Is Being Single Good At Any Age??

Hey, I do Part two. I am not Amy Robach. I'm not TJ. Holmes, I'm not Jenny Garth. I'm not Jana cram Or. My name is Easton Allen. Thank you for joining me here on this wonderful bomby evening in Los Alivos, California. We're doing something really exciting here. I am here with two lovely single women, and we are going to discuss dating, etiquette, activities, customs, things going on

There is one big difference between your two guests tonight. I am definitely Chapter two and she is definitely Chapter one.

That's the beauty of this. We're also here with Evvy. Can I say your last name? Evvy? Do you want to just be Eavy? Do you want to be a different.

Name, Evvy like Chevy.

Right, I'm here with Evvie. Like Chevy. We will not be revealing her last name nor her home address. I apologize everybody.

Or social security numbers.

Yeah, we're here with Evvy. Evvy's from a younger generation and she's going to be sharing her experiences dating as well. Gen Z, gen Z, gen Z and Boomer head to head. This is very exciting. I'm really pumped to find out what's going on here. Now, let's let's start off things with a let's do a softball. Let's do a softball. When you're dating, when you're looking for a guy to take you out, how are we doing this? Are we on apps?

Are we on I'm screaming from rooftops.

Yeah, I can say that I've actually never been on dating apps. Wow, you have never I've never never made a profile.

I've never I've done it at all.

Yeah, but I.

Kind of good old fashioned meeting in a bar, really making eye contact, seeing what's casting out the line, seeing what sticks.

Okay, Well, how about this when you do meet someone, be it on an app, at a bar, on the street, on social media, how are you getting in contact with them? Are you exchanging numbers? Are you are you giving out snapchats? Or what's happening here?

Okay, So I have the solution for all single women out there when I've been on dating apps. I will text them on the dating app, but you know what, you can only do that for so long. I get right to the heart of the matter. I give them my phone number, but not just any phone number.

Oh yeah, this is good.

You told me this today.

It's right, I did. I give them my Google phone number. Because of Google phone number is not traceable, so they can't find out my address or anything about me. So that's the next step. After I'm on the dating app and we've texted, and I make sure that their pictures are current, then I give them my Google phone number.

All right, heavy, do you have a similar line of protection for yourself.

And give out your phone her Kathy taught me about this today, and I have just been raw dogging it and giving it out my number left and right. Didn't know that I was in danger, but yeah you do, ranger. I know, I get I should be more concerned about my safety, but I just give them my number. I've moved on, I think when I graduated from colleges, when we moved on from Snapchat, I really don't. I'm not interested in sending a phone out of myself.

You meet guys on Snapchat.

No, this is not anymore or I'm above it now. Now it's just phone numbers, yeah.

Okay, not social not Instagram or anything.

There's okay. I did meet a guy once and.

He did he he didn't ask for my phone number, and he was like, I'll see you next weekend.

I'm like, well, how are you going to see me next weekend?

And he's like, I'll you.

Know, follow you and shoot you hit you up in the d MS.

That's what he told me. He's the love of my life.

Yeah, that really so great sliding he did, and he did, and he he then asked and then I when he slid in the d MS, I just hit him with my phone number. I didn't respond to his message. I just hit him with my phone number. Yeah, and then he like he used it, but he never fall I think that it's been the issue in my generation is I get ask for my phone number all the time, and people do nothing with it.

I give it to them.

Really they do nothing, and then okay, you're busy.

I just yeah, I don't. Yeah, that's what I don't understand.

You know what, You just get to the heart of the matter. That's the problem. You young'uns. You you're like in bars and you're giving numbers and you're chat you're doing all these things. You just need to get to the heart of the matter.

Heavy, Well, what would you suggest that I do, Kathy?

If I give my number to somebody and then they don't do anything with all.

You have to make yourself so appealing that they like they have their your number engraved on their wrist and they're calling you the next day.

I think I'm bad.

So I had a boyfriend for three years, so I'm out of the game. I think I'm bad at the whole, like games cat and.

Sorry, I was married forty six years. Yeah, so you're gonna do something better?

Yeah, Yeah, I think I'm just bad.

Dating really for me has been like you have to learn it on the fly, and I've learned that men, Oh how much time do we have? Men put pictures up of themselves in bathrooms with their shirts off, when God knows they should leave their shirts on, you know. They they ask questions that they shouldn't ask.

Like what kind of questions?

Oh, really, give me a taste of it.

I want to know what are they saying.

I've had men ask me. No one's going to listen to this right.

No, this is this is just between us, Okay, just.

Between us girls. Okay. So I've had men ask me literally, I'd like to take you out. You seem very smart, you're beautiful, but I have to know that you're going to have sex with me pretty quickly into this, because that's and I'm.

Like Kathy's that they never change. Ever, men never change.

Oh I was telling you that on the way up. Are telling men just get gray hair. Their personalities don't really change.

They do change, they get worse.

Okay, So I have a Can I ask you a question because we have this conversation, please my question for our generations. I think that men men say that they want independent, smart, aggressive, funny, witty. I mean, that is my name all over it. But I think they're all liars. I think men say that's what they want, but they really want to be the knight enshining armor to come and rescue, and they want to earn more than you do. The patriarchy is alive, and well what do you think?

I completely agree.

So I'm screwed. I'm never going to find a guy because I can't be anybody other than I am.

I think that.

Nowadays, like women can I mean women can have children on their own.

Now women are trust me, women have always had children on their own.

Yeah.

But I'm just I think that like women can be like self sufficient, you know, you can take care of yourselves whatever.

And I think men need to feel useful or wanted in some way.

So I think I think in dating sometimes you have to give a little bit of that. I give a yeah, yeah, general, I love a man who opens the door.

Yeah. But I think dating is very different in our generations. And I'm just gonna jump in if you will let me please women in I'm not casting this versions. I'm not directing this at you heavy. I think women in your gen x gen z, whatever the hell you are, what are you gen z gen z? I don't even know what gen x is. It's something, it's it's a thing. I think young people today, hello, how are you? Let's have sex?

There's definitely more of a hookup culture.

A hook up on a first date, second date. I on the other hand, people in my generation like, we grew up, Oh you're having sex. You're a slut, you know. I'm sorry, that's how we grew up. So when I date a guy, if that's what he's after on the first I mean, first date. Are you serious? Like I'm gonna make sure he's going to pay the bill for my ice cream dessert.

I think I.

Think it's less about like what the guy wants, and it's more like what do I want out of this?

Like I respect, do you want to see the guy again?

Yes, But I don't think it's like an equal equation, like if I have sex with them on the first date, then they're automatically not going to respect me. I think it's a little more like something I can suss out, not saying that that's what I do, like, I'm.

Just saying like I think I can kind of.

Which is why Abby's not giving us our last name. I'm just saying, listen, sweetie, I could be your mother, almost your grandmother. And I am telling you men, everyone raise your hand if you disagree. Men take home to Mama the women that they respect, who they think they can build a life with, not a woman that sleeps to them on the first night, because tomorrow night she's sleeping with somebody else. That's just my take, So you know that's I live differently. I'm not saying I believe

I think it's more. I think the more of like the point is not.

Is taking it less out of like the men the man's hand, and like, oh, if he's gonna respect me if I wait for three dates or five dates or ten weeks or whatever it is, and more about like what do I want out of this situation?

And what do if I just like, if I just want sex.

I'm just saying, if I or any other girl just like and want sex and not something serious, then like the.

Just saying, or or.

If you want something casual, if you want something more serious than maybe you would yeah, maybe you would hold off.

I'm sorry, I've got one more question that I'm going to zip it.

No, No, well you're I think the point is that we don't zip it.

I'm so I am, like, I'm worried for this generation about sexually transmitted diseases? Am I the only one who's worried about this? Well?

No, it's always, definitely always should be predicted. I think if you want to if you want to be respected, I don't think you.

Want an STD that's for sure. It's like the number one thing.

It's interesting. I'm hearing conflicting things though, because I'm I'm reading in other places that like gen Z and younger are having less sex than ever. I know it's interested in sex.

Yeah, yeah, that's true.

She said, shrieking less sad.

Yes, it's it's in general like gen Z is like dating less, having sex, having doing, being monopoly, TikTok, doing anything but scroll.

They're just like no, they're just doom.

Scrolling, scrolling Jesus.

Frying their brains.

I'm so glad your parents paid for a college education. What's your kid doing? Doom scrolling?

I was driving up here with with Kathy. I was driving up What was our How long was our car?

Bay?

Three and a half hours? Kathy, Kathy knows if you want.

A lesson on banter tech banter, text, you gotta you gotta sit in a three and a half car ride with Kathy voice texting into her phone everything that she's saying. I mean, I learned so much from you today.

Seriously, I didn't tell you, but you must always be careful, Okay who you are texting? Don't text them, You're texting the right person, the right message.

Experience, Kathy, what happened? Does something tell us who did you text?

Clips? Or that would be a capital I know.

Okay, okay, how about this. If a male suitor is looking to take you out, do you think it's up to him to make the plans to pick where you're going on.

A first date?

First date?

Yeah? Yeah, I think I had a first date recently and he gave me so everyone thinks I'm a hard ass, but here's the truth. He gave me a choice of two restaurants, but I'd heard him before mention one of them, so I said the one I knew he wanted to go do Okay, interesting, and then I ordered the most expensive thing on the menu.

Good move. I like that.

I think when your first, yeah, you first meet someone, your first texting guy, like saying the least amount.

Is possible and seeing what they do with it. Yeah, so like letting them know.

Like I met somebody I live in LA and he lives in San Francisco, and I met him and then I like told him two weeks later, oh I'm back in San Francisco, and I just that's all I said.

And I just wanted to see what he would take with it.

And he was like, oh, great, can you do Wednesday Thursday? I'm around, Can I get can I pick you up? I have a reservation, whatever, Like, just let him make the plan and see what they do.

Yeah, I think, men, I think. I don't know. I can only speak for myself. I like it when a man says gives me either a couple of choices or says, let's do this. But I love spontanaty. I was out

Like that.

Yeah, yeah, good move.

And that's another question I have is does the man pick up the bill on the first date you?

Yeah?

No, I think I think the first few dates, I would say, first three dates, the man picks up the bill.

At least at.

Least the guys that I've dated will never let me pick up the check, and any guy that has is a guy that I'm never going to see again. I will say. I will tell you there's been a few dates that I've had where I knew I was never going to see the guy again. I looked in his eyes and all I saw was black, Like I'm out. You know what I'm saying, There was nothing there, and I insisted on paying half. And I don't think he

Well, yeah, I'm not saying that, they're Yeah.

I think it won't matter second date, third day, fourth day.

Like, no, I think at some point I don't want not At some point I wouldn't pick up a whole I don't know if i'd pick up the whole bill. But like if we're say, like we're having a longer date and it's like we are going out, I guess it's hard because I like my baseline is like I was in a relationship, so at that point, like having them pick up every single bill think yeah, but but I think, like I means by me, the house, the car,

I think that's I think that's a generation thing. I really do. I think it's a generation.

Yeah, I don't know.

Yeah, so, and this thing goes there's a tradition that goes back many generations. But the third date rule, you gotta If it's just not a kiss on the third date, then it's not going to happen.

Oh, there's got to be a kiss before the third date. I'm out, third date, third.

Date, that's the thing, right, kiss, Yeah, kiss, I kiss good night.

Wait a second, I think gen Z and Bloomers just agree. We give me five first date.

First date, first Oh god, if there's not a kiss for how am I going to vet you? Well?

If i'm if, I'm yeah, exactly. Wait, if you don't kiss the guy on the first day, If I don't kiss a man on a first date, he's never getting second date.

And here's what I'm going to add to that. If there's not like sparks or butterflies.

Is she's saying tongue, Is that where you're going?

Oh no, God, Karthie, I was saying, if there's not, if there's if there's a kiss and I don't feel like sparks, you're done, you're out.

You're not a good kisser.

So there has to be a kiss on the first date. And that's how you determine chemistry.

No, no, what are all these days?

It's so much time for Listen, I can't speak to my generation. But I'm about to please. When I look when I meet a guy and I look in his eyes, if I don't feel it like bring the check now, wow for me. But I've been around the block. I mean I'm older, I've you know, even though I was made a long time. So so for me, it's not like I don't have to wait for a kiss.

So you know almost right like right away, would you say, like when down the table?

Yep?

Before then yep?

Oh, I can tell right away.

I can tell right away from out and these people that say and at my age, I don't know about you heavy. But people will say, oh, give them a second date. Nope, Nope. I've learned if I'm not feeling it in the first date, it's a second date's not happening.

No, because I can tell right away, like if you're I don't know. I feel like we said this lot today. Kathy.

Game recognizes game, like if you're smart and you're attractive and you're in the mix, like, I'm like, okay.

I can tell.

But if you're that's I can immediately tell if you if you're I don't know, if you're not my vibe, not my style.

It's just there's I think these are too strong. These are too strong women.

Which apparently meant we're too strong.

Women, and so we're not gonna work. We think we're you're a catch, right.

Just say yeah, sure, I'm a catch.

Yes, And I'm not sure all women have that confidence. And I think the question of confidence comes in.

Okay, here's I think, Kathy, you're onto something we talked about this day.

On the car.

We talked a lot.

I mean we were on we were on a one way train to Yap City, so we were on Kathy.

We drove through some of the most beautiful northern weather. Hell, we are southern California, northern somewhere in California.

Beautiful, central California.

Central California. It's just mountains, beautiful lakes. It was beautiful. And what do we do?

We missed all of the way. We yapped the entire time we did. We did't see any What was that national forest we were in?

Kathy lost something lost Padres Padres Padres National Forest? We got, which means the father's case.

You're curious, yes, okay, well, okay, But what we were talking about is that I think a lot of times women in my generation are like and I will say, and I.

Have friends who are from college who have gone all different cities. We're in New York or London, who're Chicago, La, San Francisco, And I think every girl thinks that their city is the worst city to date. And I just think that we were talking about it. But I think dating ninety percent of it is energy, Like it's all the energy that you give out. It's not like the prettiest girl in the room, because if you're closed off, I mean, there's a baseline, but I.

Mean I'm going to take issue with that. I think if a blonde bomb walks in with artificial you know, doesn't ever real body parts. Men are going to take notice.

You think even if she's like looks like she's in terrible mood and she's like closed off and.

Yeah really yeah, you think a guy will still go up to her.

Yep, because I've seen it, Like some of my best friends from school were like the most gorgeous people, but I think they like were turned off and didn't have the right energy.

I know it. Energy is something. But we're back to this where we talked about initially men my age say, I think it takes for us we are confident women. I think it takes a strong, confident man who's not intimidated by us. And I don't care what generation you're talking about. I think that crosses age boundaries. Okay, yeah, I agree, Kathy.

I want I have some questions, sorry, what would be your number one tip for girls in my generation on like how.

On how to pick up a guy?

Like what would be a good question?

How well in the wild, not on an app in the wild. Oh, I've got the answer to this because I've seen you in action.

I can yess you have uh make it make that sound a little better than that.

Just I've seen you crushing it.

Thank you much better. Okay, I honestly I'm going to tell you, and I have children who are little bit older than you, this is what on my own patcast. Let me just tell you. If you're not listening to Golden Hour un Bachelor Happy Hour, you should be. But I say this on my podcast all the time. If you want to meet a guy, you need to put yourself out there and do things that you love. If

Okay, I really like that.

I also think that ties into what we were talking about with like good energy, Like you're putting good energy out positivity, Yes, out in the world.

You're doing what you love.

Yeah, no guy want Frankly, no guy wants to meet you know, Winne the Pooh, You know who am I thinking of? Heffalump? No, the one, the guy the negative here. Nobody wants a New York. Oh, nobody wants a New York. I mean I I will tell you for me. I have dated so many men who say to me one date. When I say dated, let's not get carried away. You are so funny, You're you're so entertaining, and I want to look at them. And I'm not mean, so I don't say it, but I want to say, how about you? Like,

I think that's yeah, that's important.

And I think I think so social media, and not that anyone's asking. I think that social media has presented a huge problem because people sit behind their computers and they think, oh, I want so easy to swipe? Yes, no, and it becomes all about physical features. Yep.

Can I tell you my number one trick?

What tell me? Okay?

So what I do.

Yeah.

So if I'm in a bar or somewhere restaurant and I see someone that I like, I just like just stare at them until they look back.

That's when they call the manager say she's looking weird.

It's Los Angeles and they think I'm one of like some question. I don't want something, okay, okay a restaurant or out or at a whatever, and you just I just stare until they look back, and they notice I'm staring and they look away and I go back, and like nine times out of ten it works.

They come up to me, Wow, eye contact.

Do you do you just blankly stare at them or do you like smile a little bit or do you just like I'm very curious what you.

Have to say.

I did this tonight at the restaurant we were at with the farmer. So we're here in Los of Levos to meet the three farmers who are on season four of Farmers Wants a Wife. Now they don't know it yet, but they're going to ditch who they've chosen and they're going to take me. But that's a whole that's a whole nother story. But we wants a Cathy Farmer needs a cafe. So we're sitting at this restaurant tonight, and you know, I start staring at this guy because I am sure he is one of the farmers. I am

Okay, but before that, Kathy, you asked me and you said that's what I was.

And I said, no, it's not.

I stared. The point was heavy. The point here is, let's get the point straight.

The po went.

I stared at him. First of all, I'm old enough to be his mother. But he looked at me like you're a creeper, and so I went over and talked to her, and needless say, it was not. It was not. However, he's from Austin, Texas, which is where I'm from. Interesting, what a coincidence. So I don't think it always pays. I think when you're young and beautiful like you are, you could pretty much stand there and look stupid and some great guys going on.

Now I'm saying there is there is truth to the ick too, sticky eyes. If you're if you if someone catches you looking at them and then you look away, you know, I'm barrassed, and then you look back.

I failed.

I failed it fail.

But I do think there's something like I don't know it's powerful about about eye contact.

If the eye contact doesn't work, do you have a backup Let's see handkerchief.

Would you buy a drink?

Yeah, when you buy a drink, I will not.

One time I bought a guy a drink and I had no idea what I was I I guess I I walked away and I was like, I can't believe I just bought that guy a drink like it was And then then you know what he did, yes for my number, and they never did anything with it.

So that's what happens.

If you I'm just going to say I'm going to go out on a limb here, you need to rethink.

Am I failing? Am I fail. I think Kathy's disappointed in my dating.

No. I think you are a beautiful, young, lovely woman. I really do. But I think that the generations are different. I mean, but in some ways they're different and in some ways are the same. Katy.

Can I tell you something that happened to me the other night? Do tell the other night again? I was at a bar.

Excuse me, excuse me, Eavy, do you work, because you spend a hell of a lot of time at bars.

That's I guess what my generation should be doing, trying to meet people out.

Here's here's a women's nowhere else to find Evy saying I'm working remotely, and there's loud noise in the background and clinking of glasses, and she's like, yeah, I'm washing dishes. No, No, you're at a bar. Carry on, carry on.

Okay, I deny all of those statements. I just I just I'm just having just living life. But anyways, I was at a bar the other night and this guy whatever, who I've talked to you be for whatever, came up and bought me a drink and we were talking kind of dancing, and then he ran over and went like right in front of me, went and like was talking to another girl and I heard him tell her, You're unlike anybody I've ever met before.

And then he came back to me and he told me before I left and got on my Uber because I was like out of here. He goes, you have a beautiful soul, and I hope you have a great night.

And I just I think when people say the dating's bad, it's it's the worst in La.

I'm telling you right now, beautiful soul.

I was like, you talked to me for fifteen minutes and you bought me a Heineken.

But well that okay, you know what set your standards hire. Okay, I have one more question here. Okay, I have one more question having sex.

Okay.

I don't drink out of paper cuts. I don't sit on the toilets in public bathrooms like I'm a hygiene freak. So you can imagine what I think about sexually transmitted diseases. I can't wait to get one. So I have to tell you, I'm going to admit to what I did. I'm going to because no one's listening to this podcast ever, using no names.

What did you do?

Okay? I this guy that I met wanted to sleep with me. And remember, I'm the girl that looks in your eyes and I can tell you. But stupidly, I gave this guy a second date, and there in lies the rub. On that second date, he told me how he can't believe I'm admitting to this. He wanted to sleep with me, wanted to have sex with me, and I'm thinking of my in my head, what I'm thinking is hell has frozen over when that happens. But what I say to him is the right to remove this

You would just take their word for it.

Hell no, hell no, I'm kidding. Here's what I thought. I thought. You know what, he's going to go away from this evening. He's going to get sober. I was sober. He's going to realize I'm not doing that. Like no, but no, this idiot goes and brings A week later, calls me and he comes up. I'll be damned. He brings me a labsheet and he says to me and he's clean right, And oh my god, he said. And he goes, you know, I paid seven hundred dollars for this test, and I'm telling Evy this story today and

Oh my gosh.

I feel like if you're having sex on the first date and it's on a calendar, J John Sammy Paul, Like, what do you do to protect yourself?

Well, I feel like these are I'm not just to set the record straight, there has been no Sammy John Paul.

Or none of those.

I like, I'm just speaking from my single friend.

I don't mean you. I do not mean to insult you. I just mean in general, So we don't. Yeah, it's like when the sex meant something. Now it's like, Hi, how are you? How tall are you? What do you weigh? What color is your hair? What you know? What's your astrological sign? And when we're going to bed?

Like I think I think maybe now more than ever, women are more like protected and worried about STDs because it's like so much more educated and you know people, so people are worried about oh one hundred per I feel like people are getting tested and nobody I mean, I don't know, like.

Unprotected systems in trouble. We cannot afford to perform.

I think I think women are very aware of that.

Okay, yeah because I but okay, that's good to know because so many women seem to have sex as as they get to know you instead of meaning something.

So we all learned something today that before you, before you go on a date, you need to get They need to get seven hundred dollars worth of blood.

Well they want if they want to second date with me? Yeah, probably is going to happen.

Let's close this out with a fun one. Okay, celebrity crush.

Oh gosh, okay.

Think I'm curious to see if they align or if they're wildly different.

I mean I used to love Alan. But I heard he's mean, so he's dead to me.

But to Kathy's he is not dead.

Wait, words matter, he is not dead. He's dead to me. If he's mean, I mean, I think Bradley.

I've heard great things about Alan.

Okay, then let's get him on this show. I want to him. Hey, wait, I will wait. If you get Alanalda, I will bypass the blood test for him.

Okay, we have that on tape.

Skip the first first day kiss, right.

Honey, he'll get that. Yeah, hello, are you? He'll get it.

Okay, we'll be writing. He'll be right.

He'll be right along with the gen z who's yours automatically, Ryan Gosling.

I love him on Hair Blue Eyes.

A Wait, does anyone know who Allanalda is?

Well?

I do. I'm sorry, you know I could be his younger wife. I wouldn't that be fun to date a guy who says I got me a hot young thing. There we go, of course he does say all do. It's time for a change, Kathy.

I just want to say I had so much fun with you today, our car ride.

Another one tomorrow.

I'm going right back down there later tomorrow.

I just got to get my textings. I gotta get you know, I got a lot of I got a lot of going on here.

Well, thank you both for being so open and honest and vulnerable with me tonight. This has been so much fun. Heavy and Kathy just the absolute greatest. Do you need some advice on how to navigate life? In chapter two? Call us or email us. All the infos in the show now it's follow us on socials. Make sure to rate and review the podcast I do Part two and I heard radio podcast where falling in love is the main objective.