What does the Bible mean when it tells Christian wives to “submit” to their husbands? Was this kind of submission only for that culture? Is this a free ticket for men to take power over their wives? Should a Christian wife submit to an abusive husband? What is submission, anyway? Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com I'll send...
May 13, 2020•26 min•Ep. 66
In spite of numerous red flags, Kary married her abusive partner when she was very young. After 29 years, she was able to save some money and get out. Now she shares some insight into what made her stay for so long and what she would do differently if she had a do-over. I asked Kary if she could go back and tell her younger self one thing, what would she say? This is what Kary said: "Stop second guessing yourself. Trust your instincts and your gut. If you are uncomfortable, that is God speaking ...
May 06, 2020•40 min•Ep. 65
Emotional abuse tactics leave a target feeling confused and powerless. Learn some strategies to help you recognize the tactics when they happen as well as respond from a place of clarity and power. Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com I'll send you (free!) the first chapter of my book, Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing...
Apr 29, 2020•38 min•Ep. 64
Natalie interviews Gretchen Baskerville, author of the newly released book, The Life Saving Divorce, on the issues Christian women face when contemplating a divorce. Find out why most divorces are actually life-saving. Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here Related Resources: Connect with Gretchen on her website, Life-Saving Divorce . Check out Gretchen's book, The Life Saving Divorce . If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally d...
Apr 22, 2020•43 min•Ep. 63
Learn the seven predictable things that happen when you set boundaries with an emotionally abusive partner. Knowing what to expect in advance will empower you to respond with emotional control and self-respect. Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com I'll send you (free!) the first chapter of my book, Is It Me? Making Sense of Y...
Apr 15, 2020•25 min•Ep. 62
After Lisa lost her husband of 23 years to death, she ended up marrying a man who abused her in every way possible. In spite of opposition from her church home, she got out of her abusive marriage and started Riverledge Farm in Vermont, a gorgeous place where she hosts wedding parties and healing retreats for survivors. Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn mo...
Apr 08, 2020•58 min•Ep. 61
This week Natalie, Becky, and Rachel answer two listener questions. I’m thinking about separating from my husband. How do I explain what’s going on to those on the outside? I’m afraid of their reactions. I was told I am “tearing down my house” when I stand up against my abusive husband and set boundaries. Is this true? Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn mor...
Mar 27, 2020•33 min•Ep. 60
For people with trauma, the suffering doesn't end with the traumatic event. In this episode, Polly Hamp of Think Differently Counseling, Consulting, and Coaching, shares her inspiring journey of healing after trauma, including the moment she told God "hell no," but of course He won anyway. Discover new resources for overcoming your own trauma and why healing can't happen on a timetable. Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here If you are a Christian woman wh...
Mar 25, 2020•40 min•Ep. 59
Healing your faith after abuse is a long and painful process, but it's vital for true healing. Join Natalie for a lesson walking through steps that help you heal your relationship with God. Uncover the two errors that survivors often make during healing, and discover the prize for wrestling the truth from the lies you once believed. Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marri...
Mar 18, 2020•22 min•Ep. 58
Debby tried appeasing her abusive husband for decades, but nothing ever changed. It wasn't until she realized her health was deteriorating that she knew it was up to her to change something. Listen in to Debby's story of survival, how she got in and out of the abuse, and what happened when she went to counselors (with a twist!) Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, ...
Mar 11, 2020•43 min•Ep. 57
Learn how to talk to your children about divorce, and discover the four steps to rebuilding your life after leaving an abusive marriage. Discover one factor that is vital for healing after experiencing trauma. In this episode, Natalie interviews "Life Saving Divorce" author Gretchen Baskerville about how to cope and find healing after a life saving divorce. Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here Related Resources: Connect with Gretchen on her website, Life...
Mar 04, 2020•35 min•Ep. 56
Licensed clinical social worker and abuse survivor Megan Parocha shares about how to help your kids overcome trauma from abuse, divorce, and other difficult life circumstances. Hear the best way to respond when your ex-husband lies about you. Learn the parenting strategy that will help your children build up their inner world and break the generational cycle of narcissism. Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here Related Resources: Check out Give Her Wings a...
Feb 26, 2020•39 min•Ep. 55
Jesus wants you to reclaim your SELF. And do you know how He helps you do that? By helping you understand the skills you already have within yourself - that HE PUT THERE - to rescue yourself. He didn’t create you to be a helpless princess in need of rescue. He created you to be Captain Marvel. In this podcast episode, Natalie will tell you about a tool with the potential to change the course of your life. Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here If you are a...
Feb 19, 2020•26 min•Ep. 54
In today’s podcast episode, Natalie shares own story of how she got into an abusive marriage, why she stayed, and how she got out. Natalie kept journals throughout the course of her marriage, and in this episode she shares an inside look into her heart and belief system while she navigated the relentlessly painful circumstances of her emotionally and spiritually abusive marriage. Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here If you are a Christian woman who think...
Feb 12, 2020•43 min•Ep. 53
Join Natalie and Becky as they answer questions from followers of the Flying Free Facebook page, including: QUESTION ONE: Since a lot of abuse involves financial abuse, lots of us are short of cash. What are some good low-cost ways a survivor can move forward in the healing process? For example, they don’t have money for counselors, therapists, or even the Flying Free group. QUESTION TWO: When I went to my church for help in my emotionally abusive abandoned marriage, my pastor said that there ar...
Feb 05, 2020•34 min•Ep. 52
Join Natalie and Rachel as they answer two listener questions: Question One: My husband is an alcoholic and has a lot of anger toward the church and my religious beliefs. There’s also a lot of emotional abuse in our home. We have three toddlers, and I have been a stay-at-home mom. I find it hard in our marriage to raise three kids in a Christian way when my husband has a lot of anger towards my beliefs as well as the alcoholism and the emotional abuse. I guess my question is how long do I keep h...
Jan 29, 2020•32 min•Ep. 51
When our faith is enmeshed with abuse, it's confusing to tell the two apart. That damages our connection with God. How can we untangle the lies of abuse from the truth of God? We have to do spiritual surgery on ourselves in order to remove the shrapnel of abuse from our hearts of faith--to separate the two so our hearts can beat again in a healthy, strong way in harmony with our Savior. Join Natalie for a lesson that will help untangle you from lies and renew your trust in Jesus, a God who doesn...
Jan 22, 2020•38 min•Ep. 50
Starting with abuse and abandonment in her childhood, Becky was married decades to a man who put it all on her--working, homeschooling five kids, and supporting his selfishness. In waking up, she finally realized the problem wasn't her after all, but that was only the first step in getting out. Listen to Becky's incredible story of crawling to flying. Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionall...
Jan 15, 2020•42 min•Ep. 49
Join Natalie, Rachel, Becky, and Kim as they answer two listener questions. One - what if I don't want to stay even if my husband seems to be changing a little? Two - how can I continue to homeschool if I end up separated or divorced? Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com I'll send you (free!) the first chapter of my book, Is ...
Jan 08, 2020•36 min•Ep. 48
Join several survivors as they get practical about how to go into the new year with hope. Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com I'll send you (free!) the first chapter of my book, Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage , which has an assessment to help you figure out if your relationship is abusive or not. All you h...
Jan 01, 2020•57 min•Ep. 47
One of the first lessons I learned when I first began to get out of my abusive marriage is how to advocate for myself —a hard lesson for a woman who spent her entire life believing that self-advocacy was evil. I now see that when God doesn't rescue you from your bad marriage, it's because He wants to do something so much better in your life. He wants you to get strong enough to rescue yourself. I believe this kind of self-advocacy is a necessary adulting skill that we all need to acquire as part...
Dec 27, 2019•31 min•Ep. 46
Natalie interviews Christy Bauman, licensed mental health counselor and author of new release, Theology of the Womb. Christy talks about the female body and how the way it works tells a story about God and His love for us. "There’s something in all women that we want to create. We want to create businesses. We want to create beings. We want to create relationship. We love life. At our core, we love creating life. We love creating love. It just bubbles out of us. But there is a cost, and the bloo...
Dec 10, 2019•42 min•Ep. 45
The holidays have a way of making abusive relationships, separation, and divorce even worse. Families get split, take sides, and cause more hurt and pain than we think we can bear. Let's talk about how to cope during "the most wonderful time of the year." Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com I'll send you (free!) the first ch...
Dec 02, 2019•35 min•Ep. 44
Abusive people almost always demand reconciliation with their victims. Why is that? What is their motivation? And do victims owe their abusers trust and relationship after having prior trust and relationship violated over and over again? The article mentioned in this podcast is: Message to a Baptist Church: You Preached Death to the Hearts of One Hundred Women Today Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be i...
Nov 25, 2019•25 min•Ep. 43
Six Christian abuse advocates including Julie Anne (Spiritual Sounding Board), Sarah McDugal (Women in Leadership Development) and Natalie Hoffman (Flying Free) gather together to answer two listener questions. One question about finding a good man post-divorce, and another question about how to find a good church after being hurt by a bad one. Lots of great discussion in this episode! Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here If you are a Christian woman who...
Nov 12, 2019•45 min•Ep. 42
Natalie interviews author, counselor, and speaker Andrew Bauman on the intersection of pornography and abuse. Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here Related Resources: Follow Andrew's work on his website and his Facebook page . If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com I'll send you (free!) the first chapter of my book, Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage...
Oct 29, 2019•43 min•Ep. 41
Natalie interviews the founder of Give Her Wings, Megan Owen, about how the church can help victims instead of re-victimizing them. Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here Related Resources: If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com I'll send you (free!) the first chapter of my book, Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage, which has an assessment to help you ...
Oct 24, 2019•39 min•Ep. 40
Rachel and Natalie answer a listener's question about trauma bonding - or why you may feel an addictive bond to your abusive partner in spite of his abuse. We talk about intermittent reinforcement and how that plays a role in abuse. Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com I'll send you (free!) the first chapter of my book, Is It...
Oct 16, 2019•31 min•Ep. 39
In this interview with public speaker and coach, Patrick Doyle, we talk about how to cope with the traumatic betrayal that occurs when women of faith stand up against abuse in their homes. Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here Related Resources: You can connect with Patrick on Facebook . Sign up HERE to receive email updates about upcoming events and materials from Patrick. If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive m...
Oct 01, 2019•59 min•Ep. 38
We were created for love and connection, but abuse cuts off our supply to these necessary components to a healthy life. Natalie interviews ARMS executive director, Stacey Womack, about what we can do when we are starved for affection. Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here Related Resources: ARMS programs , including the “Her Journey” program mentioned in this episode. You can follow Stacey and the ARMS ministry on Facebook and Instagram . If you are a Chr...
Sep 25, 2019•38 min•Ep. 37
