You're listening to I Choose Me with Jenny Girl. Hi, friends, welcome back to I Choose Me. This podcast is all about the choices we make and how they truly shape our lives. Today, I am welcoming a trailblazer, someone who didn't just join the entertainment world, she changed it. We are talking about the iconic Daisy Fuantes. Daisy didn't just find a seat at the table, She built an entirely new wing. She became MTV's first Latina vij and the first Latina to ever Land a global Revlon contract That
is historic right there, you guys. Daisy has been her entire career choosing boldness and self belief, using her visibility not just for success, but for service as well. Now here's what I love. In her latest chapter, Miss Flint does is choosing health over hustle and presence over pressure. She's simplified her life. She's embraced a beautiful, leguan lifestyle with her husband, the renowned Richard Marx, and is finding pure joy in cooking, learning, and soaking up as many
sunsets as possible. It is my immense joy to welcome Daisy Flints. Daisy Daisy Daisy, what a long and glorious career you have forged for yourself.
Oh who knew? You must have? I really didn't. I really didn't know. I was not one of those people who kind of had the vision of what I wanted to do. I always envied those kids in school who knew from a very young age, Oh, I'm going to be a teacher, I'm going to be a doctor, I'm going to be a law And I never knew what I wanted to do. Yeah, I never knew what I was good at. And I really think that my career truly came to me from pure manifestation. Really, I really think.
So at what point were you like, this is what I want to do. I want to go and get it a start model because you started modeling.
Yeah, but that was also a fluke. I didn't go out and search for it. It came to you. It came to me. Was My next door neighbor was short in a model. One day, her little sister used to play with my little sister, and I guess she'd seen me around and she came knocking at the door and asked my mom if she would allow me to go with her. Because two of her models called in sick. She was doing a photo shoot. She knew I would fit into the clothes and that's how that and I thought, Mommy, please,
I've gotta go do this. This is what I've been manifying. I used to go through the magazines and imagine myself in the editorials, literally like without thinking, oh, I want to do this one day, I would just think, gosh, it must be so great, Like what a great life this girl has shows up for work and this is her situation. If I were there, I would certainly enjoy it, and I would oh and I could also I would literally put myself in the page, which is manifestation.
And I realized that's what I was doing. Absolutely. Wow, it worked even back then before it was cool.
Yeah, well, listen, that's the thing with manifestation is that I truly believe, like I know it's working. It works because everything is energy and vibration, So it's working whether you believe in it or not, whether you understand it or not. It's not about believing it, it's about understanding it.
You are speaking my language. What's the difference between believing and understanding?
Because I think when you say I believe in it, you're also saying it's possible to not believe in it, right, it can be. It doesn't matter whether you believe in it or not. It's there. It's happening, whether you understand it or not.
So true, right, yes, whether you noticed it or not, Like whether you're you pay attention, yes, because it's happening all the time.
The minute you start paying attention, you realize how you're manifesting things that you don't want, right even.
Yeah, right, I've been there. Yeah. I mean when you look back at all that you have accomplished, all of the pioneering, all of the firsts that you have had, that first contract, that global cosmetic contract, that first VJ job at MTV, what do you think?
I mean?
Was there a moment you realize I'm not just succeeding in this world. I'm actually creating a new landscape for other people.
I didn't realize that until I was told. You know, I was genuinely doing what I do. I was living my life in two cultures and two languages. And then when I started doing that on camera, it was apparently a thing that I wasn't aware of, and I was just like many of us live like this, in this country. Many of us are, you know, two cultures, two languages, many many many. It just hadn't been there was no one representing.
Us, I guess.
And so when it was pointed out to me by journalists whenever I was doing interviews, people would be kind of like, oh, you know, you're doing this crossover, and it was a word that I'd never heard before. So that's when I started hearing the word crossover, and I started hearing oh you did. You were the first Hispanic woman, the first Latina. And then it started kind of and I don't think even at that time I clocked the importance of it and what it really meant. I just
thought it was, oh, that's cool. You know, you're young, and you don't you're living in the moment. I wasn't trying to do anything extraordinary. I was just so happy to be given the work and to be thriving. I thought it would end. I thought every job I got would would be my last while, so I was just enjoying it as like this thing, that this opportunity that I would get that would end. So I didn't really have the time or I wasn't wise enough to really take it.
All in Yes, that's what happens as we get older.
Yeah, that's when you, you know, in hindsight, you start looking at the things that you've done. Yeah, I'm sure you can relate to this, especially you're living an era of yours that is so extraordinary, and you don't you're so in it that you don't really have the time to see what is going on, what you're creating, what you're doing, how people see you, until it's over, until you're a little bit older and you're able to look back and go, wow, I was I killed it. I was a badass.
Isn't that the best thing about getting older? Yeah? Yeah, like being able to objectively look back at your life, yes, and see all that you've accomplished and all the challenges that you've overcome.
Yeah. Yeah. And also yes, and also look back and go, I was so dumb. How could I have thought I wasn't cute? Or how could I have thought? How could I have been so insecure about this? That and the other thing. It's so true.
I look back at my younger self, I'm like, oh my god.
She's so hot, like so hot, she's killing I look at her. I'm like, yes, go on, yes, s killing the game and we didn't even know it.
I didn't know it. We didn't even listen. No, we took none of that in. We only took the negative and self criticism and the self.
Doubst yes, which I still you know, it still creeps in now and I have to catch myself and I remind myself, like, stop it, what are you doing? Stop? Like you look the best that you're going to look from here on, Like you're the youngest that you're we're going to be.
Right now, Today's the day live it up?
So true.
What advice would you give someone who feels like the thing that they want doesn't exist, for someone that looks like them or the thing, or they're waiting for permission to step forward into something.
Oh, the waiting for permission is a big one because again with age comes the power and the wisdom to realize that you're the one that gives yourself permission. You're the one, So you have to give yourself permission. You have to forgive yourself for mistakes. You have to just be okay with it. Like I have this really healthy voice in my head right now, where I think a lot of people.
Will have a voice that goes Oh you can't do that.
Oh oh that's twenty calories. Oh you probably shouldn't take that chance. My voice is like, you deserve it. Go for it, do it, have the pizza, have another pizza? What what? What's the worst I can to happen? Just go for it. You deserve it, like you deserve my voice. I've trained that annoying voice in my head the negative way to now say, you deserve it, whatever.
You want, You earned it.
How'd you do that?
How'd you train it?
Because I started catching the negativity in it, and I started going, who is that bitch talking? Who is that nasty bitch in my head? Who is that? So? I caught her and I was like you stop, like you were going to stop this right now. And every now and then it sneaks through. But I've kind of trained it to talk to me like I talked to my friends. I love hearing.
I love having this conversation with women from all walks of life and different levels of fame and entrepreneurship and business. You know, CEOs. We all have the same negative track playing in our heads in some way, shape or form of course, And it's about learning. It's a practice control it.
It's a practice, you know, like I used to wear somebody get ready to go out, get in front of the mirror and be like, oh I must have gained weight. I'm so fat, Like this doesn't look right on me, and I switched it to oh I just got to put something else on that feels more comfortable right now, Like I don't even like who cares? Yeah, like, Ohoka, it's not me, Like, yeah, maybe I'm a couple of pounds heavier now, but who gets not. That's not the thing.
The thing is like, just put something else on. Look at you closet. It's full of stuff that's going to look great and feel good.
Stop the queen of self positive talk.
It's a practice, Listen. It doesn't work all the time. But no, I'm just putting it out there because I know that we all have that we all have that person in our head, and we can train her to be nice. We can train her to be a little nicer.
Yeah, oh I love that. It gives me hope and possibilities for everyone listening, it's so good. I think it's safe to say, at least from an outside perspective, that it seems like beauty was your open door it was your way in in the very beginning, and I mean no shade on that, because you truly defined beauty for so many women out there and really paved the way. And cut to here we all are. Here, we are, all these years later, still in the spotlight, both here,
still killing it. But the spotlight has changed and aging what was once a very bad thing. I feel like the tides are turning, maybe you know, and now there's a new understanding and a new appreciation for women as they get older that maybe wasn't there before.
I don't know if that appreciation is there or we're feeling that appreciation for ourselves now because we're talking about it more. Yeah, I don't know that the world has caught up. I don't know that the world is giving us the respect that we need to demand. We're certainly looking better than we ever did before. As older women.
All older women are killing it. They're killing the game with like you see a fifty year old when a sixty year old and a seventy year old woman, they're looking better and younger, not in a way, not in cost way, not in like getting a surgery way, right in an energy way, like they just feel like you used to see a sixty year old woman and I would think, oh, she's a granny. Like now a sixty
year old woman is gorgeous and strong and energetic. And I think that that is because of the conversations that we're having.
Do you think it's.
Because of our perspective? Though?
Now that we're older, we have a deeper understanding of knowing or ability to see how rad I are.
That Yeah, that you can't really know it until you live it. And I think that we're just a group of women. Our generation is just a bit tougher, just a bit tougher, and we don't care as much as I think the previous generations did. We don't mind talking about the things, all the things and all the things that we can do to make it better. Like we refuse to give in, we refuse to not feel great, and we're talking about what helps us and how to
help each other. That is great. What hasn't changed is that women are still are still putting each other down. You see it on social media, you see it in the magazines, you see it in the press. The convert that the shame is hard to get rid of. So it's really up to us when we have these kinds of conversations to remind each other that that's not okay, that that still needs to be called out, Like, yeah,
there are a lot of positive things happening. We've changed so much of the game, but we still have to change more. I don't understand when who bash each other and there's a lot of that going on.
Yeah, yeah, it's hard and it's hard to even imagine. Yeah that you know that happening these days, especially as you get older and you know how hard you've worked and you know all the struggles that it's taken to get you to this moment, Like you wouldn't you wouldn't look at some other woman right and think, you know, ugly thoughts about her.
I think there's still so much insecurity out in the world with women that it comes out like comparison culture. It comes out in a very negative, bashing kind of way. And now at my age, I see the damage that it's doing to the younger generation. I see how as hard as it was for us when we were young,
it's so much younger for the younger women. So I don't know, I think that talking about it more will help some of these women catch their own security is coming out as benam you know, but that does need to calm down, That needs to be talked about. We need more conversations that where we empower each other because we really are much more like than we think. Our insecurities are the same. You know, it doesn't matter what
age we are, what generation. They may change the packaging on it, but it's all the same.
It can be a different situation or circumstances, but it's always the same.
It's so relatable.
Yeah, it is. You said once, it's not easy to navigate through this second act in life. You've got to have thick skin do You've got to be ready. You've got to be ready to shed your old skin and step into your new role. How have you done that?
It's not easy, you know, especially those of us who've grown up in front of a camera. It's tough to see yourself basically evolving into a different person. But I think that what helped me is realizing that I've done that all my life. I did that from when I was a kid to a teenager. When I was a teenager to a young woman, from when I was a young woman to when I was in my mid thirties, I was realizing in all of those eras that I let go of another girl, like the girl that I
used to be is no longer. I didn't look like that anymore. I didn't believe some of the things that she believed. I didn't act the way she acted anymore. This is just getting closer to the last few eras. I don't think this is the last era I think I have. I think I will continue to evolve. You got a few left in you, I think at least a couple, you know. But that's what helped me is realizing that, oh, I'm this woman now, and all along
the way they were all pretty cool. They all ended up being pretty cool, and I ended up liking all of them or being comfortable with all of them. So this is going to be the same. And when I get into my sixties and my seventies, that's going to be a different version of me. And that might be really fun too, I don't know. Yeah, the part that's not fun is realizing that you're getting older, you know. I don't like dealing with looking at myself and being like, oh,
do I need botox? What is the latest laser treatment that I need to have right now? What is the next magic potion that you know, I enjoy that and I don't because those things don't work as well as.
They use to as you get older.
Right, So that part of it is tough, But all the other things are there for us to embrace if we choose to.
I mean especially in the industry that we're in, but I mean honestly in any industry. As women, we are traditionally more valued if we are attractive and young. Let's just be honest. Have you learned to choose wholeness over that pressure to stay perfect? Like people remember you?
I think that knowledge, curiosity, kindness is much more important because I've met a lot of beautiful people who get ugly really fast. I've met a lot of people that aren't initially the most gorgeous person in the room, that immediately capture everyone's attention, and they are the unforgettable ones. So it's really an essence, it's a presence. And so that's why it's important for me to stay curious to learn. I'm obsessed with learning. I go down every rabbit hole,
and now with technology like, I am loving it. I am loving being able to learn so much about so many things on my own. I think that that's what ultimately makes someone attractive.
Yeah, the word curiosity keeps coming up in my world. And I've always said I'm so curious about everything, Like I've always been a curious little girl, and then I was curious all the way through. But now I've just returned to this, like I need to know how you've done it and what made you tick and where do you get this from? You know, I'm just so curious about human nature. Yeah, not to mention, you know, I will google how do you change your toilet lid?
Without?
You know, like I will google anything everything, and I want to learn how to do it and do it myself before I call someone. Total husband gets very irritated. He's like, just call the repair man. I'll pay for it.
Yes, but I need to know if he's doing it right.
Or when I have the repair man come over, I watch him like a hawk so that I learn what he's doing. It's not like rocket science.
Right, I can do that. Like I feel a little magiverish, like I feel like I need to be able to rig anything any time.
It's absolutely was there an inner shift moment for you at some point that helped you really move from that stigma and that pressure of being in the spotlight. I mean, you're still in the spotlight, but back in the day for both of us, we were in the spotlight.
Yeah.
Was there a point in your evolution. Maybe it was in your thirties, Maybe it was in your forties where you were like, hmm, I'm not going to be that anymore. What that was, Yes, I'm becoming someone else.
Yes, I think it was in my forties. I don't know that there was an exact moment, but I realized that I was focusing on different things. It wasn't like it hit me kind of like, oh, I'm not, you know, the most popular girl, because that was never the most interesting thing for me. I never all through my twenties and thirties, I wasn't interested in being the most famous girl. I was kind of wanted to be the most successful girl,
like the richest girl. I don't want to be the prettiest girl, and I wanted to be the richest girl. So I kind of focused on that a little bit more.
And the truth is, I had a lot of opportunities to do things that would have probably made me more famous and given me more notoriety, and I didn't do them, you know, like for example, I would get offers to do Playboy every year, and I remember framing the letters from Hugh Hefner and I thought, you know, there's nothing wrong with it, Like I would totally do it, but I can't do it while my dad's a lot Oh my same thoughts.
Really, I just I could never. I don't want my dad, my brothers, the gardening man.
I don't want to harass my dad. No. Yeah, and that would be a lot, It would be a lot.
You know, some people make it work.
No, and it's it's fine if you have that family dynamic. And I don't think my dad would have been angry at me. I think you would have understood. But I know, like I know, just because of our culture, I know it would have embarrass him. So that was never even an option.
Are you a daddy's girl?
A little bit? A little bit. I wasn't like super daddy's girl, but I was. I think my dad always wanted a boy. So I was more of like a tomboy with my dad, Like we did things that he would probably do if he had a son.
That sounds fun.
It was really fun.
Yeah, Okay, So I love that you didn't just get famous and get stuck in that you connected to advocacy for women. Yeah, it's very admirable, specifically in Latina representation, animal welfare, cancer research. I mean, there's there's many others, I'm sure, but I think that there's such a beautiful message there, because sometimes choosing yourself is about prioritizing what's most important to you in life. Yeah, so even when you're choosing to help others, you're actually choosing yourself.
So yeah, that's really nice way of putting that some.
Need that within you. You've also always chosen to give back. It's been a really important part of your life. What originally called you to this kind of service work.
Well, you know, when you become popular, when you become a public persona, you start getting a lot of people asking for your help. And that's when I really started thinking early on what a privilege it was to have that, to have a stage, to have a microphone, to have a voice, to speak up for organizations that you believe
in that could really use the attention. And yes, I have always contributed and donated what I could and still do to the organizations that I believe in privately, but I thought it's a privilege to have this voice to let people know. It helps the organizations so much, the ones that you believe in, for you to give them that voice, that attention that they so desperately need. So it was more about just giving back and contributing, because
sure I could do that privately, I do. And it's about having the opportunity to speak up for someone that's really special. So I think that that's a privilege that we all have, and that's a privilege that frankly, we all have now because of social media.
Every one of us.
Every one of us has the privilege of saying, oh, I found this organization, I went there, I spoke to this person, this is what I found out. I think ultimately, we all want to help and it's hard to figure out who you can trust. So when you hear somebody talking about something that they where they've put in the work, where they talked with someone, where they learned something, that's something that we can all share with each other.
Yeah, I think that that's that one of the best parts of social media, Yeah, one of the Yeah, one of the best parts. Let's just say that you stand up for our communities that aren't always reached, like the Latina community specifically facing breast cancer. I'm curious what do you think the most urgent conversations in the Latina community around breast cancer awareness, early detection, let's say, equitable care. What do you think those conversations need to be.
I think the conversation needs to be still early detection, being aware of it, and around shame. It's not your fault. I think that that's still happening. That's still important for you to feel like you didn't do anything wrong. You know, you didn't miss it, you didn't eat wrong, you didn't not exercise, you didn't there's still a little bit of a stigma. I think around shame with women and breast cancer, that maybe it was somehow their fall.
That's wild.
Yeah, I mean.
I think with anything with any illness or disease, our minds usually go straight.
To what did I do?
How did I mess this up? Yes, and look at all the people I'm going to upset or disappoint.
I think that's also a female trait.
What a fun trait to carry around?
Yeah, right, it really is.
Oh my gosh, you are in what looks like a very happy marriage. Your husband, the remarkable Richard Mars so happy to see you so happy in this chapter of your life. You've talked talked about simplifying your life. You've talked about embracing a median lifestyle and health so that you and he can enjoy as many sunsets as possible.
Yeah, now that we have more behind us than ahead of us.
Yeah, I mean you, how would.
You You're younger than your husband, right, yeahty nine, he's sixty two.
Because nothing I thought. I don't know why. I thought there was a very difference. I've always seen you as younger. I don't know why, but you'll always be. I'm one of those people that has likesaged me sometimes, I think, so this is like the free you know, very people are very comfortable around you. People comfortable.
I like that.
What helped you choose contentment and presence and health over perfectionism and the hustle and you know, I mean, especially with all those decades in such a high glamour industry.
I think part of it maybe is realizing what I just said, that I have more sunsets behind me than ahead of me, and really figuring out how I want to spend my time, which is the most precious thing that we have, which is the most valuable thing that we have, and we don't get enough of it, especially when you meet your person later in life. There's just not enough of it. So it's really important to me to figure out how I want to spend my time.
And I want to spend my time doing things that make me feel good, being with my family, being with my friends, creating a beautiful home, traveling with my husband who's still you know, a traveling, touring pop star, and I now get to travel with him. Like, how lucky am I?
That sounds amazing, not just.
That I get to travel with him, but I have the energy to travel with him, and I look forward to it and we have on the fact that I'm aware of that. I don't want to take that for granted.
Going back to like the pressures that we put on ourselves as women, as women in your position, in my position, how did you manage that? How did you Because there was a long time when I mismanaged it?
Yeah, me too.
What did that look like when you mismanaged it?
I think just feeling like I needed to do things the things, and saying a lot of yes to things instead of really thinking, like picking and choosing your yes. That's important, realizing what your priorities are, the fact that the things that you do or things that now you choose to do, they're not things that you have to do. You don't need the spotlight. You're doing things that make you feel good, that provide you and your family a little extra security. But we now have that choice. We
always have a choice. There's always a choice. So picking and choosing what aligns with you and with your values and where you are at that particular stage of your life is definitely always worth considering. Pausing, meditating on it, feel it out, and also giving yourself permission to change your mind on things like, oh, I thought this was going to work. I don't like it, I'm not doing it.
Did you ever have those moments where you say yes to things and then you know, a couple of weeks go by and then the thing is there, It's on the calendar tomorrow, it's happening. Why did I say.
Yes to this the time all the time?
How do you deal with that?
Do you just have to suck it up and just do it?
Yeah?
Sometimes you do, because and then I'm always happy that I did, Because I always kind of get into the mood of whether it's socializing or going out or getting dressed or whatever. It always ends up being fine. But sometimes I learned my lesson. I'm like, I remember the last time that I did that, it wasn't worth it. I am not doing it again.
Oh my gosh. If we had that hindsight then.
But we do. But we do do we know.
Even in the moment you're saying we have it, yeah, I think we now we have Now we have it.
Now we have We didn't always have it. Yeah, but we've lived so much that we've pretty much done everything. Like, right, what's anyone going to throw at you that you haven't already experienced in one form or another. I mean like.
Nothing, hopefully nothing everything. I think that there's probably a lot of things out there that I haven't done.
That's because you don't want to do them, since I'm.
Not putting myself in that position.
Yeah, yes, there are a lot of things I haven't done and I won't do because I don't want to do them. But we've experienced so much in our lives at this point, at this stage, we know we can trust our gut, we can see where something is heading. We know what's going to happen when you get to the thing with the people. You know it's going to be required of you, what's going to be asked of you.
We know it. We didn't know it then.
Yeah, we kept hoping for a different outcome. I guess right, you know.
And sometimes it's just survival. Yeah, I've committed to this, and that's okay.
But at least you're going in and knowing what you're getting into, like, oh, this is my favorite thing to do, but I'm going to feel good doing it and I want to do it.
And also you're probably going to learn something sure, sure from anything we have.
There's a couple that we go out with a lot, and every now and then, well we'll make a dinner plan. We some of us will show up at dinner and we'll all look at each other and be like, oh my god, I almost canceled tonight. And they'll be like, oh my god, we totally almost canceled tonight. I'm so glad we didn't. We can tell you that because we feel comfortable with you. But oh, I was hoping you would cancel. But then I was going to cancel, and
I was, And we do that all the time. But we really love hanging out with each other, and the truth is, we'd all be fine if any one of us cancels, but we're like, no, we really want to do this. We're not going to get lazy. So it's really about acknowledging when you're being lazy, because the truth is, we can just sit around and do nothing, but we don't want to. We have to push ourselves to do some of the things that we know we're going to feel good about doing all the.
Time, right, that are going to bring like new experiences or new insights or different perspectives. And you're like, I have a tendency to stay home a lot, yes, because this isn't a great love being home. It's the best I can just be content, right, and it's the best feeling. But sometimes I'm like, wait, do I have an issue here, Like, Emma, is this agoraphobia?
Is that what it's called? Yes, I think it's an I think it's a balance. Okay, don't you think it's a balance, Because yes, we could totally stay home and do nothing and that would be fine, and we can also push ourselves to do too much of the stuff that we don't really need to do, So It's about pushing ourselves enough to keep ourselves, you know, energetic, and feeling like we are part of the world, and also taking the time to do nothing when you need it.
I think it's an important balance and a difficult one. So true.
Yeah, I mean the nervous system and the voice on repeat is so so strong.
Yeah.
Do you have you know, the craving for those endorphins of being that girl, the it girl, the girl that's got the flash bulbs going and everybody's wanting her. Did you do you look back now and recognize that.
I look back now and thought I should have enjoyed that more, because there is a fun part to that. Yeah, I should have enjoyed that more.
Why weren't you enjoying it?
I was too self conscious. I was too critical of the photos after I would see them. I was trying to always wear the perfect thing or always I was just thinking too much about all the nonsense, instead of being like, oh, how lucky I am I that I get to wear like this great dress, look fabulous in it, and then people want to take my picture like that's so great, It's so fun. If only I could have thought of it that simply.
I don't think the word gratitude.
Was talked about. It wasn't a big thing. I mean, I remember being grateful, feeling lucky. I remember feeling lucky to be in the position.
That I was. Yeah, but I don't there's something different between feeling lucky and feeling grateful. I think you're right, Yeah, because grateful, it's just you are able to step back and really appreciate everything that you've gotten to do. And I think again, with age comes that ability.
Yeah. I think with age we're more aware of living in the moment, of being present and acknowledging what's happening in that moment. I wasn't able to do that as much when I was younger. It was it was so fast.
You've been a hustler. Yeah, you've been a badass hustler.
I've been going and going and going.
And do you feel like at this stage now, with your happy marriage and you're you know, began and healthy and all these wonderful attributes to this life that the stage that you're in.
I'm definitely anti hustle culture right now.
You are.
I am anti hustle everywhere. Oh yeah, it is. I feel it.
I feel it like I feel like I have to hustle in order to get to a certain point where I won't have to hustle anything.
So like, for example, the cold plunges. I tried it, and then I was like, why in the world would I put myself through this?
Or I can't even imagine. So I was like, no, no, I don't care how good that is for me or how good you say that is for me. No, I'm sure it is really good for you, but I cannot do it. I don't want to do it.
You know how people are saying, you know, you got to just got to get out of your comfort zone. You've got to push yourself to do the things that make you uncomfortable and take challenges. And I'm all, I'm all for a challenge, like I enjoy a good challenge every now and then. However, I am in the era where I am looking to step deeper into my comfort zone right now. So do not talk to me about getting out of my comfort zone because I've done that all my life and my.
Life that's right, It's time to stay comfortable, damn right. I love that. Do you Guys have a lot of music going on your house? You like brings you peace?
What is it?
What does music do for you?
It sets the mood, It sets the tone. It's when we have the lights on a timer, so at sunset exactly, our lights come on and they're dimmed exactly to a mood that we like all over the house. So it's like this dim light. The minute that that happens, the music comes on and rituals say can I make you more tini? Like yeah, wow, and we turn our house and our space into like let's welcome the night. And it just sets the tone. You can delete all the nonsense from the day, talk about it a little bit,
and then just enjoy the night. And the music helps us set that tone.
It really does. I forget about music and it's power.
Sometimes when I wake up in the morning, I put on like a yoga meditation music, which is a certain frequency that is for calming and for being alert and for relaxation. So it's almost like when you walk into a spa. Yes, this this almost subliminal.
Oh I just felt it. I just put myself in a spat thanks. Yeah, So I'm all about that. Like I want to have the music, I want to have the scent. I want to open all the doors.
I want to create an environment for myself all the time that makes me feel good, you know. And the truth is, we've worked.
So hard to have these nice homes that we have.
And you know, I can tell that you take pride in like creating an ambiance and a home that you feel comfortable in. So why not fully treat ourselves to that. I'm big on light the candle, do the oil, incense, the music, and get the nice robe. And I'm all for that.
Treat yourself home where the heart is deep. I always call myself a homemaker. I don't know why. It reminds me like Betty Crocker.
Yeah, but you make the home.
But I am a homemaker and I'm not ashamed to say it.
Oh yeah, but I think most of us are. Most women MA make the home.
We like to nest.
Yeah, we make we make it pretty, we make it comfortable for everybody, make it safe. Yep. And one thing I love about Richard is every now and then he'll say to me, He'll go, you know what. I know, I don't say it enough, but I really appreciate how beautiful you've made our home. I'm like, oh my god, somebody noticed. That's so nice I'm constantly like wanting to do it, mostly for myself, but I really appreciate it when other people notice it.
That's one hundred percent true. Okay, So what would you tell young Daisy M to not be so self conscious?
Yeah?
Mention that, But what else I would.
Tell her to be more present? I would say, look at your surroundings. Just stop, look at yourself, look at where you are, look at what you've done. Stop and think about how you feel. Think about what you want to do more than what everybody is telling you to do. You know, all through my twenties and thirties, I was hired talent. I was read the teleprompter and liked this video, do that interview, and dress this way where that don't.
That's too sexy, that's not sexy enough. And I went with that flow for so long that when I really stopped to think about it, I didn't know what I wanted. I didn't know how I wanted to dress. I didn't know what my deal breakers were. I didn't know what I stood for. I didn't know what I And that realization was the beginning of my really coming into my own and standing up for myself and thinking about you know, who am I? Because people tell you, like, just be yourself.
My best thing is to be authentic. Just be yourself. And you're going around thinking that you're being authentic and being yourself, but nobody tells you how to figure out who you are are? Like, who are you? So that you can be authentic? What are the things you need to ask yourself?
Right?
What are your deal breakers? What do you like? What do you stand for? What won't you stand for anymore? What are your boundaries? Like without becoming militant about it, but just a realization for yourself so that you can lean a little bit more into who you are. How can you do that if you don't know who you are?
It's so wild. I think I can only relate to the industry, growing up in the industry, and like you and I did, but I feel like we spend so much time, you know, being directed, told what to do.
Yes.
Then you're all of a sudden, you're out in the world, like you said, and you have no idea who you are or what you should be doing. And it takes a good amount of time to sit with yourself in that uncomfortable space of acknowledging the fact that you don't know who the hell you are. Yeah, you don't know what you want? Yeah, what age do you think that happened for you?
It started happening for me Probably might thirties, because before that I was just too busy to even stop to think about any of it. I was just going we all get caught up in that. I think. I see a lot of young women doing it now, and I guess that's that's the age where you just you go for it and you take advantage of opportunities that come your way. You're influenced by your peers, by people who you look up to, So that's the time to really take it all in and kind of try everything out.
But it was I wish I'd done it sooner. I see a lot of young women I have younger friends and love. I think that women in their twenties are much more mature these days than they were when I was in my twenties, I think rightfully, so. They have so much more information. They're able to connect with the entire world. I wasn't.
We're so isolated right in our own heads.
Yes, So it wasn't really until my thirties that I started thinking about, like I would say, things, and then I would catch myself going, why do I think that? Where did I hear that? Who said it? Oh? So and so said it, and it resonated, so it must be true. We did a lot of that. We did a lot of repeating of the things that we heard other people who we thought were smarter saying. And that's when I stopped and I was like, I need to do my own thinking. Like one of the big things
was religion. So I was like, I know how I was raised when I mean, I lived in New Jersey growing up. I was in high school, and I remember something that was great was being surrounded by people of different different backgrounds. You know, also my friend over here is Jewish, my friend is Muslim, this girl is Christian. I was raised Catholic. I'd go to their homes and there would be different customs and different things, and I didn't really understand it. And then I remember going, I
want to learn about all religions. I want to read up on religions because when I talk about it, I want to understand it. When I meet someone who comes from a different background, I want to have an idea of how they were brought up, what they believe, what they don't what they stand for, and that was fascinating for That was one of the first times that I thought, I need to keep learning about everything everything.
I think we think we know everything about everything at a certain age.
Oh gosh. No, the older that I get, the more I realize there's so much I don't know that I need to know, like immediately I know.
And then also the revelation that you have no control over anything. Yeah, is such a just like an opener.
Yeah, that helped a little bit, realizing that that you have no control. That then you can release a little bit of control. Yeah, because it doesn't matter.
And it's a lot to carry that control. It's very stressful, it is, it really is, and it catches up to you.
And it always trying to creep back in there, doesn't it.
Yeah. Yeah, we want control so badly. What do you think people can learn from your journey? Oh, so far, your journey so far, My journey so far. I think people I would want people to learn to keep open to opportunities that may come your way. I think it's great to have an idea of what you want your life to be, but also stay open to possibilities because sometimes the universe has a better plan for you than
you ever could dream up. Oh I love that. And and give yourself permission to change your mind on things.
You're allowed to change your mind. You're allowed to uh not want to do things that you once wanted to do. You're allowed to not enjoy some things that you once enjoyed. It's important, in fact, change my mind, change my mind on things. I welcome people to change my mind, like I thrive on that. I think it's it's important. One of the things from my journey is to go with it. Like, just just go with it. Make the best of the situations.
You know, whether the opportunity is great or not. If you're at a point in your life where just isn't what I wanted to do, well, maybe it's leading you to what you want to do. So always be really good at it. Whatever it is that you're doing, take pride in it. Do your best, do your best. Just take pride in learning and in doing the best that you can at whatever level you're at. I did learn that from my grandfather and then from my parents, and
that was a big thing. Just always always be prideful in whatever work you're.
Doing, and work hard. I feel like you've worked hard.
I think work ethic is a big thing in my culture.
Yeah, yeah, mine too.
Well.
I've loved our conversation so much. But before I let you go, I have to ask you, Daisy Fuentes, what was your last I Choose me moment?
I think we I think we talked about it. But my last I choose I choose me moment was realizing that I want to slow down, that I don't want to do what everybody else thinks I should be doing. That doesn't feel good to me, like choosing a slow morning.
You know, I keep hearing these women I wake up at five am, by six am, I've done this and I've done that, And I start and I start like hyperventilating, like my god, I got to wake up at five am tomorrow and I've got to do And then I remember thinking, going, no, no, I don't want to do that. That doesn't feel good to me. You know, it feels good to me waking up whenever I want. That's a luxury that I have earned at this stage of my life.
Right.
Not having to put the along my obviously unless I'm traveling or doing something I have to do, but not making an appointment for eight or nine am, because I like that time. I want to get up. I look at my birds. I have bird feeders. Oh my gosh, to ride a passage. Oh my god, birds we're up that age?
Where were birds all my life? I know, I'm obsessed with my birds.
I'm obsessed with my birds. And it's so meditative for me. It's like they don't need me to have them. Do you have that? Nobody got to get it with the camera.
Merlin you no, no, this the merlin.
Oh yeah, well you take a picture of the burden tells you exactly what it is, or you.
Just it listens to the bird and it tells you what it is.
Yes, it's oh, we're crazy. No, we're right, We're so not crazy, right, I think we're right. I love I love having my coffee looking at the window. I like doing my breathing. I like sitting by the fire when it's cold. I like sitting out in the sun when it's warm. I don't want to look at emails. I don't want to be rushed. I want to be present and have a slow mourning. And that is so.
Anti what everybody's talking about.
That is so anti what everybody thinks that we should do so. As much as everybody's going on and on about how like you need to live a week between five am and nine am, I am here to tell you that you can choose you and you can have a slow morning. I am the president of the Anti Hustle Culture Club.
I'm signing up and I am here for you. I need to be in your club. I'm so about the hustle right now, yes, and I just it's tiring, and you know, I mean, I feel like at my age it's time to hustle or it's time to you know, be where you are. And I feel like I'm not not ready to allow myself, yeah that much, but I do feel like I can see for you how you have lived this amazing life and you have earned right where you are right now.
So have you, So you know, hustle when you want to, and you don't when you don't. That's it. That's a rap. Thank you, Daisy, You're awesome.