Episode 473 - What’s in Your Cup? The Leadership Spill Test

around classrooms, boardrooms, coffee shops and social media. It's simple, it's powerful, and it will change how you think about leadership. A professor once asked his student a question. He said, if you're walking into school with a cup of coffee and someone bumps into you, what happens? And the student said, well, I'd spill my coffee. The professor nodded and asked, why did you spill the coffee. The student replied, because someone

bumped into me. The professor shook his head. No, you spilled coffee because coffee was what was in your cup. If your cup had been full of water, you would have spilled water. If it had been full of orange juice, you would have spilled orange juice. What's inside of you always spills out when life shakes you, and there it is the leadership lesson every one of us is carrying a cup. Most of the time we can control it,

but life has a way of bumping into us. An angry customer amidst deadline, a staffing shortage, a board member who blindsides you in a meeting, or even something as small as traffic on the way to work. The bump isn't the real issue. The real question is what's in your cup. Because when life shakes you, whatever you're carrying inside is going to spill out onto your people. If you're carrying anger, anger spills. If you're carrying stress, stress spills.

If you're carrying insecurity, then insecurity will spill. But if you're carrying patients calm, gratitude, or confidence, then that's what spills. Leaders often make the mistake of blaming the bump. I snapped at my team because they dropped the ball. I yelled in the meeting because they weren't prepared. But just like the coffee example of the truth is you didn't spill because of the bump. You spilled what was already

inside of you. Now here's the hard truth. You don't get to choose when you get bumped, but you do get to choose what fills your cup. This is why emotional control and self awareness are not optional skills in leadership, their survival skills. If you want to know the real health of your leadership, don't look at how you behave when everything is smooth. Look at what spills out whenever you get shaken. So how do you change what's inside of your cup? There's three quick moves that I want

you to remember. Number One, start every day by filling it intentionally. Don't just wake up and let the world decide your mood. Put gratitude, patience, in perspective in your cup before you even walk into the office. That means your morning routine matters more than you think. Number two, check your cup throughout the day. Ask yourself, am I running on empty? Am I filling up with stress or even negativity? If you don't check, you'll miss the slow

leaks that drain you. And number three, take responsibility for your spills when you mess up, and you will own it. Tell your team that was me spilling the wrong thing. I'll do better. This honesty doesn't weaken your leadership and actually strengthens it. Because here's the deal. Leadership isn't about avoiding bumps It's about making sure that when you do get bumped, what spills out helps your people instead of

hurting them. So I'll leave you with this challenge today, before the world bumps into you, ask yourself, what's in my cup? And if the answer isn't something you'd want to spill on the people you lead, then it's time to pour it out and refill. This story might seem simple, but it's one of the most viral leadership lessons I've ever come across. Share it with your team, share it with your family, Share it with anyone who needs to understand that what's inside them is what the world sees

when things get tough. This has been the seven Minute Leadership Podcast, and I thank you for listening. For more Paul Fell of Alito Podcasts, visit paulfellowalito dot com.