Misspelling with Tory Spelling and iHeartRadio podcast. It is August, and I don't think I've ever been so excited for it to be August because that means summer is almost over. Oh my gosh. As a mom of five, I couldn't wait for summer to get here. I was so excited. And I think predominantly because there's okay. So here's my thing. Although I wake up really early us. I used to be like a late sleeper, like worked really hard when I was filming nine o two and zero and like
we would have four am calls crazy early. But then on the weekends, I was that girl that could sleep till like one o'clock. Oh gosh, could sleep so well. And then once I had kids, it's just that like internal maternal clock. I just wake up like five six am. But I'm not a get out of better. And they say that when you wake up, you're supposed to it's your body saying it's time to literally get up, and you're supposed to like get up and go and do something.
But I will wake up, but I will just lay in bed and just like talk to myself in my head for like hours. It's probably it's probably not a good thing. It's like my built in like therapy session doesn't end well. But that notion of being able to wake up and just lay there is really nice during the summer because the kids, on the other hand, they are still young, so they'll sleep like all day during summer.
But knowing that we have to wake up at like six am and get back to that grind, that schedule of school always throws me off because then I literally have to physically get up and get everyone out the door. But summer has been long, Oh my gosh, because at least when they're on a schedule, I have a little bit of like my life back. But then when I'm just with them twenty four to seven, and I don't know about moms out there and dads probably agree with me.
But they eat more during the summer because they're always home. They're not like those set meals like breakfast, like school lunch, dinner. It's just like constant snacking. So your fridge is always just like looks like it's just been ravaged and it's a tough one. So it's August, which means they're going back to school next week. Next week. Yeah, I'm really excited. I am really excited to get back to that school schedule.
So summer we are on a vacation. We had like our summer vacation and it's been beautiful and amazing, but it's challenging. I feel like going on a vacation with kids of so many varying ages. So I have eighteen, seventeen, thirteen, twelve, and eight, and when they're little, you can just like play with them in the pool and hang out, but
varying degrees. There's like so much there's so much teen drama going on, like it follows you to vacation, and then you know there's like the boys at the pool and the girls are like snapping them, like give them my snap, and it's just it's been a lot. But my eight year old as amazing as our vacation has been, and we're so grateful to be able to take a vacation. But he said to me, today is our last day.
And he said, he said, Mom, you know what I really wish, And I said what He said that I could just stay in the hotel room all day and I go, but you're on vacation. You can do that at home. And he said, Mom, I have been sitting in the sun at the pool for seven days. I was like, poor guy. Yeah, but I tell you I'm really tired too, so I was like, yeah, I guess
we could just stay in. So I think my new rule of thumb for like next vacation is I will just get a big screen with like tropical backgrounds and it'll be showing like the beach in the ocean, and they could just stay on their phones in a room with that, like I it would cost less. I think that's gonna be my new rule of thumb if you guys had any like creepy hotel stories, because I was just thinking of this this morning when I woke up.
So my body internally just wakes up. And I don't know about you, but my body wakes up at the same time every single day. So it wakes up at three thirty three am, which they say three is like the witching hour. I don't know what that means, but I think there's some theory about why our bodies wake up at the three o'clock hour, but I don't really know it. And I wake up at six eighteen. I should probably look this up because it probably means something.
So every single day it's like Groundhog's Day. I wake up at three thirty three am and six eighteen. Well, I wake up at other times during the night because now I'm old, So I pee during the night a lot, not like pe like not like pee the better or anything, but like I have to get up and go pee. And I think that's just like an age thing. I mean, not like I'm old, but like I just my bladder holds less. Or maybe because I've had five kids. It could just be that. I like saying that that sounds better,
it makes you sound younger. But yeah, what was my point. Oh so when I woke up at six eighteen this morning, I was remembering because I was looking at the I was like, oh, we're so lucky to be in this amazing hotel. And then I was just thinking how unnatural hotels are because people you don't know, it's just like they're turning over people staying in a hotel room over and over and over again, and it just it doesn't
feel or seem natural in any way. And I was thinking about the creepiest hotel story I ever had, and it was one time when Dean and I were together. We were in Toronto and we were filming and we went and stayed. We had like two days off, so we're like, oh, let's go stay at this this amazing
like Victorian hotel or something. So we went and stayed at this hotel and I think it was me and Dean and my dog and it was like the most prestigious like hotel in Toronto and old school and beautiful, and we were like, okay, we've been working hard, like, let's just we ordered in room service and we were going to watch a movie. And I'm not even sure how we found it, but we found a toe plot twist. Didn't see that one coming? Did you or hear that
one coming? We literally found like a severed big toe in the oh I remember the story now. So it was me and Dean and my dog Muso, and Muso found something and we were laying in bed watching a movie and we just finished dinner and we found something and he was chewing on something at the end of the bed and we're like, what does he have? And we kind of went back and forth like did he get our food? Like did you find a bone near? Like what is he chewing on? So I went and
like grabbed it out of his mouth. And that's when I found it was a severed human big toe. And the creepy part is it wasn't that old, like, it wasn't that decayed, and it was like precisely chopped off. So imagine that call like down to the hotel like excuse me. You know they're used to getting problems. People complain incessantly about, you know, things in hotels, like little things like the air is not working or like, you know,
silly stuff like excuse me, we have a problem. They're like, oh, yeah, what and we're like, we found a human big toe in our bed. Yeah, So then do you guys have any opinion on this? All my amazing producers listening to this right now.
I mean my mouth is like on the floor.
You can't unsee that, like ever, Like I can picture that big toe right now.
I don't know how I didn't know this story.
I told this story, but I have never told this story. And it was I think, if I remember correctly, like it was it was definitely I think a male big toe, but it was like chopped off and it wasn't like decaying, and the nail bed was fine. You don't have a thing about nail buds. Or toe beds. I guess as well. It was. It was nice, but the hotel like kind of had no reaction. They were like, oh, we're so sorry, so we like put it in like a napkin from our dinner and like Dean brought it down to them.
But you guys, we never got like I would have been horrified. It would have been like I'm so sorry, like the whole stay is free, or like I don't even know how you make up for having a human toe in somebody's bed. But all I know is I think they gave us a credit if we ever stayed there again, ever stayed there again, like you're never gonna stay there again. But yeah, wait, should I have like called the police.
I was gonna say, I'm shocked that the police weren't called to investigate like that. There wasn't a murder and there's other body parts to tributed around the hotel.
And did you say it was in the bed. I'm not sure because Musso had it in the bed, so I'm not sure if he found it under the bed. If he found it in the bed, you didn't at the end of the bed.
You didn't demand to have your roomage.
Isn't that the crazy thing? No, we didn't. I can't even remember why we stayed in that room. I think it was like late and we were just so tired from working. We're like like turn a blind toe to it and just move on. But yeah, I'll tell you the hotel afterwards. But like, it's like a prestigious hotel in Toronto. Oh my god, we should have put in a ziplock bag. I could have. Oh my god, I've always wanted to solve a murder. I've always been into
like crime and stuff. That could have been my one chance to put in a ziplock bag to go to the police station and I could have solved a murder. Well I missed out. Anyway, things you should think about when you're at a hotel because I don't know, and I don't think it's natural stay in a hotel where people have stayed over and over and over again. Have you ever had any ghost stories at hotel?
You?
Do? You have like a bad one? No?
Well, it was just annoying, and I mean, I don't know if it's a real ghost story, but it's a haunted hotel. And the light kept going on all night and had to get up and turn it off and then would just come back on.
Oh see, I love stuff like that. I mean, now when you're trying to sleep, I guess that's annoying. But I like every hotel I go to, that's always like my first question, but maybe like my second or third, like it's your hotel haunted? Like we're the end. Remember we were at that hotel and we asked if it was haunted? Where were you not Rhode Island?
Well, yeah, Rhode Island.
And then is that the one fall? And I always look up when I'm going to a hotel, not always when I think about it, I like Google, like is
this hotel haunted? But then I feel a lot of the times you ask them, like that hotel we were at was at the Rhode Island Run and we asked them when we checked in because I looked it up and it was like one of the you know, five haunted hotels in Rhode Island, And we asked them at the front desk and they were like, no, nothing, And I'm like, no, no, no, You're listed as one of the most haunted hotels here. And she was like, I've
never heard that. I've worked here for ten years and I was like, oh okay, Like are they supposed to like make people feel good and not tell them it's haunted. I don't know. Our hotel doesn't have a second floor. Usually it's the thirteenth floor, so maybe something happened on the second floor. I don't know. That sounds more exciting.
I was still the second floor, even if it doesn't say as much.
Now, well, just like it's still the thirteenth floor. If you skip from twelve to fourteen, it doesn't matter.
I know my parents building in New York where I grew up does not have a thirteenth floor, just goes twelve fourteen, and it just feels like we must be living in a different time that that still exists is crazy.
So fourteen is actually thirteen. It doesn't matter. You can change the number. It's still that floor, still thirteen, Still thirteen. Bose listening, He's like, are you laughing? Oh my gosh, this is me. You can't really see me right now, or if you can't, just won't make it into a social club. But I've like given up. I have no makeup on, I have no nails on, natural hair, I don't know an end of summer, like do like moms just give up. We're just like, oh, and I don't
want to back to school. Shop like I don't want to do that. I had a friend that told me once, sorry, I'm going back to the how vacations are overrated because kids at their age just don't want to do anything.
I had a friend once that told me that that she her kids were younger, she would wait till like nighttime, till they were all falling asleep with them in the car, and like drive and they were asleep, and they would actually go to a staycation like a little airbeyen beer or something cheap, and they would tell the kids that they had driven like twenty four hours some like magical place, and that's how they saved money. But I guess when
they get older, you can't do that. That's a good one though, right the kids wake up in the morning, you're like, you're here, You've driven like one block. I should have tried that one when my kids were younger. Maybe I still have money. AnyWho. So the hotel we're in right now, it's a very lovely hotel, but it's the bed is up against a wall and then the wall has the like lighting wisconces and then it goes up and there's like a shelf way up at the top.
So the other night, and I'll blame it on dessert bo it had too much chocolate ice cream and he thought he was Spider Man. So he was scaling the wall because it's like a pad it wall and it has grooves and he was like rock climbing, but onto it.
And he got up to the top shelf where it is and he was like ew, We're like what And it was filled with dust, So like they never clean up there, which is really gross because that dust, if it just accumulates on that top shelf, it's going to hit the shelf, pile up, and when it gets too high, it's going to fall over on you and you're sleeping all the way down there. Is that gross? And we're at like a four star hotel, So like it makes me question every hotel you should complain a five star hotel?
Boat what does that mean? Five star? I was saying four stars, so I'm more relatable what that means really good? Well or not? There's dust at the top of it. I had a friend that used to bring like pack the what light is it? The black light? I'm pretty sure.
You don't want to do any hotel room.
You don't want to do it because you're always going to find something you don't want to see. Used to pack, like the black light and gloves and lights all over sand. That's you, isn't it. I'm just kidding. Oh my god, we band Remember that hotel we were at in my agropas. I'm proud of it.
I travel with a little can of life fall wherever I go, and and that hotel was so frightening. I did need to use the lysol on the headboards, remember that?
Remember why oh the headboard, because then we looked closer and there was like handprints in like a milky like opaque, like ooh. Again. We didn't change rooms, We stayed.
Yeah. We didn't think that there was a much of a selection in that place. Actually, I don't think they had any other rooms, remember remember.
Yeah, no, you're right, Yeah it was our friend.
Yeah yeah, bad scene all the way around.
But I think they bank on you, like traveling so far that you're so tired that you're going to just let things slip by Oh my gosh, I should, I should. I could have liked that presidential suite for like the rest of my life if I had really gone to town on that big toe, Like now I'm mad about it all over again. Now it's like fifteen years later, should I say maybe I should call that hotel.
I think you should have them opened a murder infication.
If this is a live radio show, we could get that hotel on right now. I'll be like that poor person answered the phone. Like, by the way, I was there fifteen years ago there was a toe. Now I'm sad about it as well, because there could be a murder case, like a family out there grieving somebody and they never found their body, and I could have helped. A big fucking toe, a human male big toe. You're probably wondering why I think it was a male toe, because I remember there was like like hairs on the
big toe. I really don't need you to describe it, or just a hairy woman with a big toe. I don't know anyway. So we're in our last day vacation. I just made myself so sick talking about that big toe incident that I haven't thought about in fifteen years. And we're going to fly home tonight, which is going to be a whole other experience flying with five kids. Oh my gosh, I'm just going to do road trips. I think after this, like you come back needing a
vacation from your vacation. I was just saying the other day, there should be a place where you can go and you check in. It's just one giant bed and they just massage you and they hydrate you and they feed you. You can stay there for like twenty four hours. That's what I wish. Bo. Yeah, didn't I just say that? Always said we I say everything is a week because we're a family unit. That's what I wish. Yeah, doesn't that sound nice? It does no like a padded room.
It's like an insane asylum. I just described an insane asylum. Do they call them that anymore? I don't think they massage you though. So I could be there, I could get hydrated, I could get fed, and I could get shock treatment. I'm my clear things up. I think that
sounds nice because I'm not the adventure like. I'm not the type that wants to go on a vacation and like go horseback riding and go like hiking, like I want to lay by the pool and I feel like you're either one of two people and I'm that person. But like laying by the pool with five kids, it's not all it's correct of degree. So yeah, I think just like a pat it room with hydration and food
and massage sounds good to me. The sad part is my I'm going to like long for these days one time, at some point, like once I'm an empty nester and the kids are gone and they don't want to go on family vacations. I'm going to miss the days of just hearing noise all the time, hearing those voices, hearing those doors slamming, seeing an empty fridge when I just stalked it a day before. Like, I'm going to miss those days. Yeah, but you can never leave home. Okay,
you can't leave home. You're my last one. You can't like when you get older, you can't move out. You have to stay with mom forever. Okay, William's not gonna move out with you. But do you think you're gonna live with me to your older I don't know, you don't know where are you gonna go? Are you still gonna take vacations with me? Let me rephrase that. If I pay for vacations, will you still come on them
with me? You don't know. Okay, wait, what do you do when you get older and like your kids have their own vacations and doing their own things and their schedules are all different. Do you take vacations by yourself or you just never go on a vacation again, what happens to you.
Go with friends? Or if you're like my family, my sister and I just have our mom take us on vacation.
That's what I want. I want my kids to always go with me. I don't I don't want to be alone. If you're paying mogo. Oh really yeah, that's how I do is perfect. Yeah, we can go find toes all over the world, take on the most prestigious hotels on one toe at a time, all across the world. So gross, I'm gonna call that hotel today. So they have a kids club at our hotel and they had a chef's night,
so Bo's like, I really want to do that. But then I feel like kids clubs are just parents' way of pawning off their kids, like they want alone time. Do you like how I say it? Because it's such a foreign concept. I've never done that. Like when I was young and we went on vacations, like my parents spent like every dinner with us. They didn't do dinners alone like Diane and I never did dinners alone, like
our kids always are with us at night. But you know, it's kind of just you know, high end, really expensive babysitting that you get at the hotel. So Bo says he wants to do Chef's Night at the kids club. So I'm like okay, and he like was held bent on doing it because he wants to take cooking classes in real life, which I can't find ones anywhere in our area. But so I signed him up for Chef's Night, mind you three hours at this kid's club from six pm to nine pm. It's one hundred and twenty five
dollars per child. Yeah, so I was like, oh my god, they better have like a chef there, like preparing like eight courses with them for that price. She's Louise, that's like, ohmacass. So I take Bo to the Chef's Night and it was like Bo and like I would say, eight other kids and being the guilty mom, I am all their parents are coming in and we get there on time, which is unheard of for me. Thank god. Bo's like
a time guy. He's like, we got to go. And I see parents come in and out and they're all dressed up fancy, and it's clear they're going to go out to a really nice dinner, the two of them alone, and they dropped their kids off. Being the mom I am. I of course, stayed with Bo for the entire three hours and for one hundred and twenty five dollars. Here's what they got. I guess we got a deal because they felt bad that it was like unheard of that a parents stayed. They did. They gave me I got
to make dinner as well, so that was nice. That was a treat. So they did a meet and greet and every kid had to go through the kids and like the camp counselor the kids club counselors, they were like, you know, say your name, where you're from, what your favorite food is, and what your favorite pizza topping is
because we were going to make pizzas. So they go through all the kids and bosokay, and he's like Bo and he's like looking at me, I'm like Los Angeles and he's like Los Angeles favorite food, sushi, favorite pizza topping, cheese. And they go through all the kids and then they awkwardly like turn to me like, oh and the one mom that stayed behind that's here, and I'm like, oh sorry, I was like toy Los Angeles, California, sushi, mushrooms. I don't even know why I said mushrooms, like I panicked.
There was like the kids were like between like six and ten, and they all looked at me, and I got that panic in school thing when they call on you to say where you're from, like new kids school, and I literally couldn't remember my favorite pizza topping because I was like so nervous in front of these kids, and I said mushrooms because the girl before me, the
six year old before me, said mushrooms. And you know how kids like in school, they're like what's your favorite sport or what do you want to be when you grow up? And the kids always just like all the boys say whatever the boys before said. So like you know, my kids would be like, you know, I want to be a basketball player, and I be like, you don't even like basketball. But it's because like the three guys before of them said it, so the six year old
says mushrooms. So they got to me and I'm like mushrooms, and I'm like, oh, I do like mushrooms. I do love mushrooms. No, they didn't make me say my age. I think I would have panicked more and just said six after the girl in front of me. So we then go inside and I think there was like paper and crayons and got to like do a drawing, which is great, And then we got our pizza. So they bring out these little I would say, like, you know, six inch like diameter pizzas, and they bring out toppings
and and you get to make your pizzas. So there was tomato sauce. Oh no, sorry, The pizzas come out six inch in diameters. The sauce is already on it, and you have your choice of putting shreddit, mozzarella, parmesan cheese, black olives, cut up green onions, cut up pineapple. I wasn't not at that. What else bo salami? I think there were pepperonis. It was kind of an odd choice for like children, I don't know anyway in the salami. Yeah,
the pepperonis were like all stuck together. I don't know, so I, like any adult, Wood just made a happy face. So I did like black olives to make a smile and like pepperoni for the eyes. Mine was cute though, right, bo I have a picture? Yeah, yeah, okay, oh I should have said truffles on pizza, that that would be my favorite, and they all would have thought I was even weirder. But so then they said, okay, everyone's made
their pizza. We're going to take it and we're going to bake it and we're going to drop it at the kitchen and then we're going to give you guys a tour. And this is already like a planned speech, so it wasn't relevant to me being there the only parent. We're going to take you on a tour behind the scenes of this hotel, the underworkings, like behind the behind the curtain. Would they say behind the scenes things your
parents never get to see. I'm like, I'm about to see it, and we're going to go on a tour. So I'm like, oh, okay, aka, we have to get these pizzas to the kitchen and bake them. We can't leave he little weasels alone, so you're gonna go with us, and we're just going to go like inside behind the door,
drop them with the kitchen and call it a tour. Great, So we all go and then they're like okay, and as we go and get to the kitchen, we're going to go through the lobby and they gave everyone I declined mine the pom poms, like cheerleading pom poms, and which all the kids just proceeded to like hit each other with and there was like shredded pom poms everywhere.
Before we even got out the door, we had to show off our pizzas, so she was wheeling all our pizzas behind and we had to stand in one straight line with her palm poms and prayed through the lobby, going pizza, pizza, and I was like okay, but it was like at this point, it was like seven pm and it was like a Thursday night, so the lobby is like filled with people all dressed up at the
lobby bar. They have like a couple restaurants that are in the lobby, and it's you know, eight six year olds and me screaming pizza through the lobby, which was really awkward. The funny part is people thought this was like amazing, this is the entertainment was so great that everyone got up from their tables and came with their camera phones and started like videotaping this like it was
some big deal. So any parents out there, check your phone because you're gonna see toy spelling in the background going pizza. Okay. So then we get to like behind the scenes and we open the door and we see the mechanics. So it really goes on at this hotel, which really gave me pause for why we shouldn't stay
at hotels. It was very weird back there. So as we're going like through this underground hallway like we went downstairs, were going like all these underground like tunnels there was there, and they're saying it because I guess they're used to talking to kids. And then the kids are even looking and like they're facing the wrong way and like they're picking their nose and like, oh my god, touching everything.
And I was like, touch everything. You can't touch that, and mostly for like other people's safety, because this kid had all even picking his nose. But they were like and then over here, this is where we keep like the coffee makers, and they had like twenty coffee makers, and this is where we keep this. And then she opens one door and she's like and this is a ballroom with mattresses. I'm not kidding you, guys. It was a ballroom with like hundreds of mattresses just piled on
top of each other. It was like dominoes. It was like a mattress tower. I snuck back afterwards and took a picture because I'm like, no one's gonna believe this. I'm pretty sure this is not sanitary. I'm pretty sure. I don't know why they were stacked like this, and it was really horrifying. It was creepy. It would have been fun to jump on, though there might be a
poostain on them. That could happen. Bo So my kid. Anyway, we go through all these like back ground stuff and then they take us into a room which was filled like imagine taking six to like nine year olds in a room and being like this is a good idea. And she was like leading it and not even looking back, and she was like, and here's where we keep our office supplies. But it wasn't, you guys. It was just big like paper cutters like and shredders, like twenty of them.
And I was like, oh my gosh, and these kids are like trying to touch everything. I'm like, this could in not so well. Anyway, we go through the kitchen, we go through the bar underground. I mean, I don't know. I went on this tour that literally was an hour. I was like, oh my gosh, weren't we supposed to make it, you know, eat our pizza and watch a movie. So we finally finally get back because we've dropped our pizza off. We've now done this hour tour. Maybe forty minutes,
I don't know, it seemed like an hour. We then pick up our pizza. We go back and we ate our pizza, right, Bo, Yeah, yours is kind of pineapple? Well why would you dump pineapple and peppers on one slice and be like this is the gross one? And then when it's when it's baked, you're like, well now I can't eat it. But you knew what you were getting into. You did eat two slices. Anyway, the best part of that night is they had an ice cream bar. Bo had three helpings. Right, He's like, is it okay
to go back up? I'm like, I just play one hundred twenty five dollars. You can go like ravage the entire bar, keep going like this is crazy for one hundred and twenty five dollars. You've got a six inch round pizza. Let's just gowing tomato sauce and like mozzarella. Oh, you got a glass of apple juice that was good until they ran out. You got an ice cream bar nice, and you got a tour some old mattresses. I will never look at it area in a hotel again after
walking through that. That's why the parents don't go back there. Yeah anyway, Sorry, that's my story. Don't do chefs night at a kid's club. Oh and then we watched Cloudy with a Chance and wat Balls right, yeah, half half of it well because they took so long on that damn tour.
Yeah, and pizzas.
So bad. Yeah, you got a pizza box that was that was your like party guests. Yeah, lesson learned. So I don't mean to sound ungrateful, because I am so grateful that we're able to take vacations and this is so so nice, but I need like a full twenty four hours when I get home, just to unwind from vacation and then head back to school. So yay back to school. I've never thought i'd say these words. I'm so excited for the kids to go back to school,