I yes, okay, So I'm in the pilot episode, the first episode. Then I'm not the only out of ten seasons, there's only one episode I was not in, and that's the second episode that aired, and I was having my nose done. So it's so uh nine two one zero and Beverly Hills of it all. But yeah, I came back third episode.

Right side of air so you actually feel like you have a better side because of this, The symmetry is off, it really is.

But it's not just physically off, it's internally off. I like, if I plug my nose, I can breathe freely up my right nostril. This left one I can barely get any air up through it. It's so crunched it.

Have you ever had a doctor like look at this?

Definitely?

And in twenty twenty one I had sinus surgery, not for anything, you know, exterior, but to.

Go into season one till twenty twenty one nothing.

I had two revisions to try, okay.

To fix that, and it didn't. It didn't land and still now no, all these years I've been dealing with it, and it sucks, like breathing sucks. I snore really bad, and I'm convinced just because I have like no airway on my left side.

But I have so many questions. Sorry to interrupt, But when you did the first rhinoplasty, yes, in nineteen ninety whatever, it was season one?

Yeah?

Were you bummed or did you like it? At first?

Good question? I don't think. I was so young. And then all of a sudden, on.

A globally populated popular show, I had no time to think about how it looked.

I just had to go.

But I definitely That's when I already had problems with my nose.

I didn't like it. I thought it was too big. I had anxiety about it, But after that I was like it was little.

I would have taken a little bit bigger than like it's totally crooked.

Now, yes, right, I have a question. Did you have the nose job before or after? The parrot bit your nose before?

Before?

Oh so then the parrot damaged it further.

Yeah, maybe this is a past life thing, like there's something with my nose.

Well, this is okay, so interesting, right, why my nose? I asked that because you do get sick a lot, right, which we'll talk about. But this really took you out and it was the worst in many years, and so what did the what were the symptoms, what was happening to you that was really debilitating? And then what did the doctors say about it?

Of course it was the worst flu like symptoms you could imagine. I liken it to when like the bad covid first hit us all and we're like, whoa. I feel like nowadays people say I got covid, sniffles, stuffy whatever, I'm fought brain fog.

I'm back in a few days. It was.

It took me out. I was flat on my back like Mike, and then it got so ingrained in there it went into my U station tube. I sound really smart saying that but that's your inner ear. So it was both sinuses. It was an inner ear infection. You station tube.

So then the vertigo kicked it, which I'm still having vertigo.

Still now, eight weeks later.

Yeah, if I I don't want to do it. If I turn it to the side, to my yep, yep, I start to turn right now, it all starts to spin.

WHOA, Yeah, I get some of that's menopause. I get some of that. But anyway, and mean you think everything that caused well kind is it's.

All combined and.

Do more because that a chiropractic adjustment can help. But you know what, everyone and their mother. Why is it everyone in their mother? Not everyone and their father, everyone in their parent you know, says Oh, I had a friend who had that. My friend was down for three months because I'm like two months. So here's the thing. I was on so many rounds of antibiotics that it

So you're like rinsing with antibiotics.

Correct and that were slowly, slowly but surely.

And I'm talking about like I would go to the doctor, they would do cameras and be.

They could look in there, I could see what was going on. I'm like, oh my god, that's crazy, what's up there? And they were like, oh, it's ten percent better. You know, I told you this, it's ten percent. I'm like, guys, I gotta get back to work. I have five kids.

He was taking care of the kids during all of this, the last two months.

I mean, that's it's a horrible feeling when you were put in the position as a mother or as a parent in general.

Where your kids have to take care of you.

That you know, that's something we think comes later in life, and you're like, one day you're gonna have to and it's like, but not yet. So it was a really hard transition. So did Dean help definitely? My ex husband super helpful. Yeah, really really well.

But you don't have any other you don't have a nanny, you don't have any babysitters. Obviously. I know Liam and Stella are right.

Stella is driving now, so she was, you know, when she's able to she's a senior and doing all of her senior.

Stuff as well. She made the honor role. I'm super proud of her.

She's had to, you know, change her schedule to go pick up Bow from elementary school.

Like it's it's been a shift, but.

You have no other help.

I don't, and I don't think anyone believes that.

But it's like it's it's true, and not that I haven't in the past, of course, you know, but at this point, you know, in my world, financial world, I don't, and it's kind of everything happening at once, so it's like I can't.

Go down again.

But yeah, So during those two months, like who was making dinner and doing all that kind of stuff.

And this is the part that was heartbreaking to me because I publicly said, you know, after separation and going through the divorce, I was like, I can't cook, and I didn't cook for two years and it was all ordering in or going out. And then I got really back into it and the kids were thriving, they were helping with it, and it made them you know, I'm

Right, Yeah, so there's all that, but.

Yeah, I couldn't cook, so we had to go back to ordering it again, and I'm like, I'm sorry. I kept saying every day, I'm sorry, guys. I'm hoping tomorrow I'll feel better and cook again. And it kept going like, let me ask you.

These questions because there's like a sort of a bigger picture happening here. So you're feeling physically like poopoo do doo.

It was so bad that the kids couldn't like I couldn't even like come downstairs, like they would have to help me walk to the bathroom to pee, like it was outrageous, and you.

Feel like exertionally, emotionally, how are you feeling during all this?

Oh, emotionally And you know, and everyone out there knows, I'm a really positive person, Like you know, I've been through this lifetime and I go up and down and I keep going, keep on trucking.

I got real to a point where I felt really hopeless, and I never lost hope.

Like for me to say that, because it gets to the point where you're just it's depressing being in bed. I remember I used to think, like, oh, I have so much on my plate, it'd be so nice to have me time and just go like.

Relax before you got before I got sick. And now I'm like PTSD.

I'm like, please, I don't want to be back up in that bed again, because it just.

First of all, like I couldn't even watch.

How did you get yourself out of that sort of depression?

It was, honestly, I it came back because the physical just started being, the steps started coming back. Like I remember saying to Ruth Dan, I feel so sick. I mean, I'm gonna cough now saying that that's weird. I feel so sick that mentally it's like this bubble. I'm in this brain fog, this body fog. I felt like I wasn't in my own body. And I said, I'm worried I've lost all my humor and wit, like I like, I'm a smart girl, and what if that's all gone forever.

She's like, it's not gone, for.

It's not gone, but it is like just so so people know it is You're not like you don't have your A game yet, you know what I mean, Like you're getting.

There would you call this a B minus?

No, this is this is pretty good what you're doing now. But like we've talked and full sweeting here. No, but I would say, like we've been talking and like, yeah, you're not one hundred person. No I'm not so so I have like so many personal questions.

But like, look, what was the tulterier like to just quit?

Like there was right, but I'm not a question you know that. No, right, you're and you're coming back. But like over the last two months, Look, you work with us, iHeart it's like a salary, right, so you're getting paid, but like you do a lot of work that are like one off's here and we know you had to cancel a thing in Vegas and one off here because should pay your bills if you because it's not like you work like a normal job like other people do. So how like how is that stress?

Well, I mean that's always stress because I feel like in the entertainment industry it's and no one understands this. It fluctuates.

You know, you don't have a nine to five, you don't have a guarantee yearly salary. Closest to having my guarantee salary is with my iHeart family and my two podcasts. So other than that, you know, it's kind of goes ebbs and flows, but you got to be out there and be consistent and be relevant. So for me, I was also laying in bed beating myself up, like I've just on and this is my health is important, my

They're like, oh, I chose a quieter life.

I decided to go to college for a year, and then it's like, oh they're gone, you know.

Yeah, yeah, okay, So I think the thing I want to ask you about, and Tory knows we're going to.

Sort of talk about this. Yeah, you get sick a lot. Yeah, this was particularly bad. But this also was sort of that moment where Ruth Anne your manager, and I your team that I.

Heard were like my friends, I mean.

Your friends, Yeah yeah, no, no, no, of course, Jenny, I want to give, like you know, Jenny has to take over when you're out and just totally fine to do. How much do you think sort of your lifestyle plays into why you get sick so much.

I definitely am a believer that physical is physical, but emotional and your cortisol and the stress, it all just weighs on you. So everything that I have going on, you know, internally, externally, all plays apart in how well received. You know, these terms come in, I can fight them off. Like, if I'm so depleted emotionally, if I'm so depleted physically, if I'm so stressed out and not getting the proper sleep, obviously I'm gonna fall into the portion of people that

It's there. It shouldn't be there.

Two months later, so immunologists, I went, did a slew of blood work and there's already markers. They're still getting the back of major immune disorders. So I don't know if that means autoimmune. We're still figuring it out. We'll know in the next one.

Well, that's sort of what you have to keep exploring.

Right, And that's going to be a huge component because realistically, while I have to like get myself in good health, I have to keep the train moving. So it's going to going forward, be a balance and try to balance, whereas before I just you know, whatever sticks to the wall sticks and just keep going, Like.

You need to change the way you live, Like was this sort of like a rock bottom or like a you know, awakening, like I need to change the way I live?

Well, I definitely, I mean, ruth Anne knows this. I had put myself last when it goes to this is general stuff that everyone does, going to get your yearly checkup, going to the guy of colleges, going, you know, do you do any of that?

I do now?

No. No.

I dragged her physically to a few dogs and during.

The last two months that you got sick of this before.

So I wasn't. But ruth Anne has really been on me in a good way, in a supportive, friend loving way, like hey, you don't have your health, you don't have anything else, And I'm like, yeah.

You're right, you're right. So I would say like five four months before I got really sick, I had started to go.

She was taking me, you know, I got Yeah, I got my Mamograham, I went to guide in collegist, I got a new internist, like I was setting the stage to succeed.

Why do you think you put all that stuff off so much?

I can tell you honestly and not that it's right. But there's no right or wrong that I was just like, I barely have time to set appointments for my children with my work schedule and dealing with them. I have to put myself last. So when they're up to date on everything, because the last three years has been a shit show for us, then I'll.

Go back to me. But they always say put the oxygen mask on first, which I don't really believe in, but in this case, yeah.

I mean, I will just agree here.

In all the years I've known Tory, everything else has come first, and intentionally or unintentionally, you have come last.

Yeah, taking care.

Of yourself, and it doesn't work anymore.

It's it's you know, I don't think it's common for people with kids to, you know, forget about themselves and put their kids first.

But yeah, I do preach, what do you say your health.

Your health is everything and if you're not healthy, there's no way you can take care of your kids.

So that and I didn't forget about myself. I always in my brain would be like, Okay, come on, you need to get to a gynecologist. You're supposed to get your yearly paps married, and like I knew what to do, but I didn't do it.

Would you say your life is messy chaotic?

It's definitely chaotic, messy. I mean we all know that.

I always say that I have like tons of shit piled everywhere, and like, esthetically it's messy, but I don't know if you really dig into it, if it's messy.

And this is where we disagree.

But you don't know what my kids go through and what because I.

Like fundamentally disagree because I love.

You so hard on myself and I will repeat to everyone, oh my life's a mess I'm a shit show.

But it is messy. Tory like that's the thing that I almost want you to look at.

Is going Can I talk to you? Do you know? And it's not because it's me. They're like, do you know what? Like they put things into perspective.

Of how well this child is doing and they are thriving, and that's because of you. You run this show like internally, like stop beating yourself. Everyone knows I'm a mess.

You're not a mess, but your life is chaos. Like That's what I kind of want to say, is like I feel like we've been sugarcoating this. And again, people can be mad at me for being tough, but we've talked about this before. It's like I think we've sugarcoated this for two years, Like we was kind of like putting a band aid on it, a band aid on it, a band aid on it. Two things can be true. The kids can be thriving in school, even at home, they can be perfectly happy, while life is still a

I know, I know it's not what I want, and I know it's not how I'm thriving.

My kids are doing great and they're getting by, but it's like, gosh, there's so many things.

If I had moments or people or someone to help, I could change this and we could change it around pretty quickly. Like I have no doubt, and I think I am held back a lot by myself but because of my situation, and it's like there's got to be a way. You know, I need a mother's helper, like, but then I'll be right.

Well, it's the hardest part right now. Is it like needing money to be able to pay for like privileges, life's extra things that most people can't have, but you would like to be able to have. I think you said something that really landed on me. The kids are getting by, Yeah they are, but like getting by isn't necessarily what you want.

Right And I think I my instinct is to like put more blame on myself than there is. So I mean, you know, Stella making the honor roll, like she's thriving, She's not just getting by, she's you know, applied to college and like we're doing all.

Of that stuff.

But the one thing I would love to eliminate is they worry about me because we live in a situation. And you know, I grew up believing I tried to raise my kids when they were younger and we had help.

That they wouldn't have to deal with the stuff like to hear about finances here stressed, I am, oh my god, this just happened. I to do this, but I have to go pick this one up.

And you know, Lia and my son, who is eighteen, I'd be like, mom, deep breath and I'm like, okay, you're right, I'll take a deep breath.

And he's like, how can I help? And it's just it's just I feel weird. I did it first, it did I don't.

I wouldn't like.

And now I'm like, I'm grateful. I'm like, yeah, I can't do this alone. And that was a hard thing to face. Like I spent years being like I can do it all, and I can't.

No one can do it all.

Like how much is Dean help? Fifty percent or no way, not fifty percent?

Oh, I mean he works, so he works full time and his is more of a nine to five job.

Okay, okay, so he just drop offs in the morning, which help.

Yeah for sure.

When that changed, that was like a game changer for me. When he took that drop offs anti gaps I get so I still have to do pickups and Stella driving was a game changer for me because we have a.

Car, two cars and has car schools before that does still have a car, still has a car, okay, because.

It's look from the outside, people are like Tori Spelling, Aaron Spelling's daughter, you know, like she's got it all. It's Gucci and you know Dior, But like.

It is that right, and it's interesting.

I feel like my name is very polarizing in a way because there's half the people still think that and then half for like I thought, she's broke right right right?

You know, situation, What is the real situation and what do you need the most? What would actually help you make the chaos not so so high.

So my brain is more creative.

My brain is go, go, go, go go, Like if you have if someone has to think and plan out, I'm like I already already handled it.

So just having honestly another set of hands. Yeah, at the.

House or driving too like both.

I think I mean somebody who can pick up the kid and go to the grocery store and help you go through the boxes and sort of a somebody who can do it all in that moment.

We talked about this the other day, like how and I don't think the house is dirty. I don't think that. But I think the house is messy. I think because you have a real, real problem, and like everybody that he does, but I think yours is extreme on getting rid of stuff, letting stuff go. Is that a fair assessment?

Partially? So the letting go used to be the entire problem. Yeah, and that's when I did have the help, So I wish I had let it go. Then now I want it all gone, Like I just physically don't have the time. I will come in and be like okay, and when I do, I'll have one hour and I will do step it and my kids are like, oh my.

God, that looks great, and I'm like, oh thank you.

I'm like okay, this weekend and then all of a sudden, there's play dates, there's you know, hangs, they got to do this, they got to do that. I'm working on stuff business wise because I'm not a nine to fiver or so there is twenty four to seven business. When it comes up, it comes up, and it just doesn't get done. Like I'm not the type of stay at home mom that it's.

Like, okay, I have while the kids are at school.

I have this chunk of time where I can just sit down, clean my house and do laundry.

But like I'm doing this podcast, which.

I'm in the corner of my living room, formal living rooms, i am no longer a believer in they're just a collector of shit because literally it's like the kids don't use them if there's not a TV, and formal living rooms never have a TV allegedly, you know from the past, Like it's beautiful furniture here, but no one uses it. It is turned into I would say, my gifting suite. So when I am looking at.

Death that comes in and it's just a bunch of piles right, and I will be like, Okay, would you take a picture of it or would you be embarrassed? That's the question.

I can take a picture of it right now, text send.

Me a picture of it, and okay, And then there's a difference between sending me the picture, and would you post the picture? And I'm not saying you have to. I'm just curious, like because I think personally you did get sick, you got really, really sick, and we're all we're all supportive and here for you and wanted to help. But no, I'm not looking at that. I appreciate that,

No, I'm scared right now. I see fear in her eyes.

It's not good.

I've seen the files and I think my problem is I have known you for so long that whereas other people might walk in and be like, wow, that's a lot, I can tell when you've actually made some progress.

I'm like, oh, this doesn't look so bad.

Oh it's not good, and I don't want to be mean. But the Christmas tree is up, the Christmas and you can.

See you thought I cut that out.

You can see the bones in here, Like the shelves could be really pretty, the living room could be really pretty. You have beautiful things. You can't even sit in there. No, Like it's borderline hoarder. I'm not gonna lie.

Yeah, it's all just sitting in here in piles.

So would this be the first thing? Okay? Like, because kind of what we want to do with the show is because basically your life is chaos. Do we not want to try to address this because other people listening, Look, I think I have two stacks of shit at my house right Sorry for saying shit, two stacks and they and they do bog me down. I'm like, I have to get to this. Maybe when I'm watching the football game, I'll get to this. You have four hundred stacks of

I believe.

So this seems to be like really a problem.

Yes, as I believe, Like you walk into your home that should be your like safe space and like peaceful.

As soon as I walk into the foyer, I see this.

The whole house look like this and the weight No, it doesn't look this is the worst.

It's like we have.

A den which is connected to the kitchen, and it's where you know, everyone hangs and sits and eats. That's clean, but that's the one place we keep and everything just goes in here.

Say, like the president of iHeart was like, we love Tory Spelling. I need to have a meeting with her to talk about her future. Tell her I'm gonna stop by her house, no tomorrow night. What would you do?

I would have to pass and here's I would be like, you have to meet him.

You'd absolutely say no.

Like am I getting fired? If I don't know?

Pretend fine, pretend I have to talk somewhere.

Yeah, I'd be like where I'll come to you wherever you are. I would change everything.

Just and you never like what if someone knocked on the door, Like what if I was just like I'm in town Tory knock, knock, knock, Like, are you gonna just not let me in?

No?

Of course I would.

Okay, pretend it's not me, Pretend it's somebody, like do you not have people over?

Like?

How do you like?

No?

I stopped having What if your brother wants to come over?

Does he come into this?

He's been here?

He go?

Because I picture his house is not is very buttoned up. I think one toy comes out at his house and one toy goes back.

Definitely, I would say Dean is neat and tidy and really good at organizing.

His brain works that way. So oh sorry, hold on, I don't know.

I thought dad was picking up bo No, I don't either. Can you just sext him? I'm so sorry, Thank you stuff.

I'm very happy that happened, because that's what I'm talking about. That's tough stuff. Like you're trying to do a podcast. We have thousands and thousands and like literally we have twenty five thousand people probably listening right now, and you have to stop what you're doing.

Yea.

And again I'm not trying to be tough on you. No, you're just like swirlly for me.

And if you saw the text chains with me and my kids, Me and my axe, me and each kid individually, like I'm at actually doing great with organization, like making sure that everything is planned out because otherwise. So what I was going to say is when Dean and I were together and live together, I was able. I was able to have a house that was presentable because he wouldn't live like that.

You know.

And we were working at different times, so I had downtime when he'd work he had to do help them too.

I'm sorry, did you have help then?

Yeah? I mean, look, I'm not young. Here's what I'm going to say. I'm I'm one person, right, I'm one person, and I'm just going to be vulnerable and tell you the truth. I have no kids, and I have five nieces and I do a lot of like stuff with them. I have a housekeeper, someone cooks for me. I have a full time assistant, I have a handy man, I have someone that does my whole yard, and I still have two piles of shit. Like, I do think you

It definitely impacts your nervous system, impacts everything, of course.

And we're all in San Francisco right now, and you are supposed to be here and you're not here because two reasons. One is you couldn't be here, but you've got all this swirl, so we can't have you here. And I don't want a book a flight and I don't want to buy you a ticket because I don't think you'll make it. And that's just me being vulnerable right to say. I want you to be at all these things. I want you to have a thousand more opportunities. But because of the swirl, I'm always like, oh ooh,

I definitely want to, yeah, because I I mean, I love all my work with iHeart, but I have a ton of other business things that I do, and it's.

Me and Ruth.

Anne's the two of us, you know, and she doesn't even live that at local, you know, she's an hour away, So it feels.

Like an excuse to me. That feels like I just said something and then you're just pivoting it to like, oh, but I have all these other work things I have to do and I have to balance it all. When I'm like, I think it's because.

You've got it. I want to say, yes, I need someone, send help.

But also, do you see what I'm saying, ruth Anne, am I wrong? Like where they're sort of like it's just sort of I want it.

I want help.

I think recognize in all honesty.

I can't do this alone. I need help literally, Like.

I think, can't you find me somebody forever?

Like it's you need people part time assistant to you know.

A mother's helper. I someone I say all the time, do you know someone? I asked moms at school, like and it's it's outstanding that I'm like, really, nobody has one person they con a few hours a week.

Right, But I feel like that's not going to be hard to find someone else.

Be surprised, you'd be surprised they are.

Not asking the right people.

I mean, I don't know, Ruthan and I have been asking people for this before I got sick.

Kids I don't have like you. I do not have kids. I'm not in those circles.

I need a mother's helper, I need an assistant, I need a handyman.

We'll always want to see me. Let me know. One's local.

Course.

Also like okay, So I think the question is if you start to get those things, do you think that you can really stick with some of these things? For example, we bring someone in, let's say on the podcast where like we got to help just saying like you keep all this. I get it. It's hard to like give away the stuff because that could be a gift or what I take it. But do you think you could keep it up? That's the thing. It's not just about the clean time of yeah, because then when it comes

Well here's yes. But here I'm not defending myself.

I'm being factual and realistic, so we can work this out together. Totally, totally my life's my my busy, chaotic work and children. Lifestyle is not going to change. In fact, in the next year, there's going to make things coming up.

It's going to be escalated. So I need to be in my a game.

And once someone comes in and does all this, yes, I can maintain it if I have someone.

Here helping me.

Mm hmm.

Again, if someone comes in and we go through the house and we donation, this is giveaway, this is an organize it.

I'm still going to be moving, moving, moving, and not have time. If more brocks has come in, it just could put over here.

But if we have an area and there's a place for everything and someone is actually helped, and I know because I've had this in the past and my life has not been like.

This, right, so I have no question. We're taping this at two o'clock. So we're taping this at two o'clock today. What was the day like before we started whatever? Half hour? By the way, I'm having a massive hawk wash.

But anyway, know is there air blow down your shirt?

So what was the day like leading up to one point when we started this?

Let me put up thank you Easton got.

A fan going.

It's grateful at least I'm on a calendar now. I used to have it all in my head, which was impossible, impossible, and it was like this weird thing. It was like my dad used this archaic but wonderful because I have it typewriter and they would show him like.

Here's a here's a computer. We could do it. And he was like his brain, like.

Where's that typewriter. That typewriter should be like displayed beautifully on a beautiful I know it was at desk in your home office. I don't know. I don't know what the situation is, but like you don't want to shove it a corner corner.

I realized this, and uh wait, where was I going with this? Oh?

What was your day? Like day up to now? And I was like, let people be se I get it.

We'll take at seven am, get bow up, bo got ready, got bow ready. Dean then came and picked him up and took him, and then Finn and Hattie went to school, and who took them? Dean came back and took them.

Oh that's nice. Okay, so that's nice.

And then I had a call from ten to eleven, I had a call from twelve to one, and then I'm here with you call too, So what.

Did you do all morning till ten breakfast? I don't know. I'm just asking.

Oh, I fought with Mona, my chat GPT.

Ruthan knows this. Do you know Canva the app canvas?

I know Canva?

Yeah, so Mona, my g chat GPT has been trying to teach me how.

To learn it because for all the things I'm doing and designing, I need to do brand decks. But I don't have an assistant to help me make a brand deck. So I can come up with all these ideas, Mona can structure it for me. And then she's like, okay, I can't go any further to put this into a PDF or print it out for you.

So you have to go into Canva.

She's given me step by step how to use Canva, and I'm just like, three hours.

Feels like a giant waste of time to me, like you could literally pay someone fifty dollars to do what she's doing now.

What she is doing now.

So I finally said to ruth answering, this deck is ready to go. I need it to put it in Canva and have it look the right way, right font spacing, it's ready to go and I don't know how to do that, and she was like, Okay, we just need someone to do it, and we reached this.

I don't know what's doing it.

I hope people listening like chime in because I get irritated by all this, So you guys, like, I don't know, like it just all irritates me. It's like Tory like where I don't know if I'm just grouchy no, or if I'm if other people listening will agree, Like I feel like there's all this swirl again when it's like, dude, nobody, I don't know how to use canva. Somebody can just help you with that?

Or is this somebody?

You have fifty million people that work at iHeart it's easy Like for me, I'm like, and trust me, I've been tempted.

I don't want to bother anyone there, but.

All the millions of people that work there that are all so efficient and great.

I want to be like, do you have a friend or a cousin that just.

That they're doing that's the whole thing they do. But it's okay, So we're gonna have to take a break because I'm exhausted, and this is before we go. Are you doing therapy?

I'm starting back with therapy.

Again. This feels it just feels.

You want me to be honest.

I could lie, yes, So what happened to the therapy?

So I didn't do therapy for the two months I was sick, But I'm also previous to that had canceled my therapy. I want to say, for about a month before that. And why because as usual, things would come up and I'd be like, I'm sorry, I can't do it today.

This came up, all right, But it's like it's hard because I feel like a lot of people have an inner circle that are in close proximity, like you know, they can call their mom or they call their sister, call you know, their best friend that lives two minutes away, and be like, I hear my other friends, Like my friend Kim that does my hair. She's a single mom working.

She has to constantly be like, I can't pick up my kid and call her friend that lives down the street to go pick them up.

I don't have that. My brother lives important.

I get it, I get it, all right, excuse me A lot to take in, Okay, people listening. I'm really curious how they feel, because they're either going to be like, Amy, you are a bitch and you need to be nicer, or they're going to be like, we get it, Tory's got a lot of chaos. Let's they get it. Or they also could relate. They might be like, I too have these same issues.

I think there's going to be a chunk of people who relate. I think it's a little bit of all what you just said.

And I'm not just saying that, you know, because I'm close to Tori. I mean I see it up close, and look, toy knows a lot of it drives me crazy, but it's from a place because I can, and I think it's the same with you. I mean, like we cave, of course, and so it's frustrating.

We are to succeed.

Yeah, I want you to succeed, want life to be easier. I want to come in and fix it.

Right.

It's tough because my friend who's also I'm in business with, hasn't worked in two months. So we have to call our other friend, Brian, make Brian cover, which look, I love Brian and I'm so grateful to him, and he always is such a good friend to you because he's always going to save the day. But it's like it's a lot of work because I have to get Brian or someone else to fill in. And like Denise Richards was amazing, and we were so lucky that people were able to jump in.

Cheryl Burke did it. We had a bunch of people super great.

But it's like not only that that the team has to then find that person and then someone for them to talk to. And I'm not mad at you for being sick. Obviously that would be like insane, I'd be bonkers, but it's still tiring, and we want you to get better and then we want you to like come back a game. So we're sort of just all like, okay,

And you're Brian Green, who.

Was a super best friend and my hobby on camera off camera has been such a best friend and family to me through this entire process. He checks in every day.

He just checked it. He Brian I started this podcast, I would feel so guilty, like, oh my gosh, you're stepping in for me again. He's like, I've got your back.

Oh he'll be fun. Look you don't have to feel guilty about it. But gratitude is different than feeling guilty. And like Brian is the greatest. We're so lucky to like both of us have Brian in our lives.

Like he's sure, yeah, just now, he's like, how's the vertigo. I'm like, I'm still having it. He just sent me.

Because he he's out the fertigo for for a long time, really bad.

And he just makes me his vertigo doctor who I'm going to make an appointment with.

So well, I'm tired, but.

We'll get it.

We'll get it. We're gonna come back at this again. So all right, step one.

And we think, let your help everyone out there, Like I'm really willing to go through this with you because you know, keeping a facade and like telling my funny stories which happened, like oh my god, this happened daily, Like this this stuff does happen and having great celebrity guests like you were saying, Amy, it's great.

I mean it still does not deliberate.

I think, yeah, I think we need to like try to see if we can sort of figure this out because and and look, I think you think your swirl is like a four out of ten, and I think your swirl is an eight out of ten. I think it's so even if we meet in the middle, it's like a six, five, Like it's so much swirl.

It it's definitely more than a four like we had swirl during the podcast.

Like during the podcast, there was an example all right, well this isn't negative, it's positive, but it's just like.

This is a count of ability and this is going to help with follow through anyway.

We'll see where it all goes.

Stay tuned.