26. Albert and the Roadcrew + Max (No Motiv)

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I'll keep doing it as long as you guys continue enjoying it. Or until I get sick of it. Fuck it. But anyway, here is the Road Crew Podcast. This episode we're doing a We Are The Road Crew special episode. We are the road crew. We got Albert Moshard who has toured with, well he dropped out of high school to tour with In Control in the year 2002. Then he went on the road with No Motive. And then who did you do after No Motive? The Warriors. You did The Warriors after No Motive?

Yep. Yep. And then I did this band from Australia called Day of Contempt. Okay. Then after them, I did a band called Tiger Army. Yeah. That was your jump to professionalism? Yeah, that was my jump. And then I did Rx Bandits and a bunch of different things after that. Did The U's. I've done The Decembrists. Currently doing a band, Mogwai, from Scotland. whenever they come out to the U.S. and touring right now with John Bellion. And then who was the guitarist guy?

Wasn't there like a Latino guitarist dude? No? No, that was Thorns. You guys were talking about Thorns before. He's the one that did... I know, we got to get Thorns in here too. Rodrigo, Robin Gabriela or whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, we also got Luis, and he's the roadie for Take Offense. And also the painter here at Max Woodco. And have you only toured with Ticket Fans? You done roadie for anything else? I've done other local bands and stuff.

PSO was the first band I ever toured with. Shout out PSO. You want to tour with PSO? Yeah, that was the first where I went on was with them. Where did they tour? It was just a US tour. But you did a full US? I don't know. I don't know if it was full U.S. I have to

So to fill in the gaps, you had to use the fucking guide. Yeah. Like the big guide. The roadmap. Yeah. And you could get free maps at AAA and shit. But a fucking different time. Now, we were super blessed that we toured after MapQuest was out.

Yeah. But even MapQuest was in its infancy then because a lot of times it would take you to just like... city center if you're going to like a smaller town and then also like it wouldn't suggest shit like do you remember that one time we were we thought we were playing houston and like i think whoever was in charge of that day we like went to houston but we were supposed to be in la porte which is like a houston suburb So we ended up in the fucking ghetto, like, in this laundromat.

And we're like, I think that's where we're playing. And it was, like, feasible because it's like, well, we've played places like that before, you know? But we're like, no, this address isn't right. And then, like, we called someone. They're like, dude, you guys are, like, 30 minutes away from the show. Like, get on the freeway, you know? That might have been right before me. Nah, you wouldn't have been there because it was, like, that was 03. That was, like, our best tour.

That was the final Tony tour, I think. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, because we played with... Pride Kills. Yes. In La Porta Inn. Because they were all fired up. Like, oh, you guys covered Gigi Allen's. Go for it. Yeah. You know? So, Luis, I'm sure you want to go home. So you want to tell your road story? I'm going through my phone and seeing if I have any other ones.

And you're how old now? I'm 34. Okay. And at this point I was 14. Yeah. So like freshman. Yeah. So he was doing all that. And then I ended up, you know, he was playing whatever it takes. So I ended up meeting. Shout out whatever it takes. Yep. Mosh hard for Oxnard. Ended up meeting Milo and Javier and that whole crew. Yeah. It was like the crew, like a tiny generation younger than me. Actually, maybe not. Maybe a good four years. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So, yeah, you're in that crew with like the Javi, like the Warriors dudes. Javier and Ulysses actually had PE with me freshman, my freshman year. At Nard High? Yeah. So we kind of hung out there. Yeah. Whatever it takes was sick. Yeah. I remember they came out in that demo, fucking, what were the two hits? Mosh Hard for Oxnard and one other one. I can't fucking remember. I need it. Like this, the CDR demo is like the graveyard of hardcore. Yeah. You know, like who's going to remember that shit.

They covered it over puke. They did cover it over puke. Um, okay. So then like you started, you started a band within a dream. You and Adam Hanlon. Yeah. Of a eyes full of rage fame. Yep. Shout out Hanlon and Kevin Brooks, Kevin Brooks. And then, uh, you did within a dream, uh, And then that was around the time that you tried to do In Control, right? Yeah, yeah. You asked me to come on board and play bass for In Control because Robert had just left.

Yeah, Robert left, and then we did the Jason thing. And that's a funny story. Yeah. Right? I don't know if I've told it on the pod before. So we were going to play a night with the Dead Kennedys when it was Brandon Cruz singing in And we had this guy, Jason, playing bass for us. And we go to pick him up on the way to the show. And there's a note on the door that says, hey, guys, I don't want to be in the band anymore. And we're like, what the fuck? We're playing this show in two hours.

In Hollywood. In Hollywood. We're like, fuck, I don't know what to do. So we drive over to Robert's house and wake him up. It's like 6 PM. He's just like fucking dead. drinking fucking a 40 and like watching anime, right? Robert style. Just fucking Robert Martinez style and fucking, we're like, Robert, we need you, dude. We got to go to LA right now to play with like Dick Kennedy's, you know? And yeah, it was just like, he's like, I don't fucking remember songs, you know, this and that.

We're like, fuck it. Let's just play six songs. Let's go. We got to go. And he like saved our ass that night. But then, so after that show, And that show was wild. It was like 1,000 people, you know? Yeah. And people didn't even realize it wasn't Jell-O. It was just like raging. Oh, yeah. You know? It was fucking wild. But after that show, we needed a bass player because we had a five-week tour coming up. Five or six weeks. It was like the longest one we ever did.

And it was based around Posse Numbers Fest in 2002. And so... Yeah, you tried out and it didn't work out because you didn't know how to play bass. No, what it was was Ryan came up to me. I mean, I wasn't the greatest bass player I was still learning, but I had some of the songs down. You know, I had a few songs down. Ryan just comes up to me right before you walk in. He hears your car and he goes, whatever you do, don't fuck up. Nothing pisses off Zach more than someone fucking up.

And I'm just like...

weren't even upset oh you were just like oh all right cool well it was like you came in and like couldn't play yeah it's like i don't like i don't know what this move is like this is a tryout but you couldn't play like the e-string and it was like a trip to me because you were playing it like that within a dream band that was like trying to sound like poison the well and shit i'm like so if he was doing that how can he not do this ryan just scared the shit out of me that's basically what it was

because i was just like okay like and then i just i just got really shut down yeah and it was like all right fuck this i'm not yeah but then you asked me like hey do you want to come on tour anyways i was like all right cool well it was like people don't realize that was like a week or two before the tour went Yeah.

We just assumed that you were going to like, because maybe Jason quit like a month before and then we're like, fuck it, we got Albert and we've always just had bass players come in and be okay. Yeah. And then so like, it was like, oh my God, like we don't have a bass player and we're leaving in two weeks. Yeah. And like, I don't know, nowadays it seems like everyone is able to get a fill in. Like it's so easy, but back then it was like miserable. Well, because the internet. Maybe.

You know, it's like, here's your songs. That's true. And also you guys were recording. Yeah.

Oh, yeah, that sounds cool. Right, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So Dave saved our ass, and... Thank you, Dave Diehard. We love you still. Ryan paid you back in Missouri. So fucking Ryan puts his balls on his face like five days into tour. While he's asleep. It's hot as hell. Super muggy. It was like Kirksville, Missouri balls on your face, dude. That's a bummer. And I think that changed his attitude. Yeah, because Dave didn't want to be there. No, he was already over it.

Yeah, he's a homebody, and he's just there, and we're just laughing. Okay, so that brings us up to speed on Albert and starting his roadie journey, which he still continues today, which is awesome. Luis, you want to tell your story? Yeah. I remembered a few now. Okay, let's do one. Who's it with? This one was Take Offense. It was just the first one I thought of when I could

And then the homeowner just is like, is everything okay up there? I'm just like, I don't want you to come up. I'm just like, no, it's a guy thing. Greg, can you come here? And everyone's just staring at me, and I'm just like... Greg, I just need you. I don't know how else to explain it. And he finally comes up, and I'm just like, it won't flush. I don't know what

They just gave me a fucking glove. It's like, ugh, this fucking place. Nice. Damn. All right. You want to come with number two? Second one was, again, back in Europe.

In my mind, I'm thinking like during the show, there's going to be like some side attraction or some like professionals and they're some circus type shit. Cause you know, this is a really big venue. So I'm just like, oh, that's cool. Like we get to watch some like acrobatic fire things and shit. But yeah, the whole night they're just like, yeah, we're going to win a set. You guys are going to see him on fire and just like super, super amped

Three different guys running in a circle with a fucking trench coat, and I just turned my camera around, and I'm in shock. I'm just like, what the fuck is happening? And they're just circle pitting and fucking on fire. And I'm like... I'm hyped, and then I realize, like, wait, what the fuck? If they bump into me, I'll be on fire. So I'm just, like, backing up now, and I look at everyone playing, and everyone's just like, what the fuck? And yeah, they're just all hyped as fuck.

And yeah, they take off their trench coat, and they just stomp them out and continue pitting like nothing. And they're just like, yeah, we fucking love Take Offense. We only do these for fucking Take Offense. You guys are worth it. And I'm just like... What the fuck?

Yeah, it was just shit

All right, so the first time was probably, for me, going to any other state outside of California. That was the first time you traveled out of California? Yeah. So did we go... We went to Vegas. We started in Vegas. The Hammer House. Oh, I totally remember that show. Yeah, so I remember waking up, because we drove through the night waking up in Vegas, and it was like 95 degrees already. Yeah, and Nick came on the tour as well, right? No, it was just me on the first one.

Oh. We must have played the Hammer House twice. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, it was just me on the first one. Okay. And woke up as hot as all fuck. Yeah. At like 8 or 9 a.m. 7 a.m. in Vegas. Yeah, probably. Yeah. And I mean, it's like a junkyard. Yeah. So that's where we started, and then... From there, I think we did Salt Lake. Yeah, I don't think so. No, you're right. You're right. That was the one time that we went and played Salt Lake. Yeah. It was like south of it though, right?

Like Provo or some shit. Yeah, it was something. It was like that gym. Yeah. It was like a huge gym that was like emptied out because they had like lockers and showers and shit. Yeah. That was weird. It was definitely weird. And we must have driven through the night that night because we were there all fucking day.

Yeah. Okay. I think we were trying to swim, like, every day. Because, yeah, we went to that. It was a little town called Silt. Yeah, Silt, Colorado. Yeah. But it was like too cold, right? It was way too cold. In like, that would have been like July or something. No, it was May. But it was still. Was Posse numbers in May or June? It was probably in June. It might have been in the very beginning of June then, huh? Like, no, like, yeah, the middle of June because we left late May.

Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's wild. Yeah, because, well, we went there and we stopped at this little diner place.

And she's like, well, sit him over there. Like, no, so-and-so is coming. We already have his meal being cooked up. And I was like, guy's not even here yet. And they already know what he wants. We already got his ham on the grill. Yeah. Like, he's coming in, you know, at whatever time he normally comes in.

Yeah. that's fucking service dude yeah and I was like on one on one end of the spectrum is three dudes lighting themselves on fire and then having their crew name forgotten yeah and on the other end of the kindness scale is them cooking a meal for you before you even show up to the diner yeah dude I remember that being wild and none of us ate meat we were all vegetarian that's right except maybe Dave huh no Dave was vegetarian too yeah so that was another weird thing it's like oh first we got

this dark guy in there and then And then, like, now they don't want meat? Yeah. Are these guys... What do you mean, no meat? Yeah, what? Yeah, so that was an exciting one. That was an experience for me, because I was like, holy shit. Yeah, that's weird. I'm out of my element. Yeah, and that's Colorado. Like, Colorado's kind of cool. Yeah, no, definitely. But it was just definitely, like, a small-ass town. Yeah, it was closer to the Utah side.

I remember we were going around, you know, the Colorado River, I think. And you try to pole vault over... What? Yeah, because the water still had ice in it. Fuck. And you were trying to pull, you know, because we, who was it? Ryan jumped over. Oh, that was, like, all the way up in, like, that was after we met the Model Life's war guys and shit, though. No, that was on that trip. Really? Yeah, this was a different time, yeah, because you tried to pole vault over the water and just didn't make it.

You're like, all right, fuck it. And just walked through the rest of the time we were going through. Because we were trying to find a spot to go swimming, but the water was just so cold. Yeah, and I remember we found a spot that was like a hot springs, but they were charging like 20 bucks or something. We're like, ah, fuck that. So anyway, yeah. Let's just jump into you telling a funny story. You have some written down, yeah? I've got some stories.

We could start off with the one at the Triple Rock. Okay. Was it Holding On's last show? Yeah, Holding On's last show. And then Modern Life is War. Yeah, they played. Dude, do you remember how good that set was? Dude, the whole night was just. I know. And then Kill Your Idols. Yeah. Yeah. It was at the tour. We did, like, a little run with Kill Your Idols, like, working up to that show, right? Yes. Like, we played, like. Dude, there's some. From the East Coast. Right. Working our way back.

Because there's some side stories on that. Like, do you remember we played. It was a really cool club in, like, the Quad Cities. Yeah. And it was like a smaller show. There was probably like 60 people. It was holding on, Kelly Rydles in control. And then we go out to dinner at that diner afterwards. And it was just a total normal night. We eat this diner and we come outside. And you know like that apron that's around like some diners?

Kind of like that outdoor curtain thing that hangs around and goes up. How would you describe that? Am I describing that properly? Someone can describe it as a... curtain it's like that curtain that runs along the roof outside of the diner and someone's like whoa look at look at all those spiders it was like holy fuck do you remember that there was like there was like 40,000 spiders dude like that whole like space between like the curtain thing and the building

It was like a house in Indianapolis. Yeah. With Theater Idols. With Theater Idols and Holding On. And it was like the drummer of Still Crossed came up. Yeah. Because they were on the label at the same time. And we're playing in that tiny little room that probably held like 20 people. Yeah. And he was just ninja moshing the fuck out of everyone. It wasn't the drummer. It was the bass player. It was the bass player. No, but it wasn't. No, no, no. Because he was a skinny kid. Oh, yeah. If Rich...

He would have smashed

So we get to the Triple Rock, which is one or two of the guys from Dillinger 4, they used to have a bar and grill in Minneapolis. With amazing po'boys. Yeah, that veggie po'boy. Yeah. So we get there. The show's crazy. Everyone's... Just hanging out. Two of the guys from holding on at that point had sold out. And they were drinking, so they were going crazy. It was like their first night out. Yeah, and it's their last show, so they're getting it on. And they drew like 500 or 600 kids.

Yeah, there's a lot of people, so everyone's just drinking, going crazy. So it's the end of the night, and we're all still hanging out. You come up to me holding a chair, wrestling style, and you're like... Let me hit you with this chair. I was like, no. Because I was wasted. Yeah. Well, yeah. Yeah, because earlier in the night, I was doing shots with Gary and Patty from D4. Gary from Kira. I was with Patty from D4. And I was wasted. Not that it's an excuse.

No, no, no. But also, you and Ryan were the only drivers because I wasn't old enough to drive then. I didn't even have a driver's license. That's right. Dave didn't drive. And Tony... We didn't trust him. Yeah. Tony. So it was just you two. So you guys never really drank. Even for Ryan, that was incredible because that fool drank every day. I know. I think he was asleep in the van. He missed all this. No, he had gotten up.

Okay. He had gotten up, but he wasn't really drinking because you were drinking. Okay, so he had to drive. Yeah, he had to drive. So... So I come up to you and I'm like, yeah, Albert, I'm going to hit you with this fucking chair. And you guys are like sitting down. There's like 10 people sitting at like a long table. Yeah. And I was like, no. You're like, why not? And I was like, because that's not a good idea. And I have my hands up. Put your hands down, motherfucker.

And I was like, no. And by this time, Adam Lentz is playing bass for In Control. And he's sitting down. watching all this but he just has his hands down and you try to throw the chair at me it ends up hitting him and cutting his face open fuck and everyone kind of thinks you're an asshole why'd you do that to him Even though it was clearly supposed to be towards me. I was trying to hit you. Who was paying attention. I know. But you were the only guy. Yeah, I was like, we were arguing.

I was like, Albert, put your hands down. No. Come on, put your hands down. No. And no one else was paying attention. And so when I finally throw the chair, you ducked it. Yeah. And then it just hit the dude next to you. Yeah, it just cut Lance straight in the head. Poor guy. He got it good. Because he was like... bad. Like, might have needed stitches bad. You know what? Yeah, Ryan was in the van. Yeah, because he went and got him.

Yeah, he went to go sit in the van because he had a cut and Ryan's like, what happened to you? And that's when Ryan came out and was like, what happened? So I explained the story to him and he goes, oh, okay. I'm sorry. That was bad. It was a good time, though. Next time, put your hands up. I mean, there was like... A good two minutes of warning. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. It was totally stupid. It looks like everyone around should have known because it's not like you were being quiet about it.

No, but it does suck because it was like a really heavy chair. It was like a... Not a heavy chair, but like... It wasn't a folding chair. No. It was like one of those conference chairs with the real metal on it. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, so definitely... That was more reason to be like, keep your head on the swivel to pay attention. That's why I was surprised. Everyone was just kind of like, huh. Yeah. And I'm like sitting with my hands up like, uh-uh, don't throw it.

Well, you've been around me and Ryan enough to know. Oh, yeah. Like, it gets stupid. Yeah. I mean, and everyone was having a good time. Yeah. Like, they don't even use those chairs in WWE. They have, like, specialized, like, lighter made ones and shit. Zach wanted to be Hulk Hogan that night. Well, what night didn't I? Yeah. You know? Except the night that Hogan dropped all the N-bombs and fucking broke my childhood. Fucker. Say it ain't so, Hulk. I know. Say it ain't so. Fucking Hulk Stewart.

Yeah. Shit, sorry. Wasn't he like, there's like an interview where he's just like, yeah, my daughter's pretty fucking hot. I don't know. But he was mad that she was like dating a black dude. Oh, that's what it was. And it's like, that's like, that's like real racism from like the worst place. Yeah. And it's like, that fucking sucks. Yeah. That's so fucking lame. You know? Like, it's not... That's not even like casually being ignorant. That's like... I don't know.

He's probably mad because George Foreman took the grill from him. That's right. Yeah, but he got fucking... What did he get? The Hoeksteros? The spaghetti restaurant? Yeah. The Hoeksteros spaghetti palace? Yeah. No, Pasta Mania. Oh. I got Pasta Mania, bro. Anyway. All right. Hit me with another, Albert. That was pretty good. Well, there's that. I mean, there's... I mean, you got to think about, we did a lot of really cool shit, you know, for being in a super budget, like, DIY.

The van was on another level, you know. Yeah, well, we just had a family van that inevitably got, like, destroyed, right? Yeah, I mean, yeah, we... We had it. It served us well. Yes. It had character. Yeah, it had character. It definitely burned your leg if you were sitting in the passenger side. And your leg got wet if you were driving. Yeah. It was always something, you know? I forgot that it was hot on the passenger side. Yeah, it melted a bottle once that I put there.

And I was like, holy shit. Because you always hear the driver complaining that it was cold. Yeah. Because there was that hole there. Yeah, and then the other side is just like, dude, I'm on fire. What do you mean? It's freezing. No. Yeah, we tried to do fun stuff during the day because there was no guarantee that the show would be good. Yeah, so we made the best out of the situation we had. You know, we tried to stop to go swimming. We got season passes to Six Flags. You know, and What was it?

In Dallas, maybe? Mm-hmm. Those kids were following us for a few rides and asked us if we were no effects. They asked me, are you guys in no effects? Zach comes in, yep. Yeah, that's what I would have

Yeah. I mean, because at that point, the internet wasn't the same, so you couldn't just look it up. Yeah, you couldn't look it up. You didn't have a phone. You were just, like, guessing, like, I think I've seen them, and that's how they look like. Did we take a picture with them? Oh, for sure. Yeah. For sure.

So, like, they're going to, like, be bragging to all their friends, and then they're going to, like, two weeks later, the photos are going to get developed, and their friends are going to be like, you fucking posers. Yeah. I bet you their friends were still, like, staring at the fucking, like, album covers, and they were, like, comparing pictures.

pictures and shit or probably like they're just on tour this is how they look on tour yeah totally no it was them for sure yeah it was them for sure they just looked all fucked up yeah yeah the Six Flags thing was brilliant because like I don't know if it's still like that or not but basically if you had a season pass for one Six Flags it would work at all of them and so that really worked out for us on tour because Oxstar is only about 45 minutes away from Six Flags Magic Mountain in like

Valencia and But we had the pass, and it was like $60 or $80 for the year, and you were able to go to all of them, which was like rad. We went to like, I don't know, six or eight of them, right? Because like Ohio, fucking D.C., Boston. Yeah, Massachusetts. Massachusetts. And then there was like three in Texas alone. I

And we look up and we see like, Tony taking the walk of shame down the stairs and shit. And we're like, what's up, Tony? And he's like, they fucking told me I had to take my shirt off. It's like, dude, who gives a shit? You're in Texas with a bunch of dudes. Take your shirt off. Come on. No one's going to be checking you out. The ride was so fast. The slide was so fast that you just went down. Yes. It'll literally be off for 2.3 seconds. Yeah. But yeah, he decided I'm not fucking getting off.

Yeah. But that was a good thing about Tony. He had his principles like that. Yeah. Oh, yeah. You know, he was going to stick to it. Like, that doesn't make sense that you made me take my shirt off. Yeah. Fuck that. It doesn't. Girls can wear swimsuits and shit, right? Yeah. Yeah. You know? Tony was definitely set in his ways. He was a character. Yeah. I'm trying to think about, like, when we did the In Control DVD and there was, like, that one clip of him, like... Walking barefoot?

Yeah, walking barefoot. So that was in... New Hampshire. Yeah. I remember for sure. But I don't remember why he was mad and why he stormed off. It was a lot of incidents. It was so cold. He was probably mad at me for something. It was so cold. I had no idea. Yeah. And you guys wake me up, like, hurry, we've got to record. Where's Tony? And then we just filmed him walking. It was raining, too. It was cold rain. Yeah, it was right on the verge of rain and snow. Yeah. It was so cold.

Yeah, there was another good one where he had all his stuff. He was mad at something, and he was getting out of the van, and he had all his stuff piled up by the door. And he ends up... His foot gets caught as he's getting out and just slams into the fucking... Into the floor. Like straight out of the van. Oh, Jesus. And me and Nick just look at each other and it's like... Holy shit. It's like you can't laugh or he's going to snap. No, yeah. So we both just, like, cover each other.

Like, we just covered our heads. And we're just, like, children just, like, trying not to laugh. And he goes, God, I fucking hate this shit. And punches his back. Like, because he couldn't be mad at anybody because it was his

So we were in Dallas, and we go to a strip club. It was my first time going to strip club. It was bring your own beer. Yeah. So the guys who could drink. And at this point, I mean, we were all working to make money for tour. Yeah. And Tony had run out of money by this point because we were in the last stretch of the tour. Yeah. And Zach and Ryan bought beers for themselves. And Tony was mad because they weren't sharing. It's like, dude, buy your own fucking beer. And we were going home.

That was funny because you mentioned the 21 and the 18. So it's bring your own beer, but the way that they... make it be known if you're under 21 is you have to buy a shirt from, like, the strip club. And all they had was, like, this quadruple X, like, white shirt. So Albert's, like, looking like he was a fucking Casper the Friendly Ghost. Yeah, I had to wear the biggest shirt. It was massive.

Yeah, and then, like, he wouldn't, like, chip in on beer, but still, like, drink beer. And then it was, like, yeah, that night it was, like, coming up on the end of the tour, and we were just at this strip club that was bringing your own beer, and, like... Me and Ryan were like, well, what they try to do in those places is they try to sell you ice because they think you're going to bring a shit ton of beer. You want your beer to stay cold. And I think me and Ryan were like, oh, let's just go in.

We'll get some Keystone Talls and we'll just stay for an hour. We'll each have a few beers and leave. So there wasn't enough for Tony. Yeah. We just planned on coming, let's slam these beers, get some entertainment and go. Yeah, my first strip club. Yeah. So... We didn't share with him, and then he got super sour. Yeah. Yeah. And that was bad. That was the night. And that led to Tony leaving the band, actually.

And me and Ryan are arguing. We're yelling at each other. Like, you fucked up. No, you fucked up. No, you fucked up. Or whatever. And Tony hangs his head out of the window. He's like, hey, why don't you guys stop being a bunch of... He said the other F word. and get back in the van. You know, I was like, what? And like, I just snapped because like, I was just mad, you know? I was like, get out of here. Like, come at me, bro. You know, like stupid, you know?

And then like Tony was, I mean, I don't know. No one wants to be yelled at like that. So he was like, dude, I fucking quit the band. Like San Diego is my last show. And I was like, dude, if you're quitting the, like, I was like, are you serious? Are you going to quit the band? He's like, I fucking quit, dude. And I was like, If you're serious about quitting the band, you don't get to choose when your last show is, dude. Fucking last show's tonight. I was like, your last show's tonight.

Here's $100. Get out of the van. Get out of the fucking van. And I think he was just like, oh, give me a ride back to the crash pad and I'll get out. And then whatever. So we drove him back to the crash pad. Eventually we found it. And he got out. And he went into the trailer and got his fucking drums and just chucked them. Into the fucking street. And then we went and Nick, the other roadie who didn't go to the strip club, so we went in and got him. And we're like, hey, Nick, we got to go.

He's like, what are you talking about? It's like 11 p.m. or midnight. And he's just like, what are you talking about? We're like, tour's over. Tony's out of the band. And we fucking got back in the van and drove home and left Tony in Texas. And, uh, yeah, we, and it was weird too, because like we, at the time we were all fucking mad and we like drove off and then like, I think I slept because Ryan, Ryan usually did like the first night drive.

He'd take like the first five hours and then he'd wake me up at like five or six in the morning and then I drive. And, uh, yeah, we woke up like. a couple hours east of El Paso. I remember being awake as the sun's coming up and we're driving in El Paso and it's that beautiful orange, that desert shit. One of the greatest things about touring is seeing that, right? The sunsets and the sunrises in the desert. And I just remember thinking, whoa, Tony's like 10 hours back that way.

There's literally no going back. Like, there's no going back. And then I called up Matt, who plays drums for Retaliate now, and was like, can you learn all the songs in three days? Because we're planning on playing that San Diego show. Yeah. So we had to cancel two shows and then went back and practiced one day and then finished a tour in San Diego. Yeah. Yeah, it was a fun, great show. And we played that show before Tony made it back on the Greyhound. Yeah. That's what I was about to ask.

How he got back home. I think he just... I mean, I never talked to him about it, to be honest with you. I'm cool with him now. But obviously, that was a pretty fucked up thing to have happen. Yeah. And I still don't know who's in the right. I think it was just one of those things that it was like... well, you know, fuck you. Well, let's see who has bigger balls right now.

And then it just like, when it was all said and done, it's like, oh shit, well now I can't go back because I've already said these things. And then you're like, well, I can't go back because I already said these things. So it's just like that escalated super, I mean, escalated too fast and there was just no going back from it. You know, it wasn't really who's in the wrong, you know, it was just one of those things where, you know, where, I just felt bad for Al. Tony's dad is so cool.

He's going to have to deal with getting out of that situation. I actually ran into Al before I ran into Tony after that. I saw him at a Target or something and apologized to him. Like, hey, sorry I put you in that situation of having to figure out how to get your kid home from Dallas. On the Greyhound.

Yeah. that's a long drive yeah that's wild but man yeah i remember the promoter in arizona being so mad at me for canceling and i'm like dude i don't have a drummer and he's like well so you're playing that san diego show

But yeah, we needed the whole day to practice. And it's like, we knew San Diego was going to be good. Yeah. No, I know. You know, Phoenix, it was... It was never good for us. I mean, it was okay. No, it's a good scene, but it was never good for us. Because even if you remember when we played with Bane in Tucson, it was still not great for us. I mean, even with Northside Kings. Yeah, we played that Northside Kings show, and there was only like 60 people.

Yeah, so it was like, okay, well, is it going to be worth even driving to? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's a great spot for the way home. Yeah. But to go out there. But honestly, if we could have done it, I would have done it. It's just like, I think we only canceled because we played Dallas. So all we did was we canceled either El Paso or Las Cruces. And then we canceled Phoenix. And then that's it. We just missed two shows. And so, like, we literally only had 40 hours. We still had a 20-hour drive.

And then one day to practice and then go to San Diego. It's like, what the fuck do you expect from me? You know? It's crazy. But that's it. I mean, yeah, touring in those days were crazy, too. I mean, speaking of Modern Life is War, you know, like running into them on tour was a crazy thing. Because that was on the first run. And that was, like, we did their second show. That was their second show ever? Yeah. See, I didn't know that, but I do know that that was in their infancy.

Yeah, no, that was their second show ever. I think the only show they had played before was in a garage or something. Yeah. Because they put on that show, it was in a legit hall that they rented. Yeah. Yeah, in Marshalltown. Man, they were so cool. Yeah, because they had that house where they lived in, and they had that garage, and I think they played in that garage. But I think... That was a year apart. So I don't know if they lived in that house yet.

Because they're all from Marshalltown where we played that first year. Yeah. And then when they went to college, they moved to that other town, I think. So no, I think, what, did we play? Yeah, because it was in Cedar Rapids, I think. Yeah. Yeah, it was like, no, yeah, Cedar Falls is where they lived. Yeah. Because Cedar Rapids is like the bigger city. Yeah. And this is like, we went to Cedar Falls.

Yeah. But yeah, we did their second show, and that was crazy because they did a couple more shows with us. Yeah, they were good. Yeah, they were insane for their second show. They were all tight. I know. They're like one of those bands that are like, fuck, they had nothing to do except for jam, huh?

Yeah. Yeah. He definitely hated it. He was like, I'll give it a chance. I know. It's like you wish he could have gone on Colossus. Yeah. Here's just a perfect old wooden roller coaster. We just didn't know any of the roller coasters. We were just showing up. I think we had left my sister's house. Yeah, yeah. That's right. She's outside of Philly. So we would always just go there. Is she still there? Yeah. That's sick. Yeah. For this roadie one, who else should we call?

Let's see what the man, Thorns, is up to. I wonder how expensive one of those passes would be now, or if they even still do those. Yeah, they do. They have to, right? Yeah. Hey, what up? You're on the podcast. We're doing a road dog podcast.

I remember when Thorns came out here, he acted a lot tougher than he was. Not that he was trying to be a tough guy, but he was, I think, trying to be serious. Yeah. And Thorns is just, he's... Once he opens up to you, he's one of the funniest guys there is. Yeah. And it's like, that's when you can actually fall in love with Thorns. Once you get to know his real personality. And at that time, it was like, he was just a little guarded. Well, because he was the fucking, oh, I'm from New York.

Exactly. He's like always wearing a bandana. Yeah. And it's like, how we do it in New York. Yeah. Yeah. Thorns from the Hamptons. Anyway. All right. Let's pause these. All right. We got Thorns, the superstar roadie, other than Albert. The two best roadies in the fucking world. On the phone together.

Yeah, it's been all right day to day. I was like, oh, glad to hear that. Can I get that Cannibal Corpse shirt in a large, please? Yeah, you can. You know, I sold it to him. He shook my hand, said thank you, and walked away. So I was surprised. I was like, all right. He was a Nazi, but he wasn't being a piece of shit. And also in that capacity, just because he's a Nazi, I can't just start swinging on him. It's not a hardcore show. So he walks away.

But later on in the night, I ended up having to punch four different people for jumping on my merch stand or banging their whole bodies against the barrier that was keeping me away from the crowd. So at the end of the night, I was all wound up and pissed off. I was like, how... I punched four people and one of them wasn't the Nazi. Why was the Nazi like the nicest dude I dealt with tonight?

And you know, right there you already have like a little bit of brotherhood between you and you kind of get where each other are coming from

Finally, like, after five times of him coming up and talking shit to me and telling me how it's all fake, after telling him, like, dude, it's not fake, trust me, he comes over and starts going on again. So I was like, hey, man, lean in. I got to tell you something. And I smack him right across the face. I go, is that real? That's as real as Watane is. He runs off. I tell the other two merch people on the tour, like, You didn't see that. I don't want the band to find out.

A, I don't want to get fired. B, because I was working for Maniacs, I don't want them to cover me in my own blood that night.

I was like, I'm not trying to just randomly punch people every night. He's like, no, please. Every night, just pick someone out, just punch them in the face. And he grabs me, he's like, I knew you were one of us. I was like, cool, thanks, dude. Thankfully, I didn't have to punch anyone else on that tour. Yeah, just working for them was crazy. The whole trailer smelled of death because they kept rotting sheep heads in the trailer. I know. Real animal blood.

So I was like, ah, thank you guys for looking out for the vegetarian.

No, and I never fucked before, so I'm just like, all right, this is going to be wild. I end up scraping my knee, but still keep going. And then after all that's finished, I walk back to somebody's basement that we were playing at. Yeah. And I think you gave her a pin. You're like, are you coming to the show later? And she's like, no, I got to go home. So she ends up splitting and then just never talked to her again. But she had an in-control pin? Yeah. That's sick. Yeah. Win-win for her.

Yeah, got the roadie and got a pin.

I think it must have been one of those ones where we came through the Midwest on the way back and showed the video of Modern Life is War, guys. And they're used to frozen lakes and shit.

And they were just like... jaw open like oh my god you guys are not supposed to do that yeah like people die all the time yeah and ryan's just like oh check it out i'm gonna throw this big ass rock and it's like it's not breaking why not let me hit it harder yeah yeah well hey you gotta entertain yourself right yeah all right all right now we got max back second pod from no motive gentlemen Hi. Repeater 800. Skeptics. Standard Ground. Standard Ground. Demo Era. Hardcore Legend. Hardcore Legend.

Demo Era. I didn't throw that in there. That was Max on the demo with three X's. He didn't forget the third X, like the Hit the Deck song. I didn't give myself that name. You're not allowed to do that, right? Max... Anyway, so we're having Max in because Albert toured with In Control and then he toured with No Motive. And so, what was the first tour you did with No Motive? The first tour was on, what, Daylight Breaking. Yeah, I can't remember which band. Was it Vagrant Tour?

No, it was right after the Vagrant Tour. You never did any of those with us? No. Jeff, it might have been... Jeff was new.

Yeah. So, it was like his... second or third tour so were we in a van yeah do you remember yep we were in a van yeah so that's late that's late in the motive that's after the third LP yeah and Jeff's in the van so yeah because we had JP with us for like the majority of the touring years so Joe did like two tours and then you had JP and JP was on everything yeah he was there for like probably seven years holy fuck yeah Because Joe was just the first two tours, which all happened within six

months. And then JP got in when we started getting serious. And then Albert came in on the last record, which was probably like three or four tours, right? Yeah, I came in January 2004. See, how do you remember that? That's insane. I don't know. But I don't remember what bands were on that first tour. That was the Finger Eleven tour.

oh yeah i remember you asked me is that the bit in the sour max on music period yeah there's a lot of chin rock going on that was the opening band that brought like a 30 foot long trailer that had they had like a basketball hoop and like atcs and stuff yeah fuck can you imagine is that just all label buddy Like, oh, we got a bunch of money for tour. It was blown on fucking ETVs and a basket. It's either that or they're just regular dudes. They've just been saving up their entire life.

It was like their first tour. Yeah. You know, so like they must have just like bankrupted themselves. Well, they were on the same label as Finger Eleven. Oh, okay. That's why they were on the tour. I thought that was Finger Eleven. No, they were like a legit, like a real band. Finger Eleven is a real band? Yeah. And who's the other band? I can't remember. Stillwater? Clearwater? They were total dicks. We didn't get on with them at all. The ATV guys were dicks?

Yeah. You think if you have an ATV and a basketball hoop, you're going to be cool? No, no. They were just bigging themselves up super hard. They came in with a gnarly attitude the first day and super entitled. It was like... It was pretty funny, actually. Yeah, so what was, you hadn't toured with a band in between Inga Troll and No Motive? No. So the last Inga Troll tour would have been in September, October of 03. Yeah. Yeah, so what's like, what is the difference?

Well, Max comes up to me, we were at a show at the Livery in Ventura. Don't remember what show, and he goes, hey, what are you doing? I was like, nothing. He's like, you want to come on tour at No Motive?

You know what? He was actually working for Cy One Dummy touring, and maybe he just kind of became a full-time touring guy, and he just wasn't available anymore. That was a label that popped up hard and briefly, huh? Yeah, yeah. Who were they? They were all like clout guys. They did like a Killer Rattles record and a Seven Seconds record. Who were their main bands, though? They put out like a first Floggin' Molly record, I think. Jesus, that's a label. That's a good label.

Yeah, they've got like some... They're like one of those labels that's got a couple records that kind of just like bolsters their whole... They'll be making money off of a couple bands forever. It was like when Epitaph did Rancid or something. Are they still a thing then? I don't know. They had two owners on the label. One of them was this guy, Joe Sid, who sang in that band Wax back in the day. Then he was in the band 22 Jacks, which was him and a guitar player from Adolescence.

He played bass in Adolescence and guitar in that band. Um, there's like, you know, like an LA OC, um, eighties punk characters, you know? Yeah. Like nitro. Yeah. Yeah. Kind of a similar, similar vibe. Are they still around? No, I don't think so. I don't even know if side one dummies around either. I wonder what go, I want to have it with all those catalogs. Cause like who missing 23rd, Their second record was on Sessions or some shit, and that's gone too. Yeah, what happens after that?

I mean, it's got to be on Spotify or something, right? But can you still get access to that stuff? I don't know. I don't know if it's on Spotify, and that's kind of what fucks it up. You don't know if those labels are going to keep stuff out there. And then who has the rights and stuff? Especially CD era, because everything's in obscurity now. I know. Well, John was saying that they physically destroyed all the product. And he's like, fuck. He works at a record store.

Dude, I'll take the 500 missing to the third records. He's got a sick spread. His house, he has enough room for 500 records. Yeah, someone literally was just like, I can't sit on these records. And they just took them to the dump. I know. I mean, that's what happens. I don't know. I thought Mandel told me about that before. When you're sitting on too many of something, you need to physically destroy them instead of... I don't know, because it'll bring the price down or something, right?

It becomes more valuable because there's fewer of them. I don't think it's like that, but you can't go flood the market. You don't want your shit all in Dollar Bin City. Yeah. Like, you know, I don't know what you do. I stole my first Vandals tape out of a Dollar Bin. There you go. And a Subhumans tape, too. They were in the Dollar Bin at some point. Yeah, that record store in Santa Barbara on State Street. You remember that? Yeah, Just Play Music.

They had great, like... budget bin for tapes yeah that store was cool it was kind of like wild planet but leaning toward more on the music side right yeah it had like bongs and shit too right from what i recall but i just remember noticing like they had like all the tapes were in milk crates and the the cash wrap was like eight feet i mean it was like I think I was like 12 and it went up to my nose, you know? And they had all the tapes like in crates at the bottom of the cash rack.

And so me and my buddy would just sit there and like stuff our pockets full of tapes. And then the guy caught us and he was kind of like... Whatever. I know. Like, he chased, he, like, went to the trouble to chase us down and stop us, and then he's like, what'd you guys take? We were, like, showing him, and he was like, whatever, just fucking take them. Yeah, because what are they peeing on a dollar tape? Yeah, you're probably stoked, like, oh, cool, subhumans? Like, let's go. I know.

Good choice. Go for it. Good choice, kid. Someone's taking care of these, and I could get them out of my shop. Yeah, so on the first No Motive Tour, comparing it to E-Control, what was, like, the big difference? We were a lot more boring than they were, I'd imagine, right? It was definitely different. I mean, we had, it started off, I mean, weird, like, I waited for them for three days. We had no cell phones at that time. I didn't have a cell phone.

I waited for them for three days because I didn't know what day we were leaving. We were supposed to drive from California to Providence, Rhode Island. Okay. Yeah. And we had to do that trade. We're like, all right, we're leaving on Friday. So Friday comes. I'm sitting at my parents' house waiting by the phone. Nothing. I call them at the end of the night like, yo, we're leaving tomorrow morning. Be ready. Saturday comes up. Nothing. I call them at the end. I'm home the whole day.

Saturday I call them like, yo, what's up? Like you can't leave your house because you think they're going to come pick you up and you're going to miss the tour. Yeah. So – That comes with like, oh, we're still doing stuff. We're leaving tomorrow morning. So Sunday is like, all right. So I kind of go out and do stuff and then come back and then call them. And finally they come like, it's like maybe like 1130 and they come, we're picking you up. I was like, all right.

Oh, well, we have to drive to Orange County to Roger's brother's house first. So we drive there and then we take off. So that's the first experience. I was like, oh, all right then. You guys drive all the way to Providence. Yeah. Fuck. How many days did you allow yourself? I think we jammed out there, didn't we? Yeah. We just did like a three-day style. Yeah. Just straight through. We only did that twice. Because I remember we drove to Atlanta one time, too, to start a tour. Did you stop?

We didn't stop to sleep. You didn't stop to sleep? No. We just took shifts and fucking powered it. We had baller money, too. I remember one of the first things... Because on one, like maybe day two or something, maybe day one, day two, Jeff's like, yo, we need to stop at a hotel so we can get showers. And we just stopped and showered. Yeah. We literally just stopped at a hotel. Everyone took a shower. We got back into the van and kept driving. Like a Motel 6 or something, right?

Yeah. Yeah. That's cool. Who's an RX band that used to call Slow Motive? Yeah. So that story is a testament to that. Yeah. Did you tour with them? No. with us? No, no, no. I just missed that. We stayed at their house, though. We stayed at maybe Joe's house. Crazy. So you were really just around for the very end when you were doing weird stuff. Yeah. Like that, Andrew WK. Yeah, I did it. The headlining stuff. Yeah, and then we did Canada with Finger Eleven. That's a terrible band name.

It's just a different scene, you know? What does it mean, Finger Eleven? It's like your dick? No, it's... They told us... Like, what the fuck? They're a Canadian, like, rock band. It still doesn't explain what the band name means. They were called something else, which was a weirder name. It might have been it, though. I mean, it might have been, like, a name they had from when they were young, and it was this stupid name. It is stuck. But they took themselves really seriously, though.

So, like, either they were stuck with the name, or, like, it means something that's, like, beyond... Well, it's like you guys take yourself really seriously when you can't spell motive. Yeah, well, I was literally 14, so I get a pass on that one. I know, but they get it too after they name their band after their dick. Yeah. I remember they were like, you know, like their guitar player was like reading like Kafka books and stuff. Like they were like, you know. Intellectuals.

Yeah. They're intellectuals. Because they have a finger weapon. I mean, they were, like, crazy musicians, too. Yeah. Like, the bass player, I remember being a really good musician. Like... Yeah, they were shredders. Yeah. For sure. Yeah. They just played, like, alternative music. Yeah. So it was kind of out of our... We had, like, a little bit of a blind spot to that scene. Who's better, that guy or Steve Choi? Steve Choi? No, Steve's better. I mean, he's a legit, like...

Yeah, Steve's... crazy guitar player. Yeah. Shout out Steve Choi. Yeah. Shredder. Yep. So, but anything else you notice? Like it's just a nice thing to stop for showers? No, I mean... Because they're towards the end of the road, so they're all bitter and jaded like we were, right? Yeah. Yeah, it was just a different... I mean, it was a different dynamic. It wasn't anything weird. You know, we were doing per diems. You know, they had been an established band. Yeah. For... a long time.

And you were a fan. Yeah. So it's fun to get to see him, right? Yeah. It was good to see him. You know, it was, it was, I mean, it was definitely a different dynamic. You know, we were playing bigger venues. Yeah. Cause so with us, I should explain, I can't believe I never explained this. We brought out Nick who was on the phone just now. And then we brought out Albert and Nick was like kind of in charge of the merch.

Cause he was like really meticulous and responsible and, And Albert was just kind of a roadie. Like, I don't know what your responsibilities were other than moshing. Right? Because we told you. I remember we told you. We're like, you have to mosh for the first song and the last song of our set. And then a song of your choice in between. Yeah. Did you choose the same song every time? No. And then it was like, and if you don't do that, like, we're going to fucking leave you like Tony.

I helped load the trailer. I like how there was a precedent for it. Like, we'll leave you like we did the other guy. I helped load and unload the trailer. That's right. You did definitely. And I would say you and Ryan did the majority of that, right? Yeah. Because Ryan was also a roadie. Yes. Yeah. So. Did you... You did Roger already before. Yeah, yeah. Did he tell you about when we got robbed in New York? Yes. Did he tell that story? Yeah. Albert would have a funny take on that one.

Yeah, like how it seems to me is that you just wouldn't even have thought that it was you getting robbed, right? It's just someone coming in the van. Yeah, it was just so many people coming in the van. It's normal, like someone poking in for their hoodie or something. It totally escapes me, though, like the amount of shit they took.

it's like if you were sleeping they're coming back to the van again like those guys must have been total pros because it was it must have all happened within like five minutes or something and like maybe less than that because everything was grabbable yeah my recollection of it was that like it was like that sound that like when one of the bandmates comes in just to grab something like his toilet kit out of his bag real quick it felt like that like they were doing something dude they're like

they probably had like a bucket line You know what I mean? Like six crackheads going into the alley and they were just handing things off to the next guy. I mean, they were definitely pros because they knocked out the little thing for the key. Oh, yeah. They did the screwdriver move? Oh, it was locked. I guess. Oh, it was under the assumption that it was unlocked. No, they popped it out. I mean, we popped it back in. But it was definitely like they knew what they were doing.

Man, that seems like that could have woken you up, dude. Now you should have woken up for sure. It could have also sounded like someone's key going in. And to be fair to Max, we were up a lot. We had a lot of late nights. We were doing a lot of driving because we're following a bus. Yeah. You guys were in a van following a bus. Oh, it was Andrew WK? Yeah. Yeah, we had already been on tour for... I mean, we did the first...

That was like the middle of the second tour we were on, and it was already a couple months into touring, so we were all pretty tired. So him just sleeping, it wasn't... And it's New York, you know? One thing he didn't say, and we didn't go into, is who discovered that you guys had been robbed, and what was the reaction? Well, my recollection of that whole thing, too, is that when that was happening. I think the band, cause we, Murphy's law played that night.

And so the rest of the band went to Manitoba's with the Murphy's law guys. And they were there until like four in the morning or something. Yeah. And probably hammered when they got back to the van too. So like, it's all like pretty, pretty hazy, you know, like I remember like the, like the one thing I remember is that it was like a slow realization of like what had happened. It's like, you're looking for one thing and then you're like, fuck worth it. Yeah. Well, I think it was the manager.

He had his bag with his laptop and all his shit because he flew in for that show. He showed up just in time to get robbed. Yeah, so he's like, where's my backpack? Because it was time for him to go to his hotel. Where's my backpack? And then we're like, I don't know. It should be in there. Oh, well, where's this? Where's this? And it sucks because all of Matt's shit got stolen. Literally everything he owned was in his bag. So besides the clothes he had on... I had all my clean laundry taken.

Like there was maybe an Xbox taken games. And then Jeremy. If you're looking for Xbox games, Thorns will sell them back to you. Jeremy thought that he had all his stuff stolen too. So he's bummed. He's like, oh, all my stuff got stolen, you know.

a wedding picture of his wife at the time and like a leather jacket a lighter that his friend had given him like all this stuff that he thought was gone and throughout the tour he kept finding it so it was just yeah he got everything back yeah he literally got everything back like oh I found my picture it was just under the seat oh I found the lighter so you see you had to like be a part of all the sympathy in the beginning but then like inevitably got all his shit back so Max is just sitting

there pissed cause like yeah well like the shirt is too big for me cause I had to borrow it from someone or like yeah it's like free Where you'd be from one of the bands. And Jeremy's just like stoked because he's finding stuff in the van. Oh, dude, my jacket. It was here the whole time. Like, oh, nothing ended up getting taken from me. What is it? Was it his giant size lighter? No, it was a slot. You remember that? That thing actually worked, that giant Zippo.

He had a Zippo that was like six inches tall. It was just one of those random things you would find somewhere. Yeah. That would be so funny if he thought that was gone and then, oh, hey, here it is under the seat. I got it. It's like, that'd be the ultimate rub in. I know. Oh, somehow his Zippo's safe and I lost all my shirts. But that's like, that's wild that he took like clothes. They just grabbed everything. It was just bags. Everyone's got like some story of getting robbed.

And, like, that's, like, a pretty mild... The only thing that makes that story interesting is the fact that we were actually asleep in the van when they, like, stole everything. But we got off pretty easy. Besides, I'm sure the manager's laptop was covered in stuff anyway. But, like, what strung out got robbed a few years ago. And they literally, like... The story I heard about this is, like, the band pulled up to their hotel and every single person got out of the van and walked in.

And someone just got in and drove off. So they literally just took everything. Their trailer with all their gear in it and, like... So we got off pretty easy, if you think about it. Yeah, I've heard a bunch of stuff of people's trailers getting stolen and shit. But I just don't have that much sympathy for that. Okay, you're getting lazy and trusting that you can just leave your trailer at a gas station and going off. We had someone sleep in the van every single night.

Like, there was no taking it off. And sometimes that sucked because it's like... It's hot. Yeah, it's hot as fuck. You know, you can't have the AC on all night.

and it's like you might be staying at like a sick crash pad and everyone else is gonna fucking you know watch like fucking Total Recall and something and you gotta fucking you're on van duty that night and have to like sweat it out in the van by yourself it was usually me and Ryan yeah well it was usually me and Ryan because a lot of people had pets yeah so Ryan by default because he was allergic to animals so it was like oh I'm going there that was always my favorite is like if we showed up

somewhere and it's like fuck yeah they got a cat I'm not in the van you know I remember remember where the fuck were we we stayed after that uh that suicide file show in like where it just seemed like it was like kind of a sketchy neighborhood in boston and so we had like we if basically we'd always have one person sleeping in the van and then if the area seems sketchy we'd have two people sleeping in yeah you know it's like well i need another body to fight off whatever's coming We used to

always, no matter what, we'd back the trailer up against a wall. Yeah. And that way it's like you couldn't even unhook it and move. Because I think that's a move that people do is they just unhook the trailer and drive off with it. Absolutely. And so it's like as long as you have that wall behind the trailer for any touring bands who are listening to this, that's like the move. Yeah. Well, I think a lot of people just disconnect the trailer because they're lazy.

Like, if you want to find parking and shit. Oh, and they'll just, like, put it off in the corner of a parking lot with a free sign on it? Exactly. I think what they do is they just double park, you know, in a parking spot. Oh, yeah, yeah. And it's just like at a hotel. Someone could easily just be like, all right. Yeah, go and pop it off. Yep, here you go. Yeah. You know, they can break off a lock easily.

Yeah. Yeah. I mean, there's only, like, a few rules in touring to, like, keep yourself from getting in trouble.

And, like, that's, like, one of them is just, like, don't leave stuff in the van and yeah you know yeah that's like now that like i whenever i see a touring band on the road you know right away and so it's like everyone every band on tour is wearing a giant sign on their back that's saying like here's like a bunch of free shit right here like they got stickers all over the windows and they're pulling trailer and there's like some guy with like you know green hair like driving and it's like yeah

we're gonna we're gonna score if we rob that thing yeah undoubtedly I know, it's surprising that it hasn't happened to more people, right? Like, just get robbed. Like, you think that, like, that's actually a pretty good little, like, criminal racket is, like, look through the fucking papers and when the shows are coming and just, like, follow these people. Yeah, but at the same time, there's going to be people that don't have shit.

You know, you're going to go through all this work, potentially get caught.

that's true that's true like let's just say I'm a dude and I'm fucking I'm trying to follow the headlining band home but like how do you know when four vans leave like you might be following oh it's the opener god damn it it's the opener like they just drive to the house it's like two miles away you're all fuck but the crazy thing is it's like there's the off chance that you get shattered realm and you're trying to break into their fucking van. You know, those dudes don't give a fuck.

Is that like tough guys or something? Yeah. They're, they're crazy. Like New York, New Jersey, like they're Philly, right? Yeah. Some Philly, New Jersey, New Jersey. But like, they're all crazy dudes. They don't give a fuck, dude. Like, yeah, that'd be hilarious. Yeah. Like they don't, they'll stab you. Yeah. You know, so it's just like, allegedly. No, they're, they're pretty crazy. Yeah. Allegedly.

I feel like In Control did fun stuff, like, on tour. Like, you guys would go, like, jump off of bridges and, like... No, yeah, we definitely did a lot of, like... I mean, we had a time to kill, you know? We weren't on a set schedule. We were the headliners, so we were doing stuff in between. We were going to roller coasters. You know, with us, it was like... You had to be there at like 3 p.m. or something, right? For a sound check?

Yeah, we had to be there to load in and get ready and do all this stuff. So it was the professionalism. I think that's how Roger sums it up. It's fucked up doing these episodes because they're kind of on a delay. The Roger episode comes out in two days. But it was funny because he talks about starting touring with you guys. He's like, when I started touring, that's when I realized...

There was a time that we were supposed to show up and usually you'd show up and there was always someone really angry with you for being late. Show up and get yelled at. I think he was talking about Warped Tour. Show up, get yelled at by the guy that says you're supposed to be here. You're supposed to be here at this time and over there. Or any of the package tours too. There was always some kind of driver.

The tour manager was always kind of just hard on you it's like working construction or something it's like you're gonna get hazed no matter what you do yeah like if they tell you to go faster then if you go faster it's like we'll do it better you know but then if you show up too early you have to like sit there and wait you know it's like oh you're too early go do something yeah you know so it's just kind of like okay well now we have to figure out what to do for two hours yeah there's a lot of

hurry up and wait for sure yeah go play spades dude Yeah. That's like the majority of... I think what we did on tour was sit in Taco Bell or Starbucks and play Spades. Like, free air conditioning and refills and entertainment. Well, we had Xbox Ones on one of the vans. Two TVs. My brain was melted after that tour. Yeah, and Roger wasn't... I couldn't even close my mouth all the way. Yeah, Roger wasn't a video game guy, so he would do the driving.

We were just playing Halo for like nine hours at a time. Yo, Roger, you want to drive? Sure.

Well, if you're on your third tour off... the third record, you kind of know where you're landing. Yeah. Yeah. So it's like, then you said you're able to have some fun. Like you'd blow through the band money and shit. Yeah. We kind of like to stop giving a fuck at that point. Yeah. We'd go eat waffle house, really treat ourselves. Yeah. All right. This is on, this is on the band. Cool. So we'd spend, you can even get smothered. Yeah. And cover and dice. Yeah, we sure can get them.

Yeah, we spent probably like 50, 60 bucks at Waffle House between five guys, which is like a total smorgasbord there. So we were just going crazy. Waffle House in the South is the best. They have them in Phoenix and shit. Yeah. But it's like a normal restaurant. No, in the South, you'll actually run into a couple line dancing to the jukebox in there. Yeah, and I feel like everything is a la carte and 99 cents. Although that's a perspective that's 20 years old. Well, I mean, it used to be.

That's the thing. It used to be really cheap. You can get a triple hash brown for... Two bucks. Yeah. I also kind of like that, that mid, like the, how all the diners out there still smell like cigarettes. And so like you kind of walk in and it's that smell of like coffee and cigarettes and like breakfast. I don't know. Like that's like a, that's like a thing you don't like experience anymore. But like at 10 o'clock at night. Yeah. All hours. Yeah. All right.

What other stories do we got for no motive? That might be it. Like actually I, Man, I thought our bands were fun and they were kind of boring after all. A little bit. This was like just all a waste of time, dude. I should have gotten my master's.

time schedule if you can if you have the ability you don't have to get to the show until like 6 or even if you are on a time schedule you gotta get there at 3 like leave early like Whatever. Because you're driving through, like, America is fucking sick, dude. It's got, like, every different type of fucking, you know, topography. Right? You can be in the mountains. You can be in the desert. You can be, like, all over the fucking place.

And it's, like, it's a goddamn shame if you travel the country and don't, like, do something cool. Just play Halo the whole time. That's kind of psycho. Right? Although, like, in your defense, like, Halo is, like, brand new and, like, super sick. Like, I mean, I remember, like, Tony Hawk pro skater coming out and be like, this is all I want to do. Yeah. Like for months. Right. So it's like, I mean, imagine that first month, like that's you playing halo.

Yeah. You know, or fucking, Oh, family guy just came out on DVD. Well, I know what I'm doing the next three days, you know, like 10 years of touring and seeing the landscape. Yeah. Yeah. It's like, but I just think that, I don't know. If you're young and you're driving in an area and there's a little bit of snow over there, fucking go sled it. Fucking tackle a snowman. It's free. Yeah, go fucking make a snowman and kick his fucking head off. I don't know. Some of this stuff was dumb.

We shouldn't have walked on the lakes and stuff. No. But that was fun as fuck. I just mean when people tell tour stories, it's usually about a fight they got into. Yeah, which is lame. Or... shenanigans or whatever. Yeah. You know, and it's like, I remember one time we like thrashed a dressing room and I felt like such a dumb ass after we did it. I was like, well, like I tried to do the, the, the John Bonham thing and I just feel like an asshole.

Yeah. But instead I feel like I tried to be John Bonham, but I ended up feeling like a guy from LA guns. Exactly. It's probably a food, you know? Yeah. So, I mean, you get a little bit of that out of your system and you start realizing what, What kind of opportunities there are. Yeah, I had an unfair assessment, though, of no motive because I caught him at the later days, you know, where I was just kind of like, okay, whatever. We're just going to do whatever it takes to get us there.

Yeah, but you wouldn't say we were jaded, right? Did we act like jaded? No, no. No, but it was just kind of like, whatever. Like, you know, let's just not argue. Let's just do it this way. Yeah. That way it's done. Don't ask too many questions. Jeremy wanted to get a per diem for a leather jacket. So we got that. I love how that comes up in every tattoo. Jeremy wanted a per diem for a tattoo. We did that. That's sick though. That would have been a good idea.

Per diem for a tattoo and get a tour tattoo. We did that. Max got one in Houston. No, I didn't get one in Houston. Yeah, you did. We got it together. It must have rubbed off because I don't have it. I thought you did. We went together because I got the Misfits tattoo. I remember that, but I didn't get tattooed that day. I went with you. Okay. I thought you had. No solidarity, man. I'm sorry. Ah, that sucks. Yeah. Well, Turing's cool. Everyone should do it. And stay positive.

Don't thrash the dressing room. Don't thrash the dressing room like that fucking food from LA Guns. If you're from Oxnard, don't be a fool. Follow my clothing, Death Race Clothing. Oh yeah, let's get a shout for that. Why don't you say it better? Like say it so people can understand it for real. You're like mumbling. Yeah, DeathRaceClothing.com Yeah, go to DeathRaceClothing.com If you're from Oxnard, follow me. And Instagram, DeathRaysClothing. Why is it only from Oxnard?

Yeah, you can only buy it if you're from Oxnard. No, but support me if you're from Oxnard. Oh, yeah. Okay. Definitely pay Albert's light bill if you live in Oxnard. Yeah. You gotta buy a shirt. Yeah, pick up a shirt. But if you're in El Paso and you want to look sick, you can also go to DeathRaysClothing.com. If you're anywhere. I bought a sweatshirt. Yeah. But I was here in San Diego, so I think I'm going to return it now.